Showing results for "Vampire! Vampire!" in Humorous

'This book is bloody brilliant' V.E. Schwab ‘A ripping read’ Joe Abercrombie The SUNDAY TIMES and NEW YORK TIMES bestseller from the award-winning author of the Nevernight Chronicle It has been twenty-seven long years since the last sunrise. Ever since, vampires have waged war against...

Vincent regrets his actions. He's hurt someone he loves. And he's not sure he can make it right.

Dean Castle thought the hard part was over. He'd survived the end of the world, built the infrastructure for Evermoon Hollow, and earned his place among the gorgeous vampire women who call the trailer park settlement home. Now he's finally building something permanent—a real cabin, a real life, and real bonds with Susie, Minni, Milly Ann, Dolly, Delphine, and the shy werebat Violet.

Gabriel de León has saved the Holy Grail from death, but his chance to end the endless night is lost. After turning his back on his silversaint brothers once and for all, Gabriel and the Grail set out to learn the truth of how Daysdeath might finally be undone. But the last silversaint faces peril, within and without. Pursued by children of the Forever King, drawn into wars and webs centuries in the weaving, and ravaged by his own rising bloodlust, Gabriel may not survive to see the truth of the Grail revealed.

This is not a fish out of water, enemies to lovers romantasy. This is me—a barely functional adult—attempting to live my best life, which consists solely of reading books, eating cheese, and falling asleep on the couch. It does not include making friends with werewolf chihuahuas, meeting a moth faerie prince, or defeating a boogeyman.

Dean Castle arrived at Evermoon Hollow with nothing but his truck, his toolbox, and a whole lot of guns. Now he's the sole human handyman in a survival commune filled with gorgeous vampire women. With their unique diet compromising their strength, they need not only his practical skills, but also his killer instinct to survive. Building plumbing systems, blasting monsters, scavenging the wasteland, and unlocking supernatural powers with an unlikely fey companion—all in a day's work for our hero.

Brought to you by Penguin. Amelia Collins is tired of constant questions about her nonexistent dating life, so she decides to get everyone off her back once and for all by finding someone – anyone – to pose as her date to a family wedding. If he's annoying, or embarrassing, so much the...

My name is Masie Kicklighter, and I work at my family’s local bar in the heart of Tennessee, slinging whiskey and living a quiet life. I can’t say my life was perfect, but when a local vampire started stalking me and sayin’ all sorts of crazy things (I was not his. Nor would I ever be.), my first instinct was to run. But Leiper’s Fork was my home.

To earn his pardon and avoid becoming yet another necromancer statistic, Timmy has to work for the Council. From bandit uprisings to giant sea serpents and ogre invasions, Timmy and the others are there to save the day—sort of. When the dragon egg their resident pyromaniac stole hatches to reveal the world’s cuddliest harbinger of death, Timmy and the others are dragged into a pair of diabolically dangerous missions. Breaking out of one of the world’s most secure prisons was hard enough. Now, they have to break back in to rescue a vampire.

Piper and Noah return in Vampires and Violas, the second book in A Vampire's Guide to Gardening. Hi, I'm Piper Edwards, and I'm pre-vampiric. Don't worry—it's not as bad as it sounds. Right now, my love life is far more complicated than my diet. Taking prescription blood three times a day?...

By night, they fight in a dangerous game of cat-and-mouse. By day, they are friendly next-door neighbors. Neither of them know that their alter egos are archenemies. I’ve spent my life training in the family business of slaying vampires, but I’m tired of all the death. I want to prove we slayers can help society, not just break it. I start my new life by joining the Magiford supernatural task force, which exists to protect humans and supernaturals from harmful magic.

What happens when a normal man is reborn as the dark heartthrob of a fantastical kingdom in a magical world—the Vampire Lord—and forced into survival when his real intentions are misunderstood by the people there, who perceive him to be an evil monster intent on destroying them all? Reborn in another world as a horrific incarnation of the night, things actually seem to be looking up for the newly reincarnated Vampire Lord Inkume, until he discovers that all of his newfound dark magical powers are actually rather unimpressive—barring one: his unnaturally beautiful vampiric outer appearance!

After barely surviving the first onslaught of holy warriors, overzealous priestesses, and determined heroines, the world's most heartthrob-by-necessity Vampire Lord isn't out of the woods yet! Once an introvert just hoping to keep his head attached, Inkume now faces ever more determined adventurers eager to claim his demise… or perhaps, fall under his unexpected spell. But life as an unwillingly charming villain only gets more complicated.

The endgame draws near for Vampire Lord Inkume. After defying fate, surviving relentless sieges, and forging unexpected bonds with the strangest of friends, villagers, and the heroes once sent to destroy him, Inkume now faces a witching hour darker than any midnight ever before. His dungeon, now a true refuge for misfits and monsters alike, stands at the crossroads of annihilation and new beginnings, as the armies of the world finally unite to storm his haunted halls.

Alex knows he is a cliché. After all, a vampire pining for a human girl? He might as well put on a Team Edward shirt and call it a day. Still, despite his werewolf best friend's constant comments about 'Glittering chests,' he can't help himself. So, when his crush announces that she is leaving his online class to return to Green Lake Academy, he decides to throw good sense away and follow.

The second book in the hugely popular hilarious supernatural romance Accidents Happen series by USA TODAY bestselling author Jessica Cage, where a young woman named Whitney accidentally hooks up with a drop-dead gorgeous vampire, only to find that when her blood pressure rises, the undead just...

Action-packed and laugh-out-loud funny, the Sasha Urban series is your next binge listen! Analyst. Illusionist. Psychic? When Sasha Urban finally gets the chance to perform her magic tricks on live TV, the last thing she expects is to discover that she has very real, very scary powers. Oh, and to be totally humiliated in the process. But being made to look like a fraud is the least of Sasha's problems now that she's been thrust into the dangerous world of the Cognizant. But will she be able to master her psychic powers in time to save herself when everything goes wrong?

As the line between desire and danger blur, my attraction to the enigmatic vampire leader reaches epic proportions. But giving into my lust will have far-reaching consequences that neither of us can ignore. As the prophecy unfurls, a chilling revelation emerges from the shadows, threatening to shatter my new world. Guided by a death-dealing mentor, I must face my toughest trial yet, while navigating a treacherous web of clan distrust and malevolent falsehoods. But a former ally turns their back on me and my family, and I discover an unexpected truth about the elusive Rene.

The epic conclusion of Sasha Urban's story. I found my family, I found my heart, I found myself. But it’s not over. No matter how many allies I have, there's no escaping destiny. The end of the world is coming, and I'm the only one who can stop it.

"Wenn eine Frau ein Küchenutensil zwischen den Fingern hat, dann hebe die Hände, gehe langsam drei Schritte zurück, dreh dich um und lauf um dein Leben! "Wie wahr solche Sprüche sein können, darf der arrogante Vampir Jeremy nun am eigenen Leib erfahren. Linett, Zeugin eines Mordes, soll eine Aussage machen, die nicht nur dem Mörder sondern im Dominoeffekt auch der gesamten Pariser Unterwelt erhebliche Probleme bescheren könnte. Was für Jeremy als leichter Auftrag (Töte das Mädchen!) beginnt, entpuppt sich schon bald als größte Herausforderung für den erfahrenen Auftragskiller.