Episode 23 — Wake Up, Guys: A National Conversation on Men's Mental Health

Doug and Ian open with gardening-as-therapy talk and a comedy show gone sideways before diving into the heart of the episode: a real conversation about men's mental health, masculinity, and why so many men wait until they're drowning to ask for help. Along the way they touch on community, self-awareness, and the small moments — a sauna conversation, a friend's "I love you" — that say more about connection than people expect.

Inspired by CBC's The Current and host Matt Galloway's segment on the federal government's new national strategy for men's health, Doug and Ian unpack toxic masculinity, vulnerability as actual strength, and why "I love you, man" might be the most important thing you say to a friend this year.

In this episode:

• The therapeutic benefits of gardening and connecting with nature, plus surviving the seasonal "thaw"
• A sauna-comedy-show story that did not land
• Doug on his friend Rory Scovel, currently out on the "Know Your Enemy" tour
• The real conversation: toxic masculinity, embracing vulnerability, and Doug's "Alone" TV show monologue
• Value-based parenting and the "rhinoceros in the room" anxiety metaphor
• Why a friend saying "I love you" over car-buying advice hit different
• Sauna Stories: lacrosse kids, felony resumes, and trades culture
• Which Side of the Border: pharmacy body cams, hot glue thieves, and Gordie the dog

Referenced this episode:

• The Current (CBC) — "A 'national conversation' about men's health," hosted by Matt Galloway (March 4, 2026)
• Rory Scovel — comedian, Religion, Sex, and a Few Things in Between (HBO), currently on the "Know Your Enemy" tour (roryscovel.com)
• NY Post — Walgreens body cam pilot program in NYC stores (March 5, 2026)
• Vancouver Police — hot glue break-in targeting method (March 2026)
• The Dodo — Gordie the dog's rescue from the Detroit River, near the Gordie Howe International Bridge
• NY Post / amNewYork — "Sauna Comedy" at Othership Flatiron, NYC, a concept that started in Toronto in 2022 (November 2025)

Got an article, a men's mental health story, or your own sauna story? Send it our way — we might read it on the show: hitylpodcast@gmail.com

Topics: mental health · masculinity · comedy · gardening · societal issues · sauna stories · self-awareness · community · personal growth

Vans and Owls

Lately, I've Been Thinking — a solo series from Have I Told You Lately

Welcome to a new kind of episode of Have I Told You Lately! Doug's not here for this one — Ian's flying solo to kick off "Lately I've Been Thinking," where he takes one story from his life and follows it until it teaches him something.

This time it's about a minivan. Not a cool one — no Mustang, no lifted truck, just a Toronto family's "second apartment on wheels" that got sold so they could spend a year car-free. Ian gets into what it's like cleaning out a van full of a decade of fatherhood (mystery socks, old fries, a toy nobody remembers losing), what a car quietly does to your sense of identity and protection as a man, and how the street treats you differently depending on whether you're inside a car or out in the world on a bike, a bus, or your own two feet. Somewhere in there: owls. Actual owls.

It's not a "cars are bad" episode. It's a "we stepped outside the default for a year and it changed how we move through the city" episode. Doug and Ian will be back together at the end of the month — until then, enjoy the solo ride.

Keywords: urban planning, car-free, community, city streets, transportation, personal growth, urban life, mobility, city design, lifestyle change

Key Topics:

• The influence of cars on personal identity and city design
• The emotional and social significance of vehicles
• The impact of default transportation choices on urban life
• The benefits and challenges of living car-free for a year
• How walking and public transit foster community and awareness

Guest: None — solo episode

Sound Bites:

• "Convenience doesn't feel like control — until you realize it's been choosing for you."
• "The car wasn't just moving my family around. It was making our decisions."
• "When you see differently, you start to live differently."

Chapters:

• 00:00 — Introduction to a Solo Journey
• 02:27 — The Minivan Experience
• 07:01 — The Complexity of Car Ownership
• 11:48 — Identity and Public Space
• 16:36 — Discovering the City Without a Car
• 20:39 — Reflections on Convenience and Connection
• 27:08 — Outro

Resources:

• Not Just Bikes (YouTube) — https://www.youtube.com/@NotJustBikes
• CityNerd (YouTube) — https://www.youtube.com/@CityNerd
• The War on Cars (podcast) — https://thewaroncars.org
• Wheel and Beyond (Ben Durham) — https://youtu.be/CT642kdP74o?si=lTwVM8cnXQoZ62pP

Happy Black History Month!

Here's a look inside of this episode:

The Check In: The fellas discuss New Year's Resolutions. Doug talks about 'moving his balls,' whatever that means and Ian talks about the benefit of setting daily intentions. The guys discuss whether or not the Winter Olympics is 'White People Stuff' or more of a geographic tradition. They wrap up this segment discussing the power of writing things down.

Outro: Ian plays a very special recording of "Lift Every Voice & Sing" sung by none other than his daughter.

Till Death Do Us DIY: In one of Ian's latest segments, he reads a story of a couple in the midst of a renovation project and the fellas discuss whether or not the couple's relationship will survive the project.

Nobody Told Me: In our second addition of this segment, the guys offer elder words of wisdom to the youth of the world.

Which Side Of The Border: Everyone's favorite podcast gameshow where the fellas, mostly Doug, have to decide whether the crazy story they've just heard took place in Canada or the US