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How Not to Screw Up Your Kids

How Not to Screw Up Your Kids

By: Dr Maryhan
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About this listen

Hello, I'm psychologist and parenting expert Dr Maryhan and this is How Not To Screw Up Your Kids, the podcast for parents, grandparents, educators, and anyone else who wants to be part of a movement to raise confident children who grow up believing in themselves.


Follow now for twice weekly episodes - on Monday's you'll find shorter Bucket Emptying episodes, with longer episodes each Thursday.


The greatest gift we can give our children is self-belief. It will get them further in life than any qualification and is absolutely possible for each and every child; we just need the right information and support around us to teach them.


The old saying ‘it takes a village to raise a child” couldn’t be more true than now. Parenting has got a whole lot harder; not just because we are busier than ever but because our children are growing up in an ever changing, fast-paced world, which is so different to the one we grew up in. Our children have more pressure to be better, look better, do better, and in a world where lives are so publicly scrutinised and commented on through social media it’s really no wonder we’re seeing mental health problems sky rocketing amongst children, teens, and young adults. What you can expect from this podcast are honest conversations about parenting.


We’ll talk confidence resilience, anxiety, managing tech, and all the topics you’d expect as well blowing the lid off the widely help misconception that children are innately resilient. They’re not!


This podcast is for people who want to get real about parenting. You understand it can get messy sometimes and aren’t afraid to admit it. I have had more than my fair share of messy and I will no doubt share these with you along the way. I won’t dress things up but I will always give you something practical to take away and use in each and every episode. My guests and experts will be real people who have overcome their own adversities and bring with them a message to us as parents, as well as inspiring stories.


So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation...


We'd love to hear from you!


We want to hear what you love and what you don't love about the podcast, so we can keep making it better: https://podcastsurvey.typeform.com/to/SEyYrxGB

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dr Maryhan Parenting & Families Relationships Science
Episodes
  • A new perspective on emotional co-regulation

    A new perspective on emotional co-regulation
    Feb 2 2026

    In this bucket emptying episode, I look a bit closer at my conversation with Professor Sam Wass, who you may recognise from such TV shows as The Secret Life of 4 Year Olds. He is is currently Director of the Institute for the Science of Early Years at the University of East London.


    In last week’s interview he spoke to us at length about his research, but in today’s episode I want to drill down just a little more into some of his comments on emotional coregulation, and I’m going to share my own thoughts and some useful tips which you can put into action right away.


    So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…



    More about Sam and his work:

    Website: https://www.profsamwass.com/

    Useful research: https://www.profsamwass.com/tweet-threads/

    Institute for the Science & Early Years of Youth: https://www.isey.org/ct-for-ey-and-schools


    Highlights from this episode:

    01:25 - Sam Wass on emotional coregulation

    07:00 - Stress contagion

    11:17 - Matching our children’s state

    14:24 - Meet them where they’re at



    💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together


    💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/


    💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library


    💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025


    💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com



    DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
    Show More Show Less
    18 mins
  • Neuroscience and Emotional Regulation in Children, with Professor Sam Wass

    Neuroscience and Emotional Regulation in Children, with Professor Sam Wass
    Jan 29 2026

    Does your child ever get worked up, and you find it escalates super fast but feel powerless to bring them down from that ledge?


    Every parent has been there, but it’s only in recent years that we have really begun to understand the reasons why, and it’s all about neuroscience.


    Children’s brains are changing and developing all the time, which means as parents it can be so difficult to keep up, and know how to support them with things like emotional regulation, so I want to talk though some of these challenges and give you some practical advice that I hope will help you and your family.


    To have this conversation I am joined by Professor Sam Wass, who you may recognise from such TV shows as The Secret Life of 4 Year Olds. He is is currently Director of the Institute for the Science of Early Years at the University of East London, and shares some of his expertise, to help us all understand some of the science behind emotional regulation.


    So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…



    More about Sam and his work:

    Website: https://www.profsamwass.com/

    Useful research: https://www.profsamwass.com/tweet-threads/

    Institute for the Science & Early Years of Youth: https://www.isey.org/ct-for-ey-and-schools


    Highlights from this episode:

    04:10 - Measuring brain stem activity

    08:08 - Nature versus nurture

    13:18 - Panic disorders

    17:20 - Long term effects of children in high stress states

    21:23 - Brain stem arousal is trending up

    25:29 - You’re only still when you’re dead

    31:25 - Children hate broccoli because of science

    35:18 - We’re going on a bear hunt

    42:33 - Quadrants

    48:00 - Mums and dads play differently

    53:29 - Co-regulating

    59:14 - Stress contagion



    💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together


    💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/


    💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library


    💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025


    💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com



    DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
    Show More Show Less
    1 hr and 4 mins
  • Stop Making Life Easy! 5 Proven Ways to Build Your Child's Resilience

    Stop Making Life Easy! 5 Proven Ways to Build Your Child's Resilience
    Jan 26 2026

    “I can’t do it!” - as parents we hear this all the time.


    Our children are learning new skills and experiencing new things every day, which means they are always facing things they’ve never done before. This can be scary, and often our kids might think they can’t do it or they’re not good enough.


    That’s why building resilience is so important. It gives them the foundation they need to persevere, to fail without fear, and to find that inner strength when things feel tough or challenging.


    In today’s bucket emptying I’m going to share five things you can do to create that shift, and help to build that resilience. And the best part: these are things you can start doing right now.


    So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…



    Highlights from this episode:

    01:49 - Non-friction

    06:23 - Modelling resilience

    08:19 - Curated friction

    10:20 - Boredom please

    12:44 - Conflict is friction

    14:16 - Don’t rush in to fix setbacks


    💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together


    💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/


    💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library


    💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025


    💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com



    DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
    Show More Show Less
    19 mins
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