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Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing
- Narrated by: Matthew Perry
- Length: 8 hrs and 49 mins
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Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing
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Summary
Shortlisted for The British Book Awards Book of the Year - Audiobook: Non-Fiction
The beloved star of Friends takes us behind the scenes of the hit sitcom and his struggles with addiction in this candid, funny, and revelatory memoir that delivers a powerful message of hope and persistence
In an extraordinary story that only he could tell, Matthew Perry takes readers onto the soundstage of the most successful sitcom of all time while opening up about his private struggles with addiction. Candid, self-aware, and told with his trademark humour, Perry vividly details his lifelong battle with the disease and what fuelled it despite seemingly having it all.
Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that shares the most intimate details of the love Perry lost, his darkest days, and his greatest friends.
Unflinchingly honest, moving, and hilarious: this is the book fans have been waiting for.
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What listeners say about Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 03-11-22
Some interesting insights, mostly a narrative of self pity
I was pretty disappointed with this book; Matthew Perry comes across as self involved to the point of narcissism, and is eager to blame others for his problems.
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61 people found this helpful
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Brad50
- 05-11-22
A story mostly of ego, greed and self pity!
Wow... I love friends, by my god, there is so much ego, greed and self pity in this book it was at times hard to stomach! I think Matthew Perry is lucky to have had people in his life who have cared for him and loved him at least half as much as he loves himself 🤷♂️.... Fame (Friends) has saved his life, had he not had the money behind him and admiration of people around him he would've been a gonner a long time ago.
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49 people found this helpful
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
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Performance1 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Michaela
- 06-11-22
Blame blame blame
I really wanted to like this. I pre ordered this and way looking forward to listening to this audiobook. I am a huge Friends fan and watch all the seasons regularly.
Matthew comes across as a bitter man who blames everyone else for his addiction. Whereas actually, he had a wonderful support network around him and massive opportunities in life.
Such a shame as I now wish I hadn’t listened to it.
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48 people found this helpful
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 06-11-22
Don't bother
it's shocking how this man sees women as social commodities and yet the saviours of his dreams!!
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42 people found this helpful
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
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Performance1 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- T. Greb
- 06-11-22
Could not finish it
I read all but the last hour of the book. I kept hoping if I power through the book it would get better. But it didn't. MP is an addict. I get it, it's a disease. But frankly that disease does not excuse you to be a selfish, cruel, egoistic. Frankly a terrible writer. The book is repetitive (I am sure its a clever play on addiction being repetitive), dull and left me without any empathy to Matty. Yes, you did do it to yourself and you do like the drama that being an ever relapsing addict grants you. I'm promptly returning this book. (Yes you can do that)
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39 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Barry
- 02-11-22
Utterly harrowing
Thank you so much for writing in so much detail about so many personal things. This book kept me up all night listening. I really feel like I understand the Big Terrible Thing so much better now, Obviously I will never understand fully, but you have really opened my eyes to the reality of addiction. This is such a valuable book. I intend to get a couple of copies into the school library at the first opportunity. It will do so much more than years of staff standing up in front of classes trying to teach about addiction in PSHE
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36 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Rebecca bannister
- 01-11-22
Poor me
Hmmm,
It appears all his problems was caused by someone else....
Poor poor me...
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33 people found this helpful
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
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Performance1 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Leila
- 10-11-22
Exhausting
As a fan of Friends I’m sorry I read this book. I wasn’t expecting a barrel of laughs. I knew the subject matter. But the sheer ‘sorry for myself’ thread that ran all the way through this left me feeling exhausted and just wanting to shake Matthew Perry. I hope now he’s clean that he’s doing something more useful with his millions (including proceeds from this book) than buying 10,000 square foot apartments ‘with a view’, only to live in what seems to be three rooms. Harsh critique I know, but if anyone is considering buying this I can only say, spare yourself. It’s nothing but narcissistic offloading.
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22 people found this helpful
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Sniffy and Particular
- 06-11-22
Is this a form of subtle satire perhaps?
Well I'm confused. Steve Coogan came out with the brilliant satire of "Alan Partridge" the cheesy media presenter and we all had a good laugh. Is Mathew Perry, a genius comic actor, doing the same thing here - except - he hasn't changed his name?
Because his description of himself is so negative, endlessly, like Japanese Water Torture, drop-drip-drop-drip..... that after 20 hours you end up thinking "Surely this is a subtle form of satire. This can't be real, can it?" If it is real, his Editor must have been on holiday.
All I've learnt is that Perry is in the habit of making use of women for sex. (He calls it "Friends with Benefits" ) and then when bored with them, he throws them away as if they were used tissue-paper, He has a psycho-babble excuse for that carry-on. Something to do with his self-pity problem. Hmm... I think it is the age-old problem of men not seeing women as human?
He also has the audacity to complain about his life, when millions in the USA are starving, homeless and desperate. This gets a bit ridiculous at first and by hour twenty, it is like being stuck on a plane with a crying child. Deeply irritating. The man just doesnt stop the self-pity. He assumes he is being "revealing", but I'm not sure if he knows what it is that he is revealing. The revelation seem both out of control and given with an expectation that the audience is stupid.
He was on UK television debating with Peter Hitchens. His words about Peter Hitchens were very cruel - but - that might be due to the fact that a man of Hitchens' generation, doesn't really "do" self pity. He made this clear to Mathew Perry. It was an exchange between the "Real" men of the War-Generation, and the "Pity-Me Men" of the Peter Pan generation. Fascinating TV - and Hitchens of course, did win. Perry seems very cross about that still. Waspish, in fact.
I loved his performance on Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. He should be proud of that, but he didn't seem to be. He plays a character (TV writer/producer) who is intent on destroying his on/off girlfriend, (Sarah Paul) because he hates the fact that she is a Christian. She compromises her Christian faith by having sex outside marriage with the TV writer played by Perry. She expects a marriage proposal, but doesn't get one. Instead, what she gets is psychological cruelty, brilliantly written, whereby the TV writer attempts to "replace" her faith in God, with a sex-based faith in HIM. He slowly destroys her until by the end of the series, she writes her own death-sentence by opting for his "I will have sex with you, but never marry you", dictatorship. A horrible thing. It is a brilliant study in cruelty and manipulation, dressed up as "love". Surely Perry noticed this? It would have been nice to hear his "take" on this very unusual story from Aaron Sworkin. "Love" disguising pure hatred.
My conclusion is that I would like to hear ANOTHER book from Mathew Perry. A book which charts his choice to give away all his money to the needy, while he gets himself a useful-to-society job. Something that will give him an idea of the value of health, of life, of people, of the dollar earnt. He may have squandered his life but he's not dead yet.
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15 people found this helpful
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Lisa
- 07-11-22
Prepare to like Matthew Perry less?
Left me feeling annoyed, the man who has everything whining about his addictions. I don’t wish to sound unsympathetic, but it’s not an uplifting story. Not sure why he wrote it.
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14 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Nicholas Bryant
- 01-11-22
The High Highs & Low Lows of being Matthew Perry
This is an absolutely fascinating tell all story. As a massive fan of the actor and his character on Friends, it exceeded my expectations. The depth he goes into explaining his high highs and low lows - and hitting rock bottom and then going through rock bottom - is gut wrenching and heart breaking. Never knew how shocking his addiction was nor his ability to hide it and still perform. 10/10
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4 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- E
- 04-11-23
So open and true
I find this so sad. And yet I love Matthew Perry as long as I can remember. My thoughts about him would never ever have come close to this broken man. How true is this that it is an illness and something that I myself can never understand. My dad was an alcoholic and I could never understand why he was so ‘weak’ and yet it sadness me that some people have to bear a addiction that we can not understand. He is now gone and I still feel so sad about it but after listening to his story it is clear what he went thru. My only prayer is that Matthew has now found piece and that he now can understand how much we loved him and his work. I have watch Friends many times and can watch it many more times and it still will make me so happy and grateful! RIP - you will be missed.
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 01-11-22
Chandler / Mathew
Nothing short to be called
Real struggle of Mathew Perry / Chandler Bing.
His acting skills and comic timing were no match to any other actor in his generation or any future generation.
I wish we saw more of his work or had more of his interviews. Please don’t ask him about his past personal issues. Ask him how good of an amazing actor he is.
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Heidi Tordrup
- 10-12-23
His honesty
It makes it easier to understand the struggles of the alchoholic - the sickness. - that just one drop of alchohol tears the membrane away. The hope that it is possible to break out of this hell.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Emjay
- 04-12-23
A generous and revealing autobiography
I was extremely saddened to read Matthew’s autobiography and learn how shaky he was on the inside.
He was very generous in writing this bare- all account of some very serious addictions and long standing frailties.
If only he know how many people loved him,
It is incredible the heights he soared to on top of all that angst, insecurity and self destruction.
I hope he is now at peace and happy.
This book needed to be written so that non- addicts can better understand what goes on for people who suffer addiction issues. Thanks Matthew and RIP x
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 29-11-23
It gives a very clear picture of the extremely difficult lives of addicts
Although heart breaking, it is very interesting to take a look into the life of a person who fights his addictions, let alone when you read the book after this person has recently passed away. Perry was very honest on his addiction and his battles, at a brutal point, but this is the right way in my opinion. There are not enough indicators of dates and as he was going back and forth into the timeline I was puzzled in many points of the story. I think the book lacks editing in this respect. His bitter humour shows up often and you cannot help but recognizing pieces of Chandler into Perry's personality. Actually it was the other way round, Chandler was Perry. Amazing. Apart from that I felt uncomfortable with all the stories of his love life. I know it is the book I am rating and not his life per se, but it felt like this part was sort of boasting rather than telling a story, there was no essential discussion on those parts. I didn't mind him boasting about the money and fame he had, because that was an important part of his story. All in all, his writing is very straightforward, not suitable for all parts of his autobiography and at times makes you lose interest. But you should read it if you want to know what kind of hell exists for people who are addicted to substances.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 29-11-23
Most authentic biography
This books was both horrifying and funny. I love how he takes us into his world and shows us just how beautiful and amazing it was, yet throughout these great experiences, he is hounded by “The Big Terrible Thing”. I have a better understanding of addiction and what it can do to a person.
And I have immense respect for what Matthew Perry went through in his struggle to get out of it. I really enjoyed this book and would highly recommend it to anyone.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- asia
- 27-11-23
His voice and the passion he put in the book
Absolutely amazing and touching. Matthew Perry was a beautiful soul. He is gonna be missed my so many
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 25-11-23
Matthews voice
I will never watch Friends the same again! We never know what others are dealing with. It is so easy to believe in just what you see. I am gratefull i had a chance to hear his story told by himself! It was powerfull and i sm sure it will guide a lot of people to the right direction. To kerp fighting even when it looks like there is no point fighting. Fly high Matthew… you are finaly free…
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Sara Ö.
- 21-11-23
Newfound respect for Matty
The story brings both heartache and awe. since Matty recently left this world, it hits you how much he had struggled and finally was in a good place. Performance wise I had to adjust the speed to 1.25 and English isn't even my native language, but the pace was too slow.
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