• A Touch Of Gay #65: Keep Building Utopia
    Jun 28 2026

    We Must Keep Moving Forward No Matter What

    Check In:

    * Camping weekend with the chosen family

    * SLATE EV pickup truck pre-order

    From “Surviving Anti-LGBT Politics Part 10”: Keep Building Utopia

    “During the darkest days of the AIDS crisis, we buried our friends in the morning, we protested in the afternoon, and we danced all night. The dance kept us in the fight because it was the dance we were fighting for. It didn’t look like we were going to win then and we did. It doesn’t feel like we’re going to win now but we could. Keep fighting, keep dancing.” -Dan Savage

    We Must Keep Moving Forward No Matter What

    For many of us there has always been a fight. For most of us there will be a fight ahead. We must have something worth fighting for, a win in our days worth the blood, sweat and tears. In the fight we must never forget to keep building our lives as we have always wanted them to be. We must not lose ourselves in the fight.

    Continue reaching for your dreams, knowing these trying times will cement them deep in your foundations of life. Take new opportunities to educate yourself, learn new skills, try new things – build your better self. Come out on the other side of these times with a stronger passion, skill set, purpose and direction.

    Keep building community. Build new alliances and friendships with the people we meet in the battles, share your passions and your energies with them. Join in the celebrations, the fights, and the communion of your brothers and sisters. Welcome new friends into these circles and give them the support they need too. We all need each other now more than ever.

    Never stop creating beauty and celebrating our culture. We are beautiful people who express our color and vibrancy in ways many on this earth wish they could. It’s our superpower, and the one many of those who oppose us are most afraid of. Art, culture, color and celebration of life is why we are who we are. Full speed ahead.

    Be who you are without shame or apology. Our beauty and capacity to love is the thing that makes us special. We need to be visible, vibrant, colorful and joyous. Our example of a good life is the one we must never hide, edit down, discount or put in the closet. Be seen, be heard, you are good.

    We deserve our place on this earth and in the fabric of society. We are worthy of equality, love, respect, freedom, and our place at the table of life. In this fight, keep your eyes on the main goal of your life and never top building toward your utopia.

    Please drop your comments on YouTube or email them to daddysam@atouchofgay.com

    * Website: atouchofgay.com

    * Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky: atouchofgaypod

    * Audio Podcast drops on all major platforms every Sunday

    * YouTube Podcast drops a day early on Saturday

    * Our Podcast plays on GayPHX.com streaming radio every Monday at 10:00am



    This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit atouchofgay.substack.com
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    16 mins
  • A Touch Of Gay #64: Top 5 Reasons Cruising Is Making A Comeback
    Jun 21 2026

    Why gay cruising is back, taking our pride back from the MAGA and the corporations.

    Daily Inspiration: Freeing yourself was one thing, claiming ownership of that freed self was another.” — Toni Morrison

    Social: Five Reasons Cruising Is Back – Leo Herrera

    Leo Herrera’s book “Analog Cruising”, a romantic ode to our sacred history and rite of cruising for sex outlines the top seasons cruising is back. We are in a sexual revolution, act accordingly.

    * Apps keep getting shittier

    * Weapons against disease

    * A new appreciation for IRL

    * A love for our history

    * Daddies Daddies Daddies

    Website: https://iftheylived.myshopify.com/

    Instagram @herreraimages

    Pride Month: Will the corporations come back after MAGA?

    * Who the fuck cares! They are not our friends. They dumped us when the going got tough. We should not be seeking their money or their validation in the future.

    * We need to self fund and self organize. We have the capability to raise money within our own community, support our local organizations, and create our own opportunities.

    * We need to get back to our roots of protest and advocacy. Pride is about power, about unity, about progress, and about advocacy. It was never meant to be a circuit party.

    Pride Month: California county rejects Pride with Traditional Nuclear Family Month

    * On Tuesday, the Fresno County Board of Supervisors voted 3 to 2 in favor of the resolution, which defines the nuclear family as “consisting of one husband, one wife,” along with children, as “God’s design.”

    * The resolution was introduced by Chairman of the Board Garry Bredefeld, who announced the plan on June 6, the same day as the Fresno Pride Parade.

    * This resolution is modeled after similar measures in Republican-led states, including Indiana, Tennessee and Alabama, that celebrate the “traditional” nuclear family in June, despite the month long being associated with LGBTQ+ pride celebrations.

    * More at

    https://www.sfgate.com

    Event: Cumunion Summer

    * Cumunion sex parties all over the world, all the time

    * We are in a sexual revolution, act accordingly.

    * https://www.cumunion.com/

    Please drop your comments on YouTube or email them to daddysam@atouchofgay.com

    * Website: atouchofgay.com

    * Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky: atouchofgaypod

    * Audio Podcast drops on all major platforms every Sunday

    * YouTube Podcast drops a day early on Saturday

    * Our Podcast plays on GayPHX.com streaming radio every Monday at 10:00am



    This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit atouchofgay.substack.com
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    22 mins
  • A Touch Of Gay #63: Sobriety During Pride Month, Remembering Regina
    Jun 14 2026

    We remember dear friend Regina Wells (Regina Gazelle), navigating Pride Month sober, and July’s Up Your Alley event in San Francisco.

    Daily Inspiration: Accept no one’s definition of your life, define yourself – Harvey Fierstein

    * We were all programmed to some level by family and society to fit a mold

    * Parents, church, friends, work, school and media all tell us who we should be

    * Unsubscribe from all of that

    Check In:

    * Crazy season events

    * New high quality microphones

    Social: Remembering Regina

    * Regina Gazelle/Wells

    Health: Sobriety during Pride Month

    * Social pressure to be elevated

    * Pride doesn’t have to be about bars and clubs

    * Seek out sober friends, groups, and events.

    * If you’re in nightlife while in recovery:

    * Be honest about your triggers.

    * Go slowly.

    * Find ways to be useful instead of just there.

    * Keep a drink in your hand—it reduces pressure more than you’d think.

    * Sobriety doesn’t have to mean never going out again but it does mean learning when to leave.

    Event: Up Your Alley Fair – San Francisco – July 26th, 2026

    * Dore Alley is a heavily authentic, sex-positive environment featuring rubber, sportswear, heavy leather, and BDSM gear. Legal nudity is permitted within the event footprint.

    * Streets are lined with dozens of adult vendors, multiple sound stages with live DJs, go-go dancers, and kink performance areas.

    * The main Sunday fair is accompanied by a massive weekend of related LGBTQ+ nightlife parties, leather events, and club takeovers running from Friday through Monday.

    * https://www.folsomstreet.org/up-your-alley

    Please drop your comments on YouTube or email them to daddysam@atouchofgay.com

    * Website: atouchofgay.com

    * Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky: atouchofgaypod

    * Audio Podcast drops on all major platforms every Sunday

    * YouTube Podcast drops a day early on Saturday

    * Our Podcast plays on GayPHX.com streaming radio every Monday at 10:00am



    This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit atouchofgay.substack.com
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    24 mins
  • A Touch Of Gay #62: Pride That Fucks Shit Up
    Jun 7 2026

    Sparkling takes on Pride month including wisdom from Brian Hettler, upcoming Atlanta Leather Pride weekend in July.

    Daily Inspiration: Pride is good

    * Definition: Pride is a primary emotion characterized by a sense of security with one’s identity, performance, and/or accomplishments.

    * It is sometimes considered the opposite of shame.

    * Depending on the context, pride may be viewed as either a virtue or a vice.

    * Typically, pride arises from praise, independent self-reflection, or a fulfilled feeling of belonging.

    Check In: Weathering the shit show

    * Disassociating from the white noise of social wars, trying to focus on what’s in front of me.

    The Pride That Fucks Shit Up – Brian Hettler

    Happy Pride. Not the corporate Pride. Not the sanitized Pride. Not the Pride that fits neatly into a sponsorship deck or sits politely on a panel discussion while everyone nods at each other and pretends they aren’t terrified of being disliked.

    I mean loud Pride. The inconvenient Pride. The Pride that shows up wearing six pounds of leather, glitter in places glitter was never meant to go, and enough confidence to make a room full of strangers uncomfortable.

    The Pride that fucks shits up.

    Wear the thing. Sing the song. Dance badly. Start the fundraiser. Ask for the five dollars. Get on the microphone. Wave the flag. Make the sign. Thrown the party. Build the organization. Join the board. Volunteer for the shift. Tell the truth. Love your people loudly. Be embarrassingly enthusiastic about making the world better.

    Instagram @midasheart

    Event: Atlanta Leather Pride – July 24-25 – Atlanta Eagle

    * Traditional leather contest weekend at historic Atlanta Eagle.

    * Applications are currently open for those interested in entering

    * A a focused celebration of leather culture and community standards.

    * https://atlantaeagle.com/events/atlanta-leather-pride-2026/

    Please drop your comments on YouTube or email them to daddysam@atouchofgay.com

    * Website: atouchofgay.com

    * Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky: atouchofgaypod

    * Audio Podcast drops on all major platforms every Sunday

    * YouTube Podcast drops a day early on Saturday

    * Our Podcast plays on GayPHX.com streaming radio every Monday at 10:00am



    This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit atouchofgay.substack.com
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    16 mins
  • A Touch Of Gay #61: IMLBB Wrap Up, Pride Month Begins
    May 31 2026

    We congratulate winners of IMLBB 2026, encourage support of local pride celebrations, and more!

    Daily Inspiration: Brotherhood has no dress code

    * There is no hard code to be included in the leather or any LGBTQ+ community

    * Communities are a living, breathing, and evolving body that is never constant

    * Change happens whether you participation in it or not – doesn’t need your permission

    Check In: After IMLBB 2026

    * Event drop from elation, sexual energy, and inspiration

    * Bringing spirit and inspiration of event to daily life

    * No title needed to support your communities

    Congratulations to IMLBB Winners

    * Honey Davenport – Mr. Palm Springs Leather

    * Sgt Alex – Mr Cincinatti Leather

    * Denzel Belin - Mr. Twin Cities Leather 2026

    * Atlas Rose - Route 66 Bootblack 2025

    * Jimmy Basset - Northeast Drummer Bootblack 2017

    * Pup Verde - Texas Bootblack

    Pride Month: Support your local community

    * June is Pride Month across the nation

    * Pride events and organizations struggling

    * Support events wherever possible

    * Pride events calendar on our website: https://atouchofgay.com/events/

    Event: Big Bear Romp – August 13-16 – Big Bear, CA

    * Mountains of Men & Mischief at Big Bear Lake, CA

    * The Lodge at Big Bear Lake

    * Thursday to Sunday with events, pools, parties, contests and vendors

    * Passes available and hotel reservations open now

    * https://www.bigbearromp.com/

    Please drop your comments on YouTube or email them to daddysam@atouchofgay.com

    * Website: atouchofgay.com

    * Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky: atouchofgaypod

    * Audio Podcast drops on all major platforms every Sunday

    * YouTube Podcast drops a day early on Saturday

    * Our Podcast plays on GayPHX.com streaming radio every Monday at 10:00am



    This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit atouchofgay.substack.com
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    19 mins
  • A Touch Of Gay #60: Top 10 Survival Tips For IMLBB
    May 21 2026

    Years of lived experience bring Top 10 strategies for a best possible experience at International Mr. Leather & Boot Black in Chicago - and any other large scale leather, fetish, and kink event.

    Top 10 Tips For The Best Experience at IMLBB (and other big LFK events)

    Stay at the headquarters hotel

    * Best proximity and convenience to events, people, the action

    * Often costs more but saves time and money on transportation

    Research the local area

    * Public transportation

    * Local restaurants and stores

    * Pharmacy and medical

    Have your normal diet of water, coffee, snacks for your room

    * Hit the grocery store after your arrive for daily staples

    * Your normal foods will better regulate your digestive system

    * Save expense of restaurants, bodegas, and gift shops

    Pack medications, grooming supplies, and sex stuff

    * Your normal daily medications, supplements

    * Incidentals like pain killers, digestive response, lip balm

    * Shaving, nail filing, hand sanitizer

    Plan your lube and sexual supplies strategy

    * Bring what you can travel with on a plane

    * Vendor mart can assist with some items like lube, brown bottles, and more

    * Clean out supplies like douche products and shower nozzles

    Pack a variety of clothing and gear items

    * Plan for both cold and warm weather

    * Plan for a variety of occasions and events

    * Plan budget for vendor mart

    Be open minded to new experiences or kinks

    * Allow yourself to experience new things and learn new ideas

    * Take in event workshops / educational opportunities

    * Don’t yuck anyone’s yum

    Plan your itinerary menu but be open to changing it up

    * You cannot do it all, so choose events honestly to what you will best enjoy

    * Let go of FOMO and enjoy the present moments

    * Leave the cruising apps turned off and cruise face to face

    * Allow new opportunities to lead you

    Relax and allow yourself a nap or rest

    * Remove yourself from the high energy environment occasionally

    * Make time for a nap, quiet time or meditations

    * Leave the premises and get off the treadmill to decompress

    Avoid over indulging with alcohol or drugs

    * Pace yourself and avoid overdoing it with alcohol

    * Avoid hard drugs all together

    * Recovery meetings on site

    Please drop your comments on YouTube or email them to daddysam@atouchofgay.com

    * Website: atouchofgay.com

    * Facebook, Instagram, Threads, Bluesky: atouchofgaypod

    * Audio Podcast drops on all major platforms every Sunday

    * YouTube Podcast drops a day early on Saturday

    * Our Podcast plays on GayPHX.com streaming radio every Monday at 10:00am



    This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit atouchofgay.substack.com
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    24 mins
  • A Touch Of Gay #59: USA Travel Advisory For LGBTQ+ People
    May 17 2026

    A Touch Of Gay Podcast 59 – 05/17/26

    Protecting yourself when entering USA, new LFK podcast, IMLBB live broadcast.

    Daily Inspiration: It’s our duty to pass our history and culture to our next generations

    * They don’t teach LGBTQ+ history or culture in schools.

    * Learn, read, experience – be a story teller.

    * Leather Archives and Museum: Chigago

    * The GLBT Historical Society Museum: San Francisco

    * The American LGBTQ+ Museum: New-York

    * Lesbian Herstory Archives: Brooklyn

    Check In: Family Business, Getting Ready For IMLBB

    * Palm Springs Discrimination Controversy – last week’s podcast and social media buzz.

    * Finishing leather vests and armbands.

    * Leather contestant send off parties.

    Travel: USA Travel Advisory For IMLBB Visitors

    * TSA can and will search your phone for data that can give them cause to block entry.

    * They are looking for ways to allege of sex trafficking, prostitution, or other illegal acts.

    * Do not pack contraband or items you aren’t comfortable explaining in your luggage.

    * Travel with a clean phone devoid of questionable apps, pictures, history, or connections.

    Media: LFK Podcast with Chad ONYX and Darth ONYX

    * Leather Fetish Kink (LFK), a podcast for the leather and kink communities, welcoming all while centering storytelling from a people-of-color perspective. Expect real talk, shared experiences, a little shade, a lot of laughs, and conversations that celebrate diversity, visibility, and connection.

    * Hosted by Chad ONYX and Darth ONYX, LFK brings candid conversations and authentic voices to the mic.

    * Find them on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music

    * Instagram: @lfkpodcast

    Leather Event: IMLBB Live Broadcast Presented By RECON - Friday 5/22 and Sunday 5/24

    * Be part of the action from anywhere in the world with IMLBB Live Presented by RECON, our exclusive pay-per-view broadcast of the International Mr. Leather Contest.

    * Live broadcast of the IMLBB Contest Friday and Sunday Nights.

    * Hosted by Ralph Bruneau (IML 2017), Girl Complex (IMsL 2017), and Ryan Carpenter (IMBB 2017)

    * PPV Only Interviews and Behind the Scenes Content

    * Price: $50 for individual

    * Local watch parties

    * https://www.recon.com/en/events/calendar/event/1160

    Please drop your comments on YouTube or email them to daddysam@atouchofgay.com



    This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit atouchofgay.substack.com
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    25 mins
  • A Touch Of Gay #58: The Toolshed Incident
    May 10 2026
    Toolshed Palm Springs embroiled in allegations of racism, misogyny, transphobia, and discriminatory treatment toward Honey Davenport and ONYX SoCal-Southwest.Daily Inspiration: When we were wrong we promptly admitted it* Step 10 from 12 step programs.* Immediate, honest and conciliatory inventory of wrongs.* Sincerity is in the timeliness, the complete accounting, and the action to resolve.Leather News: The Toolshed Incident* May 1st, the Toolshed leather bar in Palm Springs held two back to back events starting with the Rodeo Welcome Party in conjunction with the Palm Springs Hot Rodeo from 6 to 8 pm and then a special fundraising event by ONYX SoCal-Southwest from 8:00 pm to 2:00 am.* ONYX SoCal-Southwest is a leather organization dedicated to people of color, and this event was intended to be a community building outreach opportunity for the group and had been planned with Toolshed for months.* The ONYX SoCal-Southwest event was to headline DJ Honey Davenport who is the current standing Mr. Palm Springs Leather of P.S.L.O.D who’s home bar is the Toolshed. Honey Davenport also has a long pedigree of performance and fame in our community on the national level along with their current journey to compete at IML in just a couple weeks.* In the week leading up to the event Toolshed allegedly renegotiated on a number of agreed upon terms including the amount they would pay ONYX from $1000 down to $750 because it’s reported the bar owner said “Honey is too expensive”.* On the day of the event the Toolshed owner contacted Honey Davenport and told them to play country music for the first two hours of their set starting at 8:00 pm during the ONYX Southwest event.* This started a chain of conversation between Honey Davenport and ONYX leaders, then ONYX leaders and the Toolshed owner explaining that country music isn’t a part of what they do at their events, and that are are to paraphrase Honey Davenport, “few intersections between country music and the house vibe he plays for P.O.C. Events.* Honey and ONYX did come to an agreement at the last minute to appease the Toolshed by mixing in some country music during the first two hours of their event even though they felt it was not a good idea.* When Honey Davenport showed up for their set, he found out that the DJ hired for the rodeo event to play country music was asked to stay all night “just in case”, which immediately set a tone for the situation that the Toolshed owner had doubts or a lack of trust in Honey Davenport. Additionally it landed negative because the bar had told ONYX that Honey Davenport was “too expensive”, but they can pay an additional DJ to hang around all night “just in case”.* As Honey Davenport started their set with a country music tune, then second a house mix the owner of the Toolshed immediately came to Honey and sternly underscored they wanted country music to be played, to which Davenport stated they planned to mix in.* Shortly into the set Davenport reported on their video account of the night’s events that a patron who was part of the rodeo crowd came up and asked if they were going to play country music or not, ultimately telling them, “Read the room, it you are in a room full of white people maybe you should play white music.”* At this point Honey Davenport made the decision to leave the event as they did not feel they were honored or appreciated in that moment by the owner of the bar or its patrons, at an event and space that is supposed to be about bringing people of color and community together in a safe environment welcomed.* Davenport transitioned to the other DJ to had been on hand and left, the men of ONYX continued to try and get through their event.* ONYX posted a lengthy statement on their social media explaining their own account of the bad-faith actions of the Toolshed owner leading up to the event, their parallel accounting of how Honey was treated, their steadfast support for Davenport’s actions, and their disappointment in how the Toolshed treated the organization and all involved.* Honey Davenport posted their own video statement on social media the following day which offered his detailed accounting of the night’s events which parallels perfectly with that of ONYX.* For almost a week Toolshed was silent as news of the incident spread across social media, podcasts like Butt Honestly and others. They refused to discuss the matter meaningfully with the parties involved for nearly a week.* On Thursday May 7th the Toolshed finally released a statement on social media which is closed to comments except only to those who applaud them. It reads in vague generalities, carefully crafted terms that equivocates the matter to something of an accounting error that needs to be looked at and investigated. It reads impersonal and detached like boilerplate lawyer speak or even AI generated verbiage.The best response to the Toolshed statement I have seen as of this recording is from Hades Amun-Ra, ...
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    27 mins