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How to Have a Bloody Good Conversation

How to Have a Bloody Good Conversation

By: Sarah Wright & Dr Victoria Stakelum
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If you want to succeed in life, you have to master the art of conversation. From dating to doing business, negotiating a pay rise to haggling over bedtimes, conversations make our world go round. The thing is, most of us were never taught how to have them well. We all learned to talk as toddlers, but mastering conversation that's a different skill entirely, and let’s be honest, most of us are winging it. So if you’ve ever found yourself tongue-tied, lost for words, or dodging a difficult chat, this podcast is for you. Join two curious conversationalists, psychologist and mindset coach Dr Victoria Stakelum and communications consultant Sarah Wright, as we explore how to have a bloody good conversation. It might just change your life. Economics Personal Development Personal Success Social Sciences
Episodes
  • Dating 101: How To Chat Up A Romantic Partner
    Feb 10 2026
    Dating 101: How To Chat Up A Romantic Partner

    If you're dating in 2026 and wondering how to start a conversation, avoid dating fatigue, and actually find someone you're compatible with, this episode is for you.

    Sarah Wright and Dr Victoria Stakelum are joined by Lydia Hoey, matchmaking director at Maclynn International and a science-based dating coach, to talk about how modern dating is changing - including the slightly alarming rise of AI companionship (72% of American teenagers have now interacted with an AI companion, and Meta is building chatbots to fill the ‘romantic gap’) - and what still matters most: real-world connection, values, and the ability to communicate clearly.

    In this episode, we discuss how to approach modern dating with more clarity and less stress: how to define your values (properly, not just picking words), how to choose first-date settings that reduce awkwardness and increase connection, and how to avoid turning a date into an interview. You'll get practical conversation openers to keep things light and engaging, guidance on dating mindset (switching out of "work mode"), and tools for navigating the messy bits - like mixed signals, texting "rules", attachment styles, and how to end things kindly without ghosting.

    Guest

    Lydia Hoey - Matchmaking Director at Maclynn International, and a qualified science-based dating coach and matchmaker. https://maclynninternational.com/

    Contact

    Be part of the conversation. If you have a conversational conundrum or a question, please do get in touch via our email: abloodygoodconversation@gmail.com.

    References

    Attachment styles

    • Psychology Today – Relationship Attachment Style Test (UK): https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/tests/relationships/relationship-attachment-style-test
    • Attachment Project – Attachment Style Quiz: https://www.attachmentproject.com/attachment-style-quiz/

    Love languages

    • The 5 Love Languages® – Official Love Language Quiz: https://5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language

    Communication style

    • Verywell Mind – Communication Style Quiz: https://www.verywellmind.com/take-the-communication-style-quiz-7973143

    36 Questions

    • This site has them all: https://ggia.berkeley.edu/practice/36_questions_for_increasing_closeness

    Films referenced

    • Hitch (2005) – IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0386588/
    • Swingers (1996) – IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117802/
    • When Harry Met Sally... (1989) – IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098635/
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    1 hr and 12 mins
  • Why Good Conversations Feel So Hard Right Now (and what to do about it)
    Jan 13 2026

    Have you noticed that conversations feel more rushed, reactive and emotionally loaded than ever before?

    It’s not just you. That’s why, in this episode, we (that’s communications consultant, Sarah Wright, and psychologist and mindset coach, Dr Victoria Stakelum) explore the real reasons communication has become so challenging: from the speed of modern life to nervous system overload, digital disconnection, and the pressure to respond instantly.

    In this episode, we cover:

    • Why time feels faster and how this impacts the way we think
    • How technology affects our nervous systems and patience
    • Why we’re “connected” but still lonely
    • The one simple shift that instantly improves every conversation
    • How energy, not wording, shapes how you’re received
    • The role of rapport with others and yourself
    • How slowing down can transform conflict, communication, and connection.

    This episode is for anyone who wants calmer, richer, more meaningful conversations at work, at home, and everywhere in between. In it, we reference:

    • The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People — Stephen R. Covey
    • The Trust Technique – www.thetrusttechnique.com
    • Laura Lynne Jackson – ww. lauralynnejackson.com
    • 100 Ways to Raise Your Vibration – Victoria’s pdf can be downloaded here: https://thesuccesssmith.thrivecart.com/100ways

    We’d genuinely love to hear your experiences. Please share what you tried, what shifted, or any questions you’d like us to cover in future episodes by emailing abloodygoodconversation@gmail.com.

    Enjoy the episode.

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    1 hr
  • Series 2 Trailer
    Jan 1 2026
    Master the art of conversation, and you’ll transform your life.

    From dating to doing business, negotiating a pay rise to haggling over bedtimes, conversations shape everything: your career, your connections, your confidence. But while we all learned to talk as toddlers, no one really taught us how to have good conversations, the kind where you feel heard, understood, and genuinely connected.

    If you’ve ever found yourself:

      • tongue-tied in a difficult conversation
      • replaying an argument in your head for days
      • dodging tricky chats at work or at home
      • stuck in small talk when you want something deeper

    …this podcast is for you.

    Why this podcast matters now

    We’re living in a time of constant connection and growing disconnection. Research shows that:

    • Around half of UK adults report feeling lonely, even when surrounded by others
    • Only a small proportion of our daily conversations are truly meaningful, most are just logistics and small talk
    • Smartphones and screens are eroding our face-to-face communication skills and attention.

    School taught us how to perform and achieve. It didn’t teach us how to listen, how to disagree well, how to set boundaries, or how to talk about things that really matter. Culture often treats conversation as polite chit-chat or intellectual debate, not as a tool for emotional connection, repair, and understanding.

    This podcast exists to change that.

    Meet your hosts

    Join two curious conversationalists:

    • Dr Victoria Stakelum – psychologist and mindset coach, specialising in the subconscious mind, emotions, and how we relate to ourselves and others
    • Sarah Wright – communications consultant, creative strategist, and conversation curator

    Together, they explore how to have a bloody good conversation, at work, at home, in relationships, and in all those moments we’d secretly rather avoid.

    The topic of conversation

    In Series 1, Sarah and seasoned journalist Mai Davies explored the art of conversation, including:

    • When and how to use humour in conversation
    • How to handle conflict effectively (without burning bridges
    • How to listen so people feel truly heard
    • How to read a room and pick your moment
    • How to talk about things that matter – from work disagreements and family tensions to death, cultural identity, and negotiating under pressure.

    Now, previous guest, Dr Victoria Stakelum, joins as co-host to give a different perspective using her experience drawn from her corporate life running million-pound businesses and current occupation as psychologist and mindset coach. Through real-life examples and practical tools, she shares why:

    • Self-awareness is the foundation of every bloody good conversation
    • Curiosity and empathy – stepping into someone else’s shoes – are non-negotiable
    • Better conversations don’t start with control; they start with noticing your own reactions, regulating your energy, and staying calm under pressure

    Why conversation skills matter

    Conversation is something we do together. The best conversations happen when both people feel safe, equipped, and able to bring their full selves to the table.

    When we lose the art of conversation, we all lose: misunderstandings grow, resentment builds, and we drift further away from the people who matter most.

    This podcast was created to help us all:

    • have better, braver conversations
    • navigate conflict and difference with more confidence
    • end conversations in a way that feels good for everyone – heard, understood, and genuinely connected.

    If you’re looking for a conversation skills podcast that’s practical, warm, honest, and real, hit follow and join us as we learn the art of meaningful dialogue – one bloody good conversation at a time.

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    1 min
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