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Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship

Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship

By: Nina Badzin
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Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship is a top 1% podcast for anyone who has ever overthought a text from a friend, wondered who’s supposed to reach out first, or quietly questioned whether a friendship is totally fine—or fading away. Hosted by writer Nina Badzin, the show dives into the deeply important and sometimes most confusing relationships of our lives: our friendships.

Each episode of Dear Nina explores the questions adults don’t always say out loud: How do you turn an acquaintance into a real friend? What happens when the effort feels uneven? Why do some friendships grow stronger while others fall apart? Can you stay friends when your kids used to be friends and now hate each other? Friendship is tricky—even for grownups.

Nina has been writing about adult friendship for over a decade, with work featured in NPR, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post, The Guardian, Time, and more. Drawing from listener letters, real-life dilemmas, and thoughtful guests, the show offers practical insight without pretending there are easy answers. These are conversations, not lectures.

Warm, honest, and relatable in the best way, Dear Nina is for anyone who wants better friendships—and reassurance that they’re not alone while figuring it out.


ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO

📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina

📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack

❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group

📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question

🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? That’s probably here.

© 2024 Dear Nina: Conversations About Friendship Hygiene & Healthy Living Personal Development Personal Success Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Relationships Social Sciences
Episodes
  • #181 - Exclusion and the Power to Build New Friendships (with Amy Weatherly)

    #181 - Exclusion and the Power to Build New Friendships (with Amy Weatherly)
    Jan 18 2026
    This week’s episode is an expansion to last week’s conversation with Dr. Noelle Santorelli about relational aggression, belonging vs. inclusion, and “mean mom groups.” The focus this week shifts from spotting unhealthy dynamics to the next (very hard) question: What should you do after you realize you’ve been excluded by the people you thought were your friends?Bestselling author Amy Weatherly returns with a mix of empathy and tough love, reminding us that adult friendship is rarely cut-and-dry. Sometimes the table truly only held four for that event. And sometimes, those people simply aren’t your people. Either way, Amy’s message is clear: you have more power than you think.Together, Amy and I unpack the gray areas of adult friendship and how popular online memes can be contradictory (“There's always room for everyone!” vs. “Protect your peace!”). We discuss why group-chasing usually backfires and how to build connection one brave invitation at a time.In this episode, we talk about:Why adult friendship isn’t “everyone gets invited” the way it is in childhoodThe difference between "a bad heart" and a bad momentHow labeling people as “mean” or “toxic” can keep you stuckWhy it’s usually better to look for a friend, not a groupHow confidence (and self-reflection) changes everythingThe difficult reality: rejection is part of making friendsBuilding your own “table” instead of trying to squeeze into someone else’sAmy: “The secret to being liked is to like other people.”Amy: “Friendship will favor those who are bold enough to be rejected.” Links Mentioned: Last week’s episode (#180) with Dr. Noelle Santorelli on relational aggression and navigating exclusionA version of the Ashley Tisdale story on Today.comNina’s prior episode (#86) featuring Amy + JessAmy's “go where the love is” friendship poem Nina referenced, which can be found on Amy and Jess's Facebook group, Sister I am With You.Dr. Janice McCabe in the NYT on "friendship markets"Meet Amy Weatherly:Amy Weatherly is the co-founder with Jess Johnston of the viral page all about friendship, Sister, I Am with You. They coauthored the new book, Here For It and the Wall Street Journal bestseller I’ll Be There (But I’ll Be Wearing Sweatpants) Find Sister I am With You on: Facebook, Instagram, and on their Website.ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina🎈 Celebrate your friend on the show by dedicating a week of episodes!📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? **That’s probably here.**To dedicate a week of Dear Nina TO YOUR FRIEND, get in touch with Nina at ninabadzin@gmail.com!
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    32 mins
  • #180 - Mean Mom Culture, Relational Aggression, and Belonging vs. Inclusion (with Dr. Noelle Santorelli)

    #180 - Mean Mom Culture, Relational Aggression, and Belonging vs. Inclusion (with Dr. Noelle Santorelli)
    Jan 11 2026
    This week I have a conversation with clinical psychologist Dr. Noelle Santorelli about belonging vs. (forced) inclusion, "mean mom" culture, and relational aggression. And guess what? I recorded this interview with Dr. Santorelli BEFORE the Ashley Tisdale “toxic mom group” article from The Cut was making its way around the internet.I had to re-record my intro to this episode because not addressing the article and the aftermath would have felt off considering our topic for this one. In our discussion, Dr. Noelle and I spoke about what’s really going on when adult friendships start to feel like middle school. We unpack the difference between actual cruelty versus simply not wanting to be friends anymore (those are not the same thing), and why covert behavior is so confusing and painful to experience.Dr. Noelle gives language to things many of us have felt but can’t quite name. She also offers some much-needed reminders to pause, regulate, and stop assuming every social slight has one clear explanation.We talk about:What relational aggression actually is and how it sometimes shows up quietlyBackhanded compliments, hot-and-cold behavior, gossip, exclusion, and “strategic withholding”The difference between being included and truly belonging (and why forced inclusion often backfires) Friendship love bombing and why we should slow down in new friendshipsOne line from this episode that really stuck with me:“Forced inclusion creates fragile belonging.”I also share a very real story about spiraling after getting no response in a group text—and how sometimes the answer isn’t “they’re being mean,” rather it's: “this wasn’t the right time, place, or audience.”My biggest takeaway: focus on patterns, not incidents, regulate before reacting, and ask yourself why you want into a group that might not actually feel safe or aligned.Links Mentioned:A version of the Ashley Tisdale story on Today.comDr. Santorelli's Mean Girl Mom Survival GuideJoin the Dear Nina Facebook GroupMeet Dr. Noelle Santorelli:If you’ve ever found yourself deep in the drama of Mean Girls or Mean Girls in Motherhood (aka Mean Girl Moms), you’ve probably come across Dr. Noelle Santorelli on Instagram. A licensed clinical psychologist, Dr. Santorelli has spent the past 14 years in private practice and holds a position of adjunct faculty at Emory School of Medicine in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences.In her practice, she specializes in working with high-achieving women who’ve experienced early trauma or grew up in dysfunctional, toxic family environments—often with emotionally immature or narcissistic parents. She also has deep expertise in relational aggression across the lifespan, helping women navigate covert bullying from friends, family, and even the workplace. She helps break down the complexities of relational aggression, Mean Girl culture, and how to protect your peace in a world full of social landmines. Find Dr. Santorelli on Instagram and TikTok at @drnoellesantorelliALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina🎈 Celebrate your friend on the show by dedicating a week of episodes!📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? **That’s probably here.**To dedicate a week of Dear Nina TO YOUR FRIEND, get in touch with Nina at ninabadzin@gmail.com!
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    56 mins
  • #179 - Your Newest Friendship Questions, Answered (with My Mom)

    #179 - Your Newest Friendship Questions, Answered (with My Mom)
    Jan 4 2026

    For the first episode of 2026, I have my mom, Kathy Sackheim, in the studio for her 6th appearance on the podcast to help me answer a stack of listener questions straight from the Dear Nina inbox.


    We move quickly through a range of friendship dilemmas from listeners:

    • milestone birthday expectations
    • uneven effort
    • friend group tension
    • an uncomfortable confrontation
    • a group chat blowup
    • reaching out after a long gap since the last hangout
    • and what to do when a friend’s choices leave you conflicted and/or burdened (We slightly disagreed about that last one!)



    My mom, at 80, brings decades of perspective and a refreshingly no-nonsense approach to friendship. We talk about being realistic without becoming resentful, staying nonjudgmental, knowing when to widen your circle instead of forcing a group dynamic to work, and why friends and romantic partners serve very different roles in our lives.

    This episode is thoughtful, candid, and practical—exactly what happens when I put a microphone in front of my mom and let her answer your questions honestly.



    PREVIOUS 5 EPISODES WITH MY MOM:

    • Ep. #1. The Friend Who Will Only Text:
    • Ep. #8. When Friends Ask Questions You Don’t Want to Answer
    • Ep. #36. Widowhood and Friendship
    • Ep. #50. How Friendships Change With Age, Overlooking Foibles, Dealing With Our Teens’ Friendships, and more
    • Ep. #72. Grudges and Apologies in Friendships



    LINKED MENTIONED:

    • Find the anonymous questions in the newsletter at dearnina.substack.com
    • Ask an anonymous question
    • The live episode in Chicago was Ep. #160
    • Join the Dear Nina Facebook Group



    ALL THE DEAR NINA LINKS + CONTACT INFO

    📢 How to promote your service, business, or book on Dear Nina

    🎈 Celebrate your friend on the show by dedicating a week of episodes!

    📱 Subscribe to my newsletter “Conversations About Friendship” on Substack

    ❤️ Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, & the Dear Nina Facebook group

    📪 Ask an anonymous friendship question

    🔎 Want to work with me on your podcast, your friendships, or need another link? **That’s probably here.**



    THIS WEEK'S SPONSOR: Learn more and apply at https://sahaquest.com/ To dedicate a week of Dear Nina TO YOUR FRIEND, get in touch with Nina at ninabadzin@gmail.com!
    Show More Show Less
    27 mins
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