NOT Episode SIX
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NOT Episode SIX
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Narrated by:
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The espresso is finally brewing. And while it is, something unexpected comes up.
NOT Episode SIX starts with a beeping espresso machine behind a closed bathroom door — and becomes one of the most honest episodes in the series. Derrick traces a lifelong pattern of getting all the way to the edge of something and then stopping. Not because he couldn't. Because he convinced himself it wasn't good enough.
There was the dance scholarship. The studio. The camera. Everything ready — and then he walked away.
He's not walking away this time.
In this not-episode:
- Why he shut the bathroom door to hide the espresso machine — and what that reveals
- How childhood patterns show up in adult creative blocks without us even knowing
- The dance scholarship he was this close to — and why he scrapped it
- Why this podcast exists at 3:54am on May 5th, 2025
The most personal episode yet. And the most necessary.
This Is NOT a PODCAST! is hosted by not-your-host Derrick Yanford — meditation teacher, coach, choreographer, author, and recovering perfectionist. New not-episodes drop every Tuesday. Subscribe on Substack at substack.com/@dureeko
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit dureeko.substack.com