When a person decides to leave an abusive relationship, it marks a significant loss of control for their partner that can make the abuse escalate. Most domestic violence homicides and serious injuries occur when a person decides to leave an abusive relationship. That is why safety planning is crucial for all people experiencing abuse, even if you don’t plan on leaving immediately.

In this episode, JBWS staff member Robin Hughes discusses:

• General tips to increase your safety
• How to deescalate an abusive situation
• Involving children in safety planning
• Staying safe after you leave the relationship
• And more

CONTENT:

(0:00) Introduction

(2:08) What Is Safety Planning?

(6:00) Preparing to Leave An Abusive Relationship

(8:13) Signs You Need to Deescalate

(10:08) How to Placate an Abusive Partner for Safety

(14:20) Tips for Preparing to Leave An Abusive Relationship

(18:32) "Where Do I Go Now?"

(21:35) Staying Safe After Leaving

(27:35) Document The Abuse

(29:41) Ideas for Safety Planning

(35:48) Safety Planning With A Restraining Order

(39:35) Involving Children in Safety Planning

(43:32) Weapons and Abuse

(46:06) Recap on Tips for Staying Safe

(51:44) Resources and About JBWS

*Every person’s circumstance is different. This podcast is intended to offer general tips for safety planning, not to offer advice. Not every suggestion will be right for you. Call a domestic violence agency and speak with an advocate to develop your own safety plan.

Resources and About JBWS:

JBWS's Services: Jbws.org/services

Morris County, NJ 24-Hour Helpline:1.877.782.2873

Passaic County, NJ 24-Hour Helpline: 1.973.881.1450

General Resources: https://jbws.org/helpful-domestic-violence-information/

Ideas for Safety Planning: https://jbws.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/Developing-a-Safety-Plan.pdf

If you notice controlling or unhealthy behaviors in yourself, JBWS can help. Call 973.539.7801 or visit⁠ ⁠⁠jbws.org/jcnv

If you don't live or work in either Morris or Passaic County, NJ please call 800.799.SAFE (7233)

Intro and outro music donated by Billy Morris

Choking your partner during sex is becoming increasingly common. People engage in breath play to enhance eroticism and sexual pleasure.

But can sexual choking ever be a consensual act? Is it possible to consent to something that could kill you with the same force it takes to open a can of soda?

CONTENT:

Introduction (0:00)Choking vs. Strangulation (2:45)

Can You Consent to Choking? (3:59)

Dangers of Sexual Choking (5:34)

Choking and Abusive Relationships (10:45)

Defining Strangulation (16:21)

Warning Signs of Medical Distress (22:35)

Choking Puts Abuse Victims At Increased Risk of Death (25:34)
Talking to Teens About Sexual Choking (28:46)

BREATHE Protocol (34:24)

Is Sexual Choking Abuse? (37:52)

About JBWS & Resources (41:41)

Resources:

If you are in an unhealthy relationship and living or working in Morris or Passaic County, New Jersey JBWS can help call our 24-Hour Helpline at 1.877.782.2873 or visit jbws.org/services

If you notice controlling or unhealthy behaviors in yourself, JBWS can help. Call 973.539.7801 or visit⁠ ⁠⁠

If you don't live or work in Morris County, NJ please call 800.799.SAFE (7233)

Intro and outro music donated by Billy Morris

It’s difficult to find common ground when you disagree with someone politically. Instead of taking the time to really listen to each other, we get caught up in arguments and proving our points. Too often, this leads us to focus on what divides us instead of what unities us.

In this special episode of Unsilenced: Real Conversations About Abuse the New Jersey Senate Minority Leader, Anthony M. Bucco, spoke about the importance of bipartisanship as it relates to domestic violence. Since domestic violence is an issue that impacts all people, with no regard to their political affiliation, it requires a unified front to end abuse.

Content:

(0:00) Introduction

(2:17) Why Domestic Violence Should Matter to Republicansand Democrats

(3:11) Conservative Values & Ending Domestic Violence

(4:46) Polarization, Politics, & Abuse

(7:08) Domestic Violence Legislation

(11:02) A Message About Abuse

(15:58) A Message from the New Jersey Coalition to EndDomestic Violence

(19:55) About JBWS & Resources

Resources:

Find more resources about restraining orders: ⁠jbws.org/resources

If you are in an unhealthy relationship and living or working in Morris County, New Jersey JBWS can help call our 24-Hour Helpline at 1.877.782.2873 or visit ⁠ ⁠⁠⁠jbws.org/services⁠⁠⁠

If you notice controlling or unhealthy behaviors in yourself, JBWS can help. Call 973.539.7801 or visit⁠ ⁠⁠jbws.org/jcnv⁠⁠

If you don't live or work in Morris County, NJ please call 800.799.SAFE (7233)

Intro and outro music donated by Billy Morris