Can you still call yourself a lesbian if you’re married to a man?

In this Quickie episode, Alix & Kayla unpack one listener story that immediately sent them into a spiral of questions, nuance, and identity politics. After a Sister Wife writes in to share that she’s identified as a lesbian her entire life—except for one unexpected exception: her husband—the conversation turns into a deep dive on labels, attraction, fluidity, and whether definitions still matter in modern queer relationships.

They explore the difference between identity and behavior, why some people feel deeply attached to labels like “lesbian” or “straight,” and whether falling in love with one person can shift how you see yourself entirely. Along the way, they discuss late-in-life attraction surprises, JoJo Siwa discourse, internalized biphobia, the politics of queer labels online, and how different the reaction might be if the genders were reversed.

It’s thoughtful, messy, funny, and full of the kind of complicated gray-area conversations the internet absolutely loves to fight about. Whether you feel strongly about labels or not, this episode asks a bigger question: who actually gets to define someone else’s identity?

🔔 Subscribe on YouTube for more episodes
🎧 Listen on Spotify
Follow WNS on Instagram
Follow WNS on TikTok
Follow Kayla
Follow Alix
Visit our retreat center in Nicaragua!

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

What does it actually mean to be a late-in-life lesbian… and is there even such a thing as “too late”?

In this episode, Alix & Kayla dive into one of the most requested topics from the Sister Wives community: realizing you’re queer later in life. From women coming out in their 30s, 40s, and beyond to the grief, freedom, and total identity spiral that can come with it, this conversation is equal parts hilarious and deeply emotional.

The episode starts off chaotic (as it should) with a game of Gay or Nay, breaking down the “signs” that maybe your best friendship was a little too intense, why overanalyzing every interaction with a woman might mean something, and whether being too much of a girls’ girl is… well, kind of gay.

But things quickly shift into deeper territory as they read listener stories from women navigating divorce, motherhood, long-term marriages to men, and the quiet realization that something has been missing for years. They unpack the grief of feeling “late to the party,” the heartbreak of hurting a good partner, and the strange peace that comes with finally being honest with yourself.

Along the way, they share their own stories of missed signs, intense friendships, and the ways queerness can sometimes show up emotionally long before it shows up romantically or physically. They also talk labels—baby gay, late bloomer, femme, masc—and ask whether these labels are helpful, harmful, or just plain fun.

It’s funny, tender, validating, and full of the kind of honesty that makes you feel a little less alone.

🔔 Subscribe on YouTube for more episodes
🎧 Listen on Spotify
Follow WNS on Instagram
Follow WNS on TikTok
Follow Kayla
Follow Alix
Visit our retreat center in Nicaragua!

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

In this Quickie episode, Alix & Kayla spiral into one of the most accidentally hilarious conversations yet after realizing an ex might be lurking on their podcast TikTok. What starts as a simple “wait… does she listen?” quickly turns into a full-blown conversation about exes, boundaries, social media stalking, and the very lesbian art of never fully disappearing from each other’s lives.

From suspicious TikTok profile recommendations to the absolute chaos of accidentally following an ex’s entire friend group on Instagram and LinkedIn (yes, really), they unpack the difference between harmless curiosity and crossing a boundary. Along the way, they revisit one of the most painfully funny stories from early in their relationship: trying to cut ties with an ex who just would not stop reaching out.

They also get into the bigger questions behind it all:
Is it normal to check up on an ex?
Would you listen to their podcast just once?
And where does curiosity end and creeping begin?

It’s messy, hilarious, slightly mortifying, and deeply lesbian in the most relatable way possible.

🔔 Subscribe on YouTube for more episodes
🎧 Listen on Spotify
Follow WNS on Instagram
Follow WNS on TikTok
Follow Kayla
Follow Alix
Visit our retreat center in Nicaragua!

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!