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About two years ago, I hit a wall.

I'd been teaching Stoicism for years. Writing about it. Making podcasts about it. And I was still losing my temper. Still spiraling over emails. Still lying awake replaying conversations.

I knew the philosophy cold. And I couldn't apply it when it mattered.

That's when I started asking: what would actually help me? Not more books. Not more content. Something with structure. Accountability. Personal guidance. A quiet place to train.

I couldn't find it. So I built it.

In this episode, I'm introducing The Stoic Vault—a training ground for people who've read the books but struggle to apply them. I'll walk you through what's inside, who it's for, and how to join as a founding member.

Learn more: stoicvault.com

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Epictetus didn't write books. He ran a school where students lived for years, practicing responses to insults, hardship, and loss. Marcus Aurelius wrote the Meditations as a daily training regimen—the same ideas, over and over, drilling them into his reflexes. Seneca reviewed his day every single night for decades.

The Stoics weren't building a library. They were building a gymnasium for the soul.

Somewhere along the way, we forgot this. We turned philosophy into content to consume. We read about the exercises instead of doing them.

In this episode, I explore what Stoic training actually looked like, why our modern approach would baffle the ancients, and what practice looks like in daily life—not in theory, but in the specific exercises you can start today.

Plus: I've been working on something to make this kind of structured practice easier. I'll share more soon.

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A few months ago, I was in a conversation that started to go sideways. I could feel the tension rising—the tightening in my chest, my voice getting sharper. I knew exactly what was happening. I've studied this. I've taught this. I know what Marcus Aurelius would say. And in that moment, it was like I'd never read a word of Stoicism.

If you've spent any time with this philosophy, you've probably had your own version of this experience. The email lands and you spiral. The criticism stings and you're devastated. Someone cuts you off and you react exactly the way Epictetus said not to. This is the gap between knowing and doing—and it's the central challenge of practicing philosophy.

In this episode, I explore why the philosophy disappears when we need it most, what Seneca confessed about this exact problem 2,000 years ago, and why more reading isn't the answer. Spoiler: the Stoics weren't building a library. They were building a gymnasium for the soul.

In this episode:

• The moment I knew exactly what to do—and didn't do it
• Why intellectual understanding is not the same as embodied skill
• What Seneca admitted about knowing vs. practicing
• The difference between studying Stoicism and training as a Stoic
• A reflection question to sit with after listening

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A 15 minute, Yoga Nidra–inspired sleep meditation designed to help your body soften and your mind quiet. We’ll move through a slow, systematic relaxation from head to toe, then drift into a gentle “safe floating” visualization—before fading into spacious silence to support deep sleep.

A subtle Stoic thread runs underneath: release what cannot be changed, and return to the only place you ever rest—this moment.

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What if aliens installed a silent CCTV camera above your shoulder for 30 days and compiled a report on what you truly value—based purely on your calendar, screen time, purchases, and how you spend your evenings? Would you recognize yourself?

Jordan Peterson says if you want to know what someone believes, watch their feet, not their words. The Stoics put it even more bluntly: Acta non verba. Actions, not words.

In this episode, Jon Brooks delivers one of the most practical and transformative frameworks you'll hear all year: The Stoic CCTV Protocol—a 7-day experiment that combines ancient Stoic practice (prosoche, voluntary discomfort, evening review) with modern behavioral science (implementation intentions, friction design, identity reinforcement) to help you close the gap between your stated values and your lived values.

You'll learn:

• Why "I don't have time" is a lie your calendar can expose in 5 minutes
• The forensic audit that reveals your real priorities (prepare to be uncomfortable)
• How to calculate your "Alignment Score" and what to do if it's below 40%
• The Integrity Bank method for rebuilding self-trust one tiny promise at a time
• Why your phone is a spiritual X-ray (and how to turn it into a training tool)
• The complete 7-day CCTV Protocol with daily practices you can start today

This isn't about motivation. It's about systems, structure, and seeing clearly. If you've ever felt the sting of saying one thing and doing another—if you've ever wondered why you can't seem to show up for the things you claim matter most—this episode is your forensic evidence and your roadmap forward.

Run the protocol. Post your score. Keep one microscopic promise every day for 30 days.

Then come back and tell us what changed.

Mentioned in this episode:

• The dichotomy of control (Epictetus)
• Prosoche: Stoic attentive watchfulness
• Hebbian learning: neurons that fire together, wire together
• Implementation intentions and if-then planning
• Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, Epictetus

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Start your day with a simple gratitude meditation rooted in ancient Stoic wisdom. In just 10 minutes, you'll practice three gratitudes, shift your mindset from lack to abundance, and set yourself up for a day of noticing what's right—not just what's wrong. Inspired by Marcus Aurelius and Seneca, this guided meditation helps you see clearly what you already have, before the day's demands take over. Perfect for mornings when you want to feel grounded, grateful, and ready.

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Start your day with the most powerful Stoic distinction: what is up to you, and what is not.

In this 6-minute guided morning practice, you’ll gently identify a current worry, feel where it lives in your body, and release everything outside your control. Through clear teaching, visualization, and a simple daily intention, you’ll cultivate calm agency and resilience—no matter what the day brings.

Perfect for anyone who wakes up with racing thoughts, anxiety about outcomes, or a desire to respond rather than react. Epictetus’ timeless wisdom, delivered in a modern, practical way.

Return daily to strengthen the habit.

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Martijn Schirp and I have known each other for nearly a decade. He first reached out after reading a meditation article I posted on Reddit—a message that changed my life and eventually led to us co-founding HighExistence and running transformational retreats together in Costa Rica.

Since then, Martijn has lived several lifetimes: professional poker player who finished 102nd at the World Series of Poker, a crisis of meaning in Vegas that led him to a Buddhist monastery in Nepal, and then co-founding Synthesis—one of the first legal psilocybin retreat centers in the world, which partnered with Imperial College London and was called the "gold standard" of psychedelic retreats.

Then it collapsed. In 2023, Synthesis went bankrupt, leaving hundreds of students and employees in limbo. Martijn got physically ill from the stress and spent years recovering—volunteering on a farm in Portugal, working with the soil, reconnecting with his teachers.

Now he's back with something new: Upāyosis and "A Path Between Worlds"—a 12-month program that weaves Buddhist contemplative training with intentional psychedelic practice. It's the first time we've spoken in depth in years, and I was struck by how different he seems. As he told me: "I don't have to seek anymore. I think I've found it. Now it's more a question of deepening."

In this conversation, we discuss:

• The intergenerational trauma he discovered through ayahuasca (tracing back to his grandfather in a German orphanage during WWII)
• Why he believes "the container is the medicine"
• What actually went wrong at Synthesis—and what he learned
• The Buddhist answer to whether psychedelics violate the Fifth Precept
• Why peak experiences aren't enough—and what "altered traits" require
• Animism, ecodelics, and our ethical relationship to non-human beings
• Why spiritual friendship is "the whole of the path"
• What his new 12-month program actually involves

I'm joining this program myself—not just as an endorsement, but because I've seen how thoroughly Martijn creates things, and I want to deepen my own practice. If you're someone who's had meaningful psychedelic experiences but feels stuck, or you're a meditator curious about how these paths might converge, this conversation is for you.

Learn more: upayosis.com

Contact Martijn here.