How Inner Work Changes the Way We Love with Laurie Proctor cover art

How Inner Work Changes the Way We Love with Laurie Proctor

How Inner Work Changes the Way We Love with Laurie Proctor

Listen for free

View show details

About this listen

In this episode, host Patria Rector sits down with coach, IFS practitioner, and Enneagram instructor Laurie Proctor for a thoughtful conversation about how inner work reshapes the way we experience love.

Love is often talked about as a feeling, a virtue, or an ideal. But in real life, love is shaped by the stories we carry, the wounds we’ve endured, and the nervous systems we inhabit. When those stories remain unexamined, love often operates through survival patterns—control, withdrawal, reactivity, or collapse. Together, Patria and Laurie explore a different possibility: love that grows from integration.

Drawing from Internal Family Systems, the Enneagram, and decades of personal and professional experience, they discuss how healing our inner world changes the way we show up in relationships. Instead of trying to perfect ourselves, the invitation is to become more aware, more compassionate toward our own parts, and more grounded in what IFS calls self-energy—the calm, curious, compassionate center within us. This conversation opens a space for listeners to consider how their own history, patterns, and nervous system responses influence the way they give and receive love.

In this episode, we explore
  • Why love often becomes distorted by survival patterns
  • How trauma and nervous system responses shape relationships
  • The role of Internal Family Systems and “parts” language
  • What self-energy looks like in everyday life
  • Why integration—not perfection—leads to healthier connection
  • How untended pain eventually seeks expression
A question to reflect on
When relationships feel tense or unsafe, what response tends to take the lead for you—control, withdrawal, reactivity, or collapse? Sometimes the first step toward healing is simply noticing.

About the Guest
Laurie Proctor is a professionally certified coach, Internal Family Systems practitioner, Human Design coach, and certified Enneagram instructor who partners with individuals, teams, and organizations seeking healing and transformation. She is the founder of Sow That (Self Others World), where her work centers on the belief that healing begins within and ripples outward to others and the world. Laurie holds multiple certificates in narrative-focused trauma care from The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology and is passionate about helping people discover the treasures within that can change their lives—and the world.

Learn more about her work at sowthat.com.

If this episode resonates with you, follow or subscribe to Echoes and Edges on your favorite podcast platform, leave a five-star review, and share with a friend who might need a gentle invitation to self-understanding.

Connect With Patria
Facebook
Instagram
The Broken & Beautiful Website

Credits:
Echoes and Edges is Produced and Edited by: Stephen R. Sanders
Music Promoted by Envato
Echoes and Edges is a part of VividLivid Podcast Network - Where bruises speak and healing finds its voice.
No reviews yet