Is there an ideal body type? Body types and ideal body types are always changing. Standards of beauty vary from time period to time period. We even see that today. Different countries will often have different standards of beauty and looks.

The problem with these types of standards is that for many of us, they aren’t possible so we don’t even try. What is the use of being in shape if we will never reach a “standard” of perfection? We have to change our minds when it comes to this and it starts with us having the right attitude.

We are using the term “Beach Ready Body” and we want to explain what that means on today’s show.

A beach-ready body isn’t an ideal of perfection, as much as it is an individual goal for a person. It is a term we are using to focus on being healthy all the time and not just going on vacation when people will see us at the beach. We want to focus on living a lifestyle of healthiness which means at any time we could go to the beach. Our health should not be about an event but about a lifestyle journey.

• The process of living healthy starts with us seeing the process as a journey and not just a target.
• Everyday habits and choices are the key to sustained success in health

• The journey of health is a journey of identity.
• Too many of us struggle to see ourselves as a “healthy” person.
• We see our flaws and screw-ups and often give up before the payoff happens
• Our identity has to change if we are going to see long-term sustained success.

• One thing that turns many of us off from health is the health nuts
• People who act like that are just wanting the attention.
• We want to walk the health journey because it’s what is best for us and our family
• We want to be good stewards of our bodies.

• The top thing that stops us from the body and health we want: Giving Up.
• People often give up because they have “tried” through the years.
• We start excusing our unhealthiness and justifying our lack of effort
• We can’t expect short-term fixes to solve long-term problems.

• This is a big part of why so many of us don’t build healthy habits. We think it means we can’t enjoy our food anymore.
• Living healthy can help us enjoy our food more.
• We don’t just accept anything to eat. We learn to enjoy food that is really good instead of whatever is available.
• We don’t have to be obsessed with food to enjoy food. We can enjoy it and still live a healthy life. We just have to keep food in its proper place.
• Food doesn’t fix things and shouldn’t be a source of comfort.
• We should enjoy food but not expect our food to fix emotional issues in our lives.

• We have to be honest: Getting started will be hard!
• Mindsets take time to change.
• We have to focus on the reality of why being healthy matters.
• It is an uphill battle

• When we decide to go on a journey toward healthiness, remember that it takes time.
• Health isn’t a streak you maintain. Messing up once doesn’t end your healthy life!
• We will go through different seasons where we focus on physical health and some seasons where we are looking at other areas.

• There are times when we go to an event and there isn’t anything super healthy that is offered to us, so what do we do? Binge Out???
• Try to go with the best options that is there and don’t give yourself an excuse to binge out.
• We don’t live in a perfect world and we

Life often never goes as we planned. Many of us had dreams as kids of what we wanted to be when we grew up. Most of us change those many times before we become adults. No one’s life goes according to their first initial plan.

Why is this? Because we all make adjustments as we grow. We learn about ourselves and we mature in our values. Adjusting to life is part of living life well. We adjust to things like jobs and relationships. Having confidence doesn’t mean we get everything right. It means we have an attitude of adjustment.

On today’s show, we talk through 3 key ways to ensure adjusting is part of building a confident life.

Pick a Direction

- You can’t adjust your direction if you have no direction.

- Why are you here? What does a great life look like in a normal week?

- A lot of guys never answer that question.

- Survival mode is the path of least resistance.

- You can only behave beyond your current standard when you look beyond your current reality.

- Picking a direction is part of living a confident life

- When you don’t pick a direction, you’ll wander from fad to fad.

- Not choosing is a choice. When you don’t pick your direction it is picked for you (listening to music, watching streaming vs TV channels)

- When we don’t pick, we are giving control of our lives to others

- Key Idea: Choices aren’t permanent- they’re tests for feedback

Set Up Boundaries

- Gardens flourish within the right conditions, grass looks lush and green when taken care of

- Too often we don’t work on the boundaries of our lives so we can’t flourish

- Boundaries Focus our Work and Energy

- Boundaries Make Decisions Easier

- It is deciding before you have to make the decision.

- Boundaries Protect Us, even from ourselves

- The simplicity of the concept of boundaries doesn’t mean they are easy

Make Micro Adjustments

- Making adjustments is a good part of living our lives

- Flights adjust constantly as they travel to get to their destination

- We do the same thing as we figure out what works in our life

- We prototype things and then drop it or adjust it

- Don’t always adjust everything- have a planning, executing, and evaluating rhythm.

- These are all micro adjustments and they are a part of life

- You won’t be perfect and shouldn’t expect to be, but if you don’t try you won’t know

CHALLENGE

- Quit waiting for Perfection to pick a direction

- What are the core 4 to 5 things you value most in life?

- What doesn’t a lifestyle that supports those things look like on an average day?

- What does the schedule look like in an average week?

- Where do you live and who are you with?

- Boundaries

- What boundaries do you need to start living that way today?

- Read Boundaries by Henry Cloud & John Townsend

- Go to www.boundaries.me

- Embrace adjustments and look for ways to improve

- Make a plan/prototype.

- Set a start and end date.

- At the end date ask yourself:

- What worked well?

- What made it difficult?

- What did I learn about myself in the process?

- How can I adjust to fit the future I desire? (could even mean stopping something)

- Understand that change isn’t always better

- You don’t have to constantly be changing everything

- Sometimes maintaining what you’re doing is best.

- Be wise in your adjustments. Be selective. Only work on 1-3 areas at a time. NO MORE THAN 3. Preferably 2 or less.

- Sometimes the best adjustment is to stick to the original plan and focus on it

Watch and Enjoy!

David & Reese Maxwell...

Being the main character of your own life and building confidence only happens when you have focus. Our focus on the why behind our lives really does matter. Too often we are so busy living life that we never think about why.

We call this survivor mode. A way of life for too many of us

We have to start living with purpose in the face of the busyness of life

Busyness is a distraction and deception for too many of us

We want to escape the survivor mode by focusing our lives and we do that by recognizing some key mental traps that we can get caught up in

Trap #1: Activity = Success

- Everyone is busy today

- Busyness isn’t evil

- Busyness isn’t evil, but busyness isn’t necessarily success either

- The problem comes when we allow ourselves to take on the activity = success mindset

Trap #2: Riding vs Driving

- The reality of the “Victim Mentality” and how it has permeated our society today

- Question “Is life moving you are, or are you moving you”

- Many of us act like we are on a roller coaster instead of driving a car

- **Decide Your Destination**

- **Evaluate Your Every Day**

- The calendar is the greatest mirror of what your priorities really are

- “Desires without discipline will only be dreams”

- Use the Word No

- We have to learn to say no to ourselves first

- Men who can’t control their own appetites can’t control their life

- We have to learn to say no to others

- We have to say no to the urgent and unimportant

- This is simple but not easy

Trap #3: The “One Day” Dream

- Our society pushes and showcases the “one-day” dream

- One day will never happen if we aren’t ready for it

- The lottery mentality - dreaming of how you’ll spend the millions but not doing anything to earn money now

- Are you a good steward of what you have now?

CHALLENGE

- Ask yourself, “Why am I so busy”

- Am I choosing what I do or allowing it to be selected for me?

- Do this in the reality of your life.

- Write out everything you are committed to, and how much time that takes each week, and look at that list. Are you setting yourself up for stress and overcommitment?

- You can’t control everything but what CAN you control

- Start with the little daily decisions

- Are you choosing how you live or just surviving in the little things of everyday life?

- The “one-day” mentality comes from feeling overwhelmed with all the stuff life throws at us

- Do you need all the decisions you have to make?

- Start fixing the small areas and you will build up strength for the big areas

Watch and Enjoy!

David & Reese Maxwell

RESOURCES TO HELP YOU THRIVE AS A MAN

========================

Thriving Man Coaching Resources

4D MODEL FREE PDF