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Five Year You

Five Year You

By: Andrew Dewar and Catherine Collins
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Welcome to "Five Year You," the podcast that takes you on a transformative journey toward your future self. Join us as we explore the power of self-improvement, tackling challenges, setting goals, and unleashing the potential within you. Our conversations are raw, real, and relatable, offering practical tips and insights to empower you in your growth. Each episode offers useful tips to help you become the person you aspire to be. Tune in, invest in yourself, and let's embark on this adventure together! Get ready for a unique and personal exploration of the honest and relatable moments that will shape the next chapter of your story. In each episode, we dive into the day-to-day experiences that make up the mosaic of your life over the next five years. From the small victories to the inevitable challenges, "Five Year You" captures the essence of the ordinary and extraordinary moments that contribute to your personal growth. Our tagline, "Raw, Real, Relatable," perfectly encapsulates the authenticity of the stories we share. No glossy highlights, just the unfiltered reality of navigating the twists and turns of everyday life. Join us as we connect with individuals from various walks of life who openly share their aspirations, setbacks, and the unexpected surprises that come with each passing day. Whether you're facing career crossroads, building relationships, or discovering new passions, "Five Year You" is here to provide a real-time reflection on the shared human experience. Tune in for a daily dose of inspiration, motivation, and a reminder that you're not alone on this journey.©Five Year You Hygiene & Healthy Living Personal Development Personal Success Psychology Psychology & Mental Health
Episodes
  • Encore: The Rules Are Fake

    Encore: The Rules Are Fake
    Oct 28 2026
    Ready to go deeper? Work with me here:https://fiveyearyou.com/coaching/If you’ve been living by rules you never consciously chose… like there’s a “right” way to build a career, relationship, family, or life… like breaking from expectations would make you selfish or irresponsible—this episode is for you.Because here’s the truth:Many of the rules shaping your life are not universal truths.And more importantly… you are allowed to question anything that keeps you from living authentically.💭 What This Episode CoversHow invisible rules shape your choices and identityWhy societal expectations can feel impossible to challengeThe difference between a useful guideline and a limiting beliefHow fear of judgment keeps you following paths you have outgrownWhy questioning the rules is an important part of self-discoveryPractical ways to build a life that reflects your own values🚨 Why the Rules Feel So RealYou Learned Them EarlyMany rules were taught to you before you were old enough to question them.Work hard.Be agreeable.Choose the safe path.Do not disappoint anyone.Follow the timeline.👉 Result: Other people’s expectations begin to feel like facts.Belonging Feels Safer Than AuthenticityFollowing the rules can earn approval and help you feel accepted.Choosing differently may bring judgment, confusion, or criticism.👉 Result: You trade parts of yourself for the comfort of fitting in.Everyone Else Seems to Be Following ThemWhen the people around you pursue the same milestones, it can seem like there is only one correct way to live.You may assume that questioning the path means something is wrong with you.👉 Result: Familiarity gets mistaken for truth.Rules Reduce UncertaintyA prescribed path can make life feel predictable.It gives you steps to follow and milestones to measure.But certainty can become a cage when the path no longer fits.👉 Result: You stay committed to a life that feels safe but unfulfilling.😞 The Emotional Cost of Following Fake RulesWhen you believe you must live according to someone else’s standards, it creates:PressureShameResentmentSelf-doubtDisconnectionFear of making mistakesYou may keep achieving goals that do not satisfy you.You may silence your own desires because they seem impractical or unacceptable.You may feel guilty for wanting a life that looks different.And the worst part?👉 You can become incredibly successful at living a life you never truly chose.⚠️ The Hidden DangerUnquestioned rules can lead you into decisions based on fear, approval, and obligation.Examples:Staying in a career because changing direction seems irresponsibleFollowing a relationship timeline that does not feel rightBelieving rest must be earned through exhaustionHiding parts of yourself to remain acceptedMeasuring success through status instead of fulfillmentSaying yes because “that’s just what people do”👉 A rule does not deserve control over your life simply because it has existed for a long time.🔑 The Truth You Need to HearYou are allowed to question the script.You are allowed to choose differently.You are allowed to disappoint expectations that were never aligned with you.There is no universal timelineSuccess does not have one definitionProductivity does not determine your worthYou do not need permission to changeA meaningful life may look unconventionalYou are not here to become the most acceptable version of yourself.👉 You are here to become the most honest one.🔄 What Questioning the Rules Actually MeansQuestioning the rules does not mean rejecting every responsibility or boundary.It means becoming conscious.It means asking why you believe what you believe.It means separating what genuinely matters from what you have simply inherited.Some rules may still serve you.Others may be ready to be released.👉 Questioning the script is the beginning of writing your own.🛠️ How to Shift Out of the “I Have To” MindsetNotice the “Shoulds”Pay attention whenever you think:“I should be further ahead.”“I have to do it this way.”“People like me are supposed to want this.”Then ask:Who taught me this rule?Do I still believe it?Separate Values from ExpectationsA value is something that genuinely matters to you.An expectation is something you believe you must satisfy.Ask yourself:Am I choosing this because it feels meaningful?Or because I am afraid of what people will think?👉 Alignment begins when your values become louder than outside approval.Imagine There Were No RulesAsk yourself:What would I choose if no one judged me?What would success look like if I could define it myself?What would I stop doing?What would I finally begin?Let your honest answers reveal what has been buried beneath obligation.Break One Small RuleStart with something manageable.Rest before everything is finished.Say no without a long explanation.Change a routine.Admit that you want something different.👉 Every small act of authenticity strengthens your trust in ...
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    27 mins
  • Encore: How To Make Friends As Adults

    Encore: How To Make Friends As Adults
    Oct 21 2026
    Ready to go deeper? Work with me here:https://fiveyearyou.com/coaching/If you’ve been feeling lonely even though you’re surrounded by people… like making friends used to feel easier… like you want deeper connections but don’t know where to begin—this episode is for you.Because here’s the truth:Making friends as an adult can be hard.And more importantly… needing connection does not mean there is something wrong with you.💭 What This Episode CoversWhy adult friendships can feel harder to build and maintainHow busy schedules and changing life stages affect connectionWhy vulnerability is essential for deeper friendshipsHow fear of rejection keeps people from reaching outPractical ways to meet new people and strengthen existing relationshipsWhy meaningful friendship requires intention, consistency, and courage🚨 Why Making Friends as an Adult Feels So HardLife Is Less StructuredWhen you were younger, school, activities, and shared routines naturally placed you around the same people.As an adult, connection often requires more planning and effort.👉 Result: Friendship stops happening automatically and becomes something you have to create intentionally.Everyone Is BusyCareers, relationships, family responsibilities, and personal challenges can make it difficult to find time for friendship.A delayed reply or cancelled plan may feel personal, even when someone is simply overwhelmed.👉 Result: People who want connection can still struggle to make space for it.Rejection Feels RiskyReaching out requires vulnerability.You may worry that someone already has enough friends, will not respond, or will not feel the same connection.👉 Result: You wait for others to make the first move—and they may be waiting too.You Expect Instant ClosenessDeep friendship usually develops through repeated moments of trust, openness, and shared experience.When a new connection feels awkward or slow, you may assume it is not working.👉 Result: You give up before the friendship has time to grow.😞 The Emotional Cost of Adult LonelinessWhen you believe friendship should be easier, it creates:IsolationSelf-doubtSadnessShameSocial anxietyDisconnectionYou may wonder whether people truly like you.You may compare your life to people who seem surrounded by close friends.You may convince yourself that everyone already belongs somewhere except you.And the worst part?👉 Loneliness can make you withdraw from the very connection you need.⚠️ The Hidden DangerWhen loneliness turns into hopelessness, it can lead you toward choices that deepen the disconnection.Examples:Declining invitations because you feel awkwardWaiting for people to reach out instead of initiatingStaying in one-sided friendships because you fear having no oneAssuming silence means rejectionHiding your real personality to seem more acceptableExpecting one person to meet every emotional need👉 Protecting yourself from rejection can also protect you from belonging.🔑 The Truth You Need to HearYou are not too old to make new friends.You are not unlikable because connection takes time.You are not the only person who feels lonely.Friendship can begin in any seasonAwkwardness is part of getting to know someoneReaching out is an act of courageConsistency matters more than instant chemistryThe right friendships allow you to be yourself👉 You do not need everyone to choose you—you need a few people willing to meet you with honesty and care.🔄 What Wanting More Friendship Actually MeansWanting deeper friendships does not mean your life is empty.It may mean you are ready for more connection.More honesty.More laughter.More support.More people with whom you can share the ordinary parts of life.Loneliness is not proof that you are failing.It is information about something your heart needs.👉 The desire for friendship can be the beginning of creating real belonging.🛠️ How to Shift Out of the “Making Friends Is Impossible” MindsetGo Where Connection Can RepeatFriendships grow through familiarity.Join a class, group, community, volunteer opportunity, or regular activity where you can see the same people more than once.Repeated contact gives connection time to develop naturally.Make the First MoveSend the message.Suggest coffee.Invite someone for a walk.Say:“I’ve enjoyed talking with you. Would you like to get together sometime?”👉 Someone has to take the first step—and it is okay if that person is you.Be Genuinely CuriousAsk thoughtful questions and listen to the answers.Pay attention to what someone cares about.Follow up on the details they share.Feeling remembered is one of the ways people begin to feel valued.Let Yourself Be KnownYou do not have to share everything immediately.But connection deepens when you offer something real.Share an honest opinion.Admit when you are nervous.Talk about something meaningful to you.👉 Friendship grows when two people gradually stop performing.Stay Consistent Without Forcing ItCheck in.Follow ...
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    29 mins
  • Encore: Reclaiming Your Power

    Encore: Reclaiming Your Power
    Oct 14 2026
    Ready to go deeper? Work with me here:https://fiveyearyou.com/coaching/If you’ve been feeling powerless in your own life… like other people’s opinions are shaping your choices… like you’ve lost touch with your voice, confidence, or sense of direction—this episode is for you.Because here’s the truth:Your power was never truly gone.And more importantly… reclaiming it begins with remembering that you still have choices.💭 What This Episode CoversHow personal power gets handed over to other peopleWhy fear, guilt, and approval-seeking keep you stuckThe difference between control and true empowermentHow boundaries help you rebuild self-trustWhy taking responsibility can feel freeing instead of shamefulPractical ways to reconnect with your voice and make aligned choices🚨 Why You Feel PowerlessYou Learned to Seek PermissionYou may have learned to look outside yourself for approval before making decisions.Over time, other people’s opinions can become louder than your own inner knowing.👉 Result: You stop asking what you want and start asking what will keep everyone else comfortable.You Confuse Power with ControlPersonal power is not about controlling people, outcomes, or circumstances.It is about recognizing what belongs to you: your choices, boundaries, responses, and direction.👉 Result: When you cannot control the situation, you may assume you have no power at all.Fear Makes the DecisionsFear of failure, rejection, conflict, or disappointment can keep you from acting.You may wait until you feel completely confident before moving forward.👉 Result: Your life remains shaped by what you are afraid of instead of what matters to you.You Carry Responsibility That Is Not YoursYou may feel responsible for how everyone else feels.You try to prevent disappointment, fix conflict, and manage reactions before they happen.👉 Result: You abandon yourself while trying to keep everyone else emotionally comfortable.😞 The Emotional Cost of Giving Your Power AwayWhen you believe other people have more authority over your life than you do, it creates:ResentmentAnxietySelf-doubtHelplessnessFrustrationDisconnection from yourselfYou may stop trusting your instincts.You may feel angry with others while continuing to give them control over your choices.You may wait for someone else to change before allowing yourself to move forward.And the worst part?👉 You can become a passenger in a life that was meant to belong to you.⚠️ The Hidden DangerWhen you feel powerless, you may make choices that keep you disconnected from yourself.Examples:Saying yes when you want to say noStaying silent to avoid conflictLetting criticism determine your worthWaiting for closure before allowing yourself to healBlaming circumstances without looking for your next available choiceRemaining in relationships or situations that repeatedly diminish you👉 Giving your power away can feel safer in the moment, but it slowly costs you your freedom.🔑 The Truth You Need to HearYou are allowed to choose yourself.You are allowed to change your mind.You are allowed to disappoint people who benefited from your lack of boundaries.Your voice mattersYour needs matterYour choices matterYour past does not own your futureYou do not need permission to become who you areReclaiming your power does not require becoming harder.👉 It means becoming more honest about what is yours to choose.🔄 What Reclaiming Your Power Actually MeansReclaiming your power is not about winning every argument.It is not about controlling the outcome.It is not about pretending difficult circumstances do not exist.It means recognizing where you still have agency.It means trusting yourself enough to make a decision.It means taking responsibility for your next step without blaming yourself for everything that happened before.👉 Your power returns every time you choose alignment over fear.🛠️ How to Shift Out of the “Powerless” MindsetIdentify Where You Gave Your Power AwayAsk yourself:Whose approval am I waiting for?Where am I staying silent?What decision am I avoiding because someone may not understand?Awareness helps you see where your choices have been shaped by fear.Focus on What Is YoursSeparate what you can control from what you cannot.You cannot control another person’s reaction.You can control what you communicate.You cannot rewrite the past.You can choose what happens next.👉 Power grows when you stop fighting what is not yours and act on what is.Practice Making Small DecisionsRebuilding self-trust does not require one dramatic move.Choose the restaurant.State your preference.Decline something that drains you.Follow through on one promise to yourself.Every small decision reminds you that your voice matters.Set a Clear BoundaryBoundaries are one of the clearest ways to reclaim your power.You might say:“That does not work for me.”“I need time to think.”“I am not available for that.”“I understand your feelings, but this is still...
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    29 mins
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