Dirk Doebler is the Founder and CEO at Parento Leave, a company dedicated to helping organizations build better parental leave programs. He lives with his wife and 3-year-old son.
Dirk and his wife spent serious time before becoming parents asking a fundamental question: Do we even want kids? And if so, how would we raise them without giving up our own dreams and lives? What emerged from that process is a 3-year-old raised with one of the most intentional, free-range, and contrarian parenting philosophies around. We discussed:
- The case for free-range parenting: Why hovering at the playground harms your child’s development, and why Dirk lets his three-year-old problem-solve on his own.
- Joining our life, not revolving around his: How Dirk and Kate built their parenting philosophy from scratch, choosing to bring their son along on their journey rather than putting their own dreams on hold.
- Navigating pediatric feeding disorders: The surprisingly underdiagnosed world of toddler anorexia and sensory feeding challenges, and what their family has learned on the journey.
- World traveling with a toddler: How taking 30 flights to 10 different countries by age three taught their son to embrace boredom, entertain himself, and love adventure.
- Intentional tech and zero screens: Why Dirk casts videos to the TV instead of handing over a phone, avoids fast-paced cartoons, and views AI as a lazy substitute for authentic parenting.
- Taking two paternity leaves: Why Dirk took a second, full-time parental leave when his son was 10 months old, and why showing up daily matters far more than just "banking" quality weekends.
Where to find Dirk Doebler
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ddoebler/
Where to find Adam Fishman
- FishmanAF Newsletter: www.FishmanAFNewsletter.com
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/adamjfishman/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/startupdadpod/
- X: https://x.com/fishmanaf
In this episode, we cover:
(00:00) Welcoming Dirk Doebler, Founder & CEO at Parento Leave
(03:06) What most parents get wrong: hovering and screens
(05:19) Deciding if we wanted kids and building a parenting philosophy
(08:05) Raising a child who joins your life instead of running it
(09:16) Understanding pediatric feeding disorders in toddlers
(14:12) Dividing household load and the "no quid pro quo" rule
(19:45) Free-range parenting: building confidence and independence
(24:45) Flying with a toddler: 30 flights and 10 countries by age three
(34:06) Tech boundaries: Jitterbugs, window-style TV, and no phones
(38:38) Why using AI for parenting is a lazy substitute
(42:12) Taking two paternity leaves and showing up every single day
(50:47) Lightning round: pilot dads, AI video fails, and minivans
Resources From This Episode:
Parento Leave: https://www.parentoleave.com/
Doona: https://www.doona.com/
Medicine Pacifier: https://frida.com/products/medifrida
The Confident Parent: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/28953434-the-confident-parent
Free Range Parenting: https://www.freerangekids.com/
Lilo & Stitch (Film): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0275847/
The Emperor’s New Groove (Film): https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120917/
—
Support Startup Dad
For sponsorship inquiries, email: podcast@fishmana.com
For Startup Dad Merch: www.startupdadshop.com