In today’s episode, Torie breaks down why cycle breakers panic-agree to things they don’t want to do, why your body goes into survival mode when you try to set limits, and why allowing yourself to change your mind is a crucial part of healing.

Listen to learn:

• Why your nervous system floods when you’re put on the spot
• Why saying yes too quickly is a trauma response, not a personality flaw
• How to recognize when an impulsive commitment no longer aligns with your capacity
• Why changing your mind is a healthy, adult skill even if your parent “freaks out”
• How to start giving yourself permission to choose what’s right for you

• • •

If you’re ready for step-by-step support in breaking these patterns, start with my foundational course Confident Boundaries with Toxic Parents. This is the first place to begin if you want to learn how to set limits without spiraling and stop abandoning yourself to keep the peace.
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/course

Want bonus episodes and an ad-free listening experience? Join You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed:
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

If this episode resonated, please leave a five-star review to help more cycle breakers find our show. Thank you!

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In this episode, we talk openly about cycle breaker shame, why it hits so hard after the holidays, and why these moments don’t define your growth. Listen to learn how to reconnect with the emotionally mature adult you’re working so hard to become.

If the holidays brought up guilt, boundary struggles, or old wounds with a toxic parent, the next step is getting grounded support. Start with the Confident Boundaries with Toxic Parents course. It’s your clear, structured roadmap for learning to set limits without collapsing into guilt or fear:
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/course

For bonus episodes, archived episodes, and an ad-free experience, join the You’re Not Crazy Private Feed:
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

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This week’s episode breaks down why the holidays bring up so much dread, why perfectionism shows up so strongly for cycle breakers, and how to stay grounded when your family triggers you.

Torie Wiksell, therapist and boundaries coach, shares:
• Why “not being triggered” is not the goal
• How perfectionism shows up for cycle breakers
• What’s actually in your control this week
• How to prepare for emotional flooding, guilt, and old survival mode
• A realistic definition of “success” for adult children of toxic parents
• How to navigate the holiday without dissociating or blaming yourself

This episode is your reminder that complicated emotions don’t mean you’re failing. They mean you’re human.

If you need more guidance this week, check out Confident Boundaries with Toxic Parents, Torie’s self-guided course that walks you step-by-step through setting boundaries, navigating guilt, and creating realistic strategies for dealing with toxic family dynamics.

When you enroll this week, you’ll also get her Holiday Survival Guide for free: a practical, trauma-informed roadmap for navigating the season with clarity and confidence.

Get immediate access at ConfidentBoundaries.com/course

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