What does it really mean to grieve? Tom Attig, philosopher and author of Seeking Wisdom in Death's Shadows, joins Catherine Cowell to challenge some of the most widely held assumptions about grief and loss.

Drawing on four decades of teaching, writing, and listening, Tom argues that the famous "five stages of grief" simply don't reflect how people actually experience bereavement. Instead, he offers a richer framework: grief as relearning the world — a recognition that when someone dies, the entire fabric of your life is thrown into upheaval, and the work of mourning is finding your way through a landscape that has fundamentally changed.

Tom explores how love doesn't end at death, why grief is rarely something we "finish," and what it means to carry the legacies — practical, soulful, and spiritual — of those we've lost. He also reflects on the book itself: a collection of fourteen essays written over forty years, alongside new writing that traces the arc of his thinking, culminating in reflections on what it means to live well as finite, fragile human beings.

A warm, thoughtful conversation for anyone navigating loss, caring for others who are grieving, or simply asking what makes a life meaningful.

Book: Seeking Wisdom in Death's Shadows by Tom Attig (Oxford University Press) Discount code: AUFLY30 for 30% off at the OUP website

Transcript

Loved Called Gifted Website

Find us on Facebook

If you have comments or would like to get in touch, you can find contact details on the Loved Called Gifted website. It would be great to hear from you.

St. Ignatius of Loyola had a revolutionary effect on the spiritual lives of millions of people. As well as founding the Jesuits, he developed a philosophy and practice of prayer that continues to be helpful to people 500 years later. We look at how he was both similar to and different from his contemporary Martin Luther. And take a look at some of his ideas and methods, such as finding God in all things, Lectio Divina (reading scripture with the heart) and Imaginative Contemplation (engaging with scripture through creative imagination), the examen, colloquy, discernment, the importance of desire and the difference between consolation and desolation. Whether you’re new to Ignatian spirituality or looking to deepen your connection with the divine, this episode offers practical insights and spiritual tools to guide your journey.

Suggested reading:

Landmarks: And Ignatian Journey by Margaret Self

The Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything: A Spirituality for Real Life by James Martin

Transcript

Website - where you can also find contact details, if you would like to get in touch.

Catherine Cowell sits down with Maria Manuela Silva—a spiritual director whose life journey spans cultures, crises, and a profound rediscovery of faith.

Maria shares her story of growing up in Portugal under the fear and restriction of a dictatorship, living through a revolution, discovering faith, and then building a life of ministry and service in the UK. When a series of personal losses brought everything to a halt, Maria found herself at a breaking point—yet somehow still holding onto God.

Maria's is a journey from fear to trust. Through silence, contemplative spirituality, and the simple yet transformative experience of being truly heard, Maria discovers a deeper, more personal connection with God—one rooted not in striving, but in listening, presence, and what she beautifully describes as “the dance” of the divine.

This episode is a gentle, spacious invitation to anyone longing for a more authentic spiritual life. Whether you’re questioning, rebuilding, or simply curious, Maria’s story offers hope, honesty, and a reminder that your own path—your own “dance”—is worth discovering.

You can find a transcript here.

Explore the website - where you can also find out how to get in touch - here.

And you can join our Facebook Page if you like.