Greta Gerwig’s 2019 adaptation of LITTLE WOMEN is one of Marin’s all-time favorite films, while this was Maggie’s first time watching it. We praise Gerwig’s unique screenplay and meticulous blocking, debate if Amy’s character is redeemable in this version, agree that Beth is actually the best March sister, and both almost cry on mic because this film is so moving. (There’s also an extended prologue about our current Botox/filler epidemic and Kim Kardashian’s acting career, so buckle up.)

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Secondary texts referenced:

Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

Little Women (1994) dir. Gillian Armstrong

This Halloween we’re delving into a horror we like to call “marrying a hot stranger who’s a walking red flag.” Guillermo del Toro’s gothic-horror melodrama CRIMSON PEAK was a formative theater-going experience for teenage Marin and a decade later she’s happy to report that it still rules. We have a lot to say about its pulpiness, violence, and romance, plus some tangents about Ryan Murphy and Charlie Hunnam.

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Secondary texts referenced:

Hereditary (2018) dir. Ari Aster

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë

Longlegs (2024) dir. Osgood Perkins

Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

Sometimes a movie just gets that an integral part of teenage girldom is being mean to your mom after she’s nice to you! Hence our fervent praise for Shuchi Talati’s GIRLS WILL BE GIRLS (2024), which is a nuanced and detailed story about a mother-daughter relationship in flux.

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Secondary texts referenced:

Make-Up (2019) dir. Claire Oakley

Portrait of A Lady on Fire (2019) dir. Celine Sciamma

The Starling Girl (2023) dir. Laurel Parmet

Today we’re discussing a formative text from Marin’s childhood/Girl Scout days: TROOP BEVERLY HILLS (1989). This movie was critically shredded upon release—mostly due to its humane depiction of the upper class—and, well, do we have a newsflash for the critics of 1989: the rich characters in this movie are nothing compared to the 1% ruining everyone’s lives in 2025! We also have a lot to say about expressions of femininity, queer coding, the trad wife movement, and professional critics slinging ad hominem attacks against child actors.

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More like “my ass is crying”! We’re talking about Megan Park’s charming, wise, and slightly fantastical coming-of-age film MY OLD ASS (2024), which we wholeheartedly recommend you watch.

If you have arrived at the ARRIVAL SPOILER WARNING, skip to 41:45.

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Secondary texts referenced:

Rabbit Hole (2010) dir. John Cameron Mitchell

Arrival (2016) dir. Denis Villeneuve

We’re cleansing our hearts and brains this week by discussing a very good movie with real, human stakes! What a relief. Gina Prince-Bythewood’s LOVE & BASKETBALL (2000) has us cheering, laughing, and appreciating the beauty of sports despite our own personal lack of athletic prowess. Do we question if the male lead proves himself to be a worthy romantic partner? Sure, but those reservations are also connected to the film’s thoughtful portrayal of ambition and its evolving nature. We also appreciate any movie which gives us the opportunity to consider the weird cultural legacy of Tyra Banks.

Special thanks to Jess for providing this episode’s Juvenalia Encore <3

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Secondary texts referenced:

There’s Always This Year: On Basketball and Ascension by Hanif Abdurraqib

Well, if you ever wanted to hear a 2-hour-ish rumination on the confusing and contradictory sexual politics of THE TWILIGHT SAGA, you’re in luck. How does this series feel like an obvious metaphor for Christian purity culture while also having no sense of its own metaphorical resonance? What does Renesmee’s “miraculous” conception say about the films’ attitudes towards sex? Is it possible to tell a compelling story about a human-vampire romance if that story is solely in service to a stereotypical “happily-ever-after”? It’s a minefield! At least the Volturi are fun.

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Secondary texts referenced:

Beauty and the Beast (1991) dirs. Gary Trousdale and Kirk Wise

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (season 2, episodes 13, 14, and 22)

The Gospel of Mary Magdalene, translated by Jean-Yves Leloup, foreword by Jacob Needleman

It’s finally time to discuss what might be the most lovably hated movie franchise ever: THE TWILIGHT SAGA. In this episode, which covers the first three films in the series, topics of discussion include: the chaotic aesthetics of the late 2000s, chosen one narratives, cultural appropriation, the false allures of choice feminism, and why 12-year-old Marin was a Twilight book purist who rejected these movies altogether. (We also talk at length about the 2010 Robert Pattinson vehicle REMEMBER ME, so if you don’t want to know about its baffling plot twist, avoid 39:44 to 46:21).

Special thanks to Lindsey for providing this episode’s Juvenalia Encore!

Secondary texts referenced:

Adventureland (2009) dir. Greg Mottola

Remember Me (2010) dir. Allen Coulter

Good Will Hunting (1997) dir. Gus Van Sant

“No, feminism is not about choice” by Meagan Tyler (published in The Conversation)