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Love Me, Don't Leave Me

Overcoming Fear of Abandonment and Building Lasting, Loving Relationships
Narrated by: Karyn O'Bryant
Length: 5 hrs and 29 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (15 ratings)

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Summary

Everyone thrives on love, comfort, and the safety of family, friends, and community. But if you are denied these basic comforts early in life through a lack of physical affection or emotional bonding, you may develop intense fears of abandonment that can last well into adulthood - fears so powerful that they can actually cause you to push people away. If you suffer from fears of abandonment, you may have underlying feelings of anger, shame, fear, anxiety, depression, and grief. These emotions are intense and painful, and when they surface they can lead to a number of negative behaviors, such as jealousy, clinging, and emotional blackmail.

In Love Me, Don't Leave Me, therapist Michelle Skeen combines acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), schema therapy, and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT) to help you identify the root of your fears. In this book you'll learn how schema coping behaviors - deeply entrenched and automatic behaviors rooted in childhood experiences and fears - can take over and cause you to inadvertently sabotage your relationships. By recognizing these coping behaviors and understanding their cause, you will gain powerful insights not only into your own mind but also into the minds of those around you.

©2014 Michelle Skeen (P)2016 Tantor

Critic reviews

"[Skeen's] writing is concise and wonderfully clear, with many excellent exercises to give the reader the opportunity to make actual positive changes." (Randi Gunther, author of Relationship Saboteurs)

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great food for thought

this book has given me definitely a lot to think about and has opened my eyes in the patterns we follow without being aware of it. made me view things from a different perspective. also a great narrator.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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Lists and repeats

I didn’t get much out of the book lots of mundane lists and repeated terminology without explanation
Very boring

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  • Karen Y Lin
  • 14-03-18

<br />30% is in workbook format, not ideal for reading

love the content but not ideal for audible format. I would buy the book version because the content is great.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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  • Justin McAdams
  • 15-02-18

Helpful book by a very knowledgeable psychotherapist

This book is great for anyone dealing with triggers related to insecure attachment. I had never heard of schema theory/ therapy, but reading this book has helped me understand why and when I do the things I do. The author writes very clearly and concisely and the activities she gives are very very helpful. She also has PDFs on her website. I even emailed her and she offered to speak with me via Skype about some of my specific questions. A+ book would def recommend.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • Theresa
  • 06-03-18

Wow wow wow! Packed with great info!

What made the experience of listening to Love Me, Don't Leave Me the most enjoyable?

I've listened to many audio books and although some were very good, this one was EXCELLENT! This book may contain all the info that anyone could ever need in order to find and keep a happy/healthy relationship. My confidence in healing past wounds has grown tremendously since listening, and I feel that I have all the tools I need in order to determine what I do and don't want in a relationship, to be able to recognize warning signs in myself and potential partners and dating partners, and to manage my fears without letting them damage a budding healthy romantic relationship! So thankful for this book!

5 of 6 people found this review helpful

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  • MMC
  • 13-04-17

Very insightful and applicable.

This book caused me to consider my childhood experienced being away from my parents and how much they have impacted my life.

3 of 4 people found this review helpful

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  • sony
  • 31-01-17

Mental self help

Excellent adult self help book
Teach you abandonment and coping skill
Teach how to communicate better without negative past baggage.
Teach you listen better skills

5 of 7 people found this review helpful

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  • Cherise Wilson
  • 03-09-19

Powerfully insightful

This book gives a very comprehensive look at how core beliefs share our outlook on life. Helps reader identify strategies for living a value centered life. There are lots of exercises so journaling is required. Introspective and probing yet encouraging. Highly recommended.

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  • lucas'mom
  • 27-08-19

Wonderful guide

This book is amazing. Has lots of evaluations. The best thing is she gets to the root of what might be happening to you so you can understand why you are reacting the way you are. She gives you help literally and tells you how to recognize that you’ve been triggered and how to deal with it. How to recognize it and formulate new coping mechanisms. I’m buying this in paperback too.

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  • Jake
  • 18-07-19

Excellent content, narrator not so much

The content and information provided is truly excellent. Listening to the narrator was excruciating. The sing-song voice made it difficult for me to listen through for long periods. The author provides tools and materials on her website which are very helpful. Would recommend this book for anyone working on improvement after childhood abandonment and other trauma.

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  • Magen Spears
  • 04-07-19

resonating

So much information i was/am needing. Giving me knowledge to support the difficult decisions i need to make and stop putting off.
I will read this book many times over.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 31-03-19

Very Helpful

This book was written in terms that a reader outside of the mental health profession could understand and appreciate. It was insightful and helped me realize things about myself and others in my life. I was glad that I selected it. If you feel connected to the title in any way, I encourage you to read it. The accompanying PDF files are useful as well.