Why does desire seem to disappear in midlife… even in loving relationships?

In this episode, Kat and Tori are joined by Dr. Juls—therapist, professor, and intimacy expert for women over 50—to unpack what’s really going on beneath the surface.

We talk about why it’s not just hormones, how stress and nervous system burnout impact desire, and why common advice like “just schedule it” can actually make things worse.

Dr. Juls shares a powerful reframe—your body isn’t broken, it’s protecting you—and walks us through a simple, practical pathway back to connection: regulate, reconnect, and reawaken.

If you’ve been feeling disconnected from your desire, this episode will help you understand why—and remind you that it’s not too late.

To find out more about Dr Juls and where to get a copy of her book "Are we gonna have sex or what? " head to https://www.juliemerrimanphd.com/

In this short and sweet episode, Tori and Kat get real about the "toxic sludge" of doomscrolling and the unique challenge of being the "sandwich generation". The heart of today’s chat is how to stay informed without losing your mind as we navigate global conflicts and rising living costs. The ladies explain that your nervous system treats a news notification like a tiger in the room, and while "witnessing guilt" is real, your high blood pressure doesn't actually lower fuel costs or bring world peace. Grab a herbal tea—or maybe a wine if your cortisol is already hitting the ceiling, sit back, relax and enjoy!

In this episode of Hot Flush Happy Hour, Kat and Tori are joined by their lovely friend Lou Rubie, a trauma-aware counsellor and somatic practitioner . Together they explore a whole-person approach to menopause—and why learning to work with your body can change everything.

Lou shares her own experience navigating menopause after a hysterectomy, including the shock of being diagnosed with osteoporosis despite living a really healthy, active lifestyle. It’s such a powerful reminder that there’s a lot going on during this phase that we don’t always see.

We get into how menopause is about so much more than just hormones, how it can affect your nervous system in ways you might not expect, and why so many women end up feeling like they’re not quite themselves.

This conversation is really an invitation to slow down, tune in, and start listening to your body in a different way.

Because maybe it’s not about pushing through…
Maybe it’s about learning to work with your body instead.

So grab your favourite beverage and join us for an informative, feel-good chat—full of laughs and the beautiful warmth of the lovely Lou.

Lou's business details:

Fig Counselling

https://figcounselling.com.au/

Grounding meditation: https://figcounselling.com.au/inner-resource/