Most of the wisdom we consume comes from people who have arrived. People with titles, platforms, track records. People who have packaged up what they know and presented it as a formula. This week's guest has none of that. What she has instead is a life, fully, bravely, extraordinarily lived.
Sue Cook is not a public figure. She is my neighbor. One of my mother's closest friends. One of the women who helped raise me after I lost my mum at 14. I have known Sue my entire life. And then I pressed record, and she showed me sides of herself I had never seen in thirty years of knowing her.
Sue grew up with a violent father and a mother who didn't want her. She escaped, raised three boys alone without a car, built a career entirely from scratch, completed a degree in her fifties, and is now caring for Joyce, her 98-year-old aunt, with the same fierce, unsentimental love she has brought to everything in her life. She has never had a safety net. She has never waited for permission. And she has never let anyone else's opinion of what she can do change what she knows she is capable of.
In this conversation, Sue and Daisy talk about what it really means to be strong when you're terrified, why nothing you learn is ever wasted, and what it looks like to build a life entirely on your own terms. Sue shares the unexpected gift her violent father gave her, introduces the zone of proximal development - a concept that reframes where you are right now not as behind, but as exactly in the middle of getting there, and explains what Joyce, at 98 and living with dementia, has taught her about presence, pleasure and how to really be alive.
She also shares the one piece of advice that has carried her through everything: there will always be someone with more and someone with less. We are all just ordinary. Just trying.
This one is for anyone who has ever felt ordinary and wondered if that was enough. Sue has something to say about that.
Every Thursday at 3pm. 🌼
In this episode we discuss:
- Growing up without a safety net and finding strength through adversity
- How to be strong even when you're terrified
- Why nothing you learn is ever wasted
- The zone of proximal development, why you're not as behind as you think
- Giving yourself permission to stop doing things you've always done
- Why we're all just ordinary, just trying
- Intergenerational wisdom, what the elderly can teach us about being alive
- Building a life and career from nothing
- The importance of friendship during parenthood
- Caring for an ageing parent and what it teaches you about yourself
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What found us- Links & Mentions
Holly 'What found me this week'
Sue:
- Quiet by Susan Cain
- Come On Over by Shania Twain
- Conclave — Edward Berger
Guest: Sue Cook
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