Showing results for "1.000" in Humorous

Dive into the wondrous world of The Stranger Times with this carefully curated selection of short stories from C.K. McDonnell. Drawn from the award-winning The Stranger Times podcast, they are collected in print for the first time, along with the new novella ‘The Raven’. Experience the magical underworld of Manchester (and beyond) with stories featuring lovelorn trolls, blood-thirsty books and a constipated dog who may’ve accidentally consumed a portal to another dimension.

Freddy Stern, a twenty-one-year-old cashier, has lived a plain, albeit harsh life. Having been orphaned—twice—he's spent the last ten years working and staying out of trouble. His only aspiration is to save enough money to become an archhuman. His dream gets the jump on him when he barely survives a near-death encounter and finds himself in possession of 1% Lifesteal, a bizarre talent with numerous contradictions and just as many uses.

For twelve years, the virtual world of Yggdrasil has served as the playground and battlefield for the skeletal lord Momonga and his guild of fellow monsters, Ainz Ooal Gown. But the guild's glory days are over, and the game is shutting down permanently. When Momonga logs in one last time just to...

Ever dreamt of waking up inside a novel? For Kim Roksu, this dream becomes reality when he finds himself in the shoes of Cale Henituse, the lazy, wine-loving son of a count--and punching bag for the novel's destined hero. Determined to dodge his grim fate, this new Cale Henituse vows to rewrite his story, aiming for a life of leisure far from heroic deeds and inevitable beatdowns.

Five friends, gamers for life, gather for their usual game night. Yet, when they use a strange new die they are transported to a fantasy world where all gaming ideas can come true. Together, the party must join forces to deal with the vile Necrolord whose plans will not only threaten this world, but Earth as well. Should be easy for a team of adventurers, but when gaming and real life meet, there are situations which cannot be anticipated.

Ryan lived his life on Earth trapped in his own body. The doctors couldn't explain what was happening to him, but slowly, his body was crystallizing. Then, a portal opened up on the ceiling of his hospital room. He'd seen that one in enough anime to recognize what was happening. It couldn't possibly be worse than the hell that was his life on Earth, not that he was given any choice.

February 2012. Somewhere in the North Atlantic. In an increasingly uncertain defence environment, a deadly new arms race has begun. In an attempt to secure her boundaries, Britain has deployed the very latest sub-sea military technology. Beneath and beyond the front line, these are the adventures of the HMS Goliath. A 55,000-tonne M-Class nuclear stealth submarine, prowling 5,000 metres below the surface, manned by idiots.

Kane is a six-foot-seven French Canadian. But, a year ago, he was a wolf. He'd been in the woods when a crazed, infected man attacked him. The next day, he transformed into a human. Now, Kane is searching for the Biting Man to get the answers he needs to become a wolf again and return to his pack. The only one who knows Kane's secret is a troubled young woman named Emelda. She needed out of a terrible situation; Kane needed someone who could drive. Wolves who become humans are terrible drivers. He also has a problem with moonlight.

I almost hooked up with a werewolf… but before we got to third base, he dragged me off to jail. Apparently, he's the leader of the pack in town. The fact that I’m an illegal blood wolf—a vampire/werewolf hybrid—doesn’t help my case. And he didn't appreciate me accidentally biting him when we were kissing, either. Luckily, or unluckily, he seems to think I'm his true mate, which means he won't let anyone hurt me. But he also won't let me go. Between his possessiveness, my need to be near him, and the vampire clan hunting me, one thing's becoming clear:

Murf is a professional gambler, a confessed liar and thief. He's a coward who's known to be overly friendly to other men's wives and daughters, and he's fled more than one town just a step ahead of people who want his head on a pole--or something much more painful. Cards are his life and livelihood, but he's never taken one of the Unity's magic cards into his soul to become a Holder because honestly, it seems like a horrible way to live to him.

In Ivy's world, stars are everything. She's a Tamer, born to subdue monsters and animals, but she was also born starless! With her life in danger, Ivy flees into the forest where she befriends a weak little slime named Sora--the one creature she can tame. Together, the unlikely pair set off on a journey, salvaging rubbish to survive. Along the way they'll win hearts, evade danger, and discover there's more to starless Ivy than meets the eye!

Wren Greenrock has always known that one day she would steal her sister’s place in the palace. Trained from birth to avenge her parents’ murder and usurp the princess, she will do anything to rise to power and protect the community of witches she loves. Princess Rose Valhart knows that with power comes responsibility, including marriage into a brutal kingdom. Life outside the palace walls is a place to be feared, and she is soon to discover that it’s wilder than she ever imagined.

Brynn was the first to ever activate the world’s hidden Prestige Mode, granting powerful perks at the cost of his godhood and all memories of his past life. Now, he’s at rock bottom in a brutal world where leveling is so deadly most people never try, powerful classes evolve through corestones, and loot is awarded through system-granted achievements. Armed with nothing but a magical helmet and an empty Alchemist’s Kit left behind by his former self, the ex-paramedic must grind his way back to divinity, level-by-level. But regaining his power won’t be his greatest challenge…

What would the world be like if video game rules suddenly applied? Marcus is about to find out. After a freak accident, he finds himself stuck between a game and the real world. He’ll need to fight his way through football hooligans, carnies, and the dreaded RNG to get to the final boss and save the world. Anything less means it’s game over for good. Along the way, he’ll learn new skills, chase epic loot, and, most importantly of all, level up!

In the magic lands of the Fae Wild, the Goblin King's virility is the lifeblood of the realm. But an insidious curse has put the kingdom on the precipice of a population panic. Enter Thomas Stone: architect, engineer, and unknowing half-blood heir to the goblin throne. Whisked away to a world where baby-making makes the world go round, Thomas finds himself in a pickle thicker than goblin stew. Birth rates are dropping faster than a fairy on a bad flight path, and it’s up to Thomas to save the fae from themselves.

To stay alive, he must embrace being a lich. To stay human, he must run the Endless Dungeon… live on camera! Tavin Sorrel was born allergic to magic—a mysterious condition no one can explain and for which there is no cure. He expected to die alone in his magic-proofed apartment, eking out a tiny life by betting on dungeon runs. Until the day he gets possessed by the legendary lich, Zavrak the Malevolent. The possession failed, mostly, but now Tavin is both alive and undead with the stolen powers of history’s most infamous evil overlord.

Bruce Silver is the author of the Riftbreaker novels, one of the most popular, beloved fantasy book series of all time. He's got everything he's ever dreamed of having: freedom to tell the stories he wants to tell, legions of enthusiastic fans who wait eagerly to see what he'll write next, and a really nice car. But despite all that, Bruce finds himself dissatisfied, battling an ennui he can't quite put his finger on. So he decides to do what anyone would do in his situation: burn it all down by unexpectedly killing off Carpathian Einzgear, Riftbreaker's cherished hero.

THE WEAKEST HUNTER OF ALL MANKIND! E-rank hunter Jinwoo Sung has no money, no talent, and no prospects to speak of-and apparently, no luck, either! When he enters a hidden double dungeon one fateful day, he’s abandoned by his party and left to die at the hands of some of the most horrific...

A single slip is all it takes. But the consequences of falling from a rock wall are usually broken bones and bruises . . . not waking up in the body of a dragon. So when a young bouldering instructor finds herself suddenly transported to a strange new world—and into a powerful black-scaled frame— she must rethink all the rules as well as her own expectations in order to survive.

She's unlike any one or any thing else: a Non-Standard Leashed-Intelligence Cybernetic Enforcer aka NSLICE-00P. The first of her kind, she's let loose into a universe of superheroes on behalf of her sinister masters to destroy all who oppose them. And everything's going according to plan—until NSLICE-00P gets hacked and sent into the past to kill her own creator before he creates her. Obeying orders as always, she wastes the poor guy. Unfortunately, there are consequences to initiating a reality-breaking time paradox. The most significant: total ejection from that reality.