“Get out of your comfort zone” sounds inspiring until it lands your kid in full panic. We sit down with Lorraine Connell, TEDx speaker, author, and founder of Peers, Not Fears and the Speak Boldly Showcase, to talk about a more realistic way to build confidence and communication skills in kids and teens without pushing them past their edge.

We break down Lorraine’s three-circle model of the comfort zone, the challenge zone (growth zone), and the panic zone, plus what panic can look like in real life: shutting down, avoiding, hiding, or snapping in anger. From there, we get practical. Lorraine shares how she uses simple games to help students take safe risks, reflect on what worked, and discover that confidence is something you can practice into existence. We also talk about how the same task changes difficulty depending on the environment, and how parents can “scale” challenges so kids keep moving forward.

You’ll leave with concrete parenting strategies like giving your family a shared language for anxiety, building small daily reps (ordering food, asking a question in a store, starting a conversation), and using conversation starters to prepare for stressful moments like a new school lunchroom. Lorraine also explains tools from her workbook, including values work, scripts for difficult conversations, and a relationship web that helps kids see which friendships feel balanced and which ones drain them. If you care about youth leadership, social skills, and public speaking confidence, this one is packed with doable next steps.

Connect with Lorrainne

Find her on LinkedIn, join her "Leadership for our Kids" Facebook group, or find her on Instagram @peersnotfears. Grab your freebie: 10 prompts to help teens think through challenging situations before they happen.

If this helps, subscribe, share it with a parent or teacher, and leave a review so more families can find these tools. What’s one “challenge zone” step you want to try this week?

Welcome to Speak Out Stand Out — the show where we build confidence in our future, one voice at a time. I’m your host, Elizabeth Green.

I grew up shy, so I know firsthand how life-changing it can be when someone helps you find your voice. Now, I get to help kids and teens do exactly that — and this podcast is a place to share those tools with you.

Each week, I talk with experts and inspiring guests about simple, practical and tangible ways to help the young people in

Thanks for listing! Be sure to check out the show notes for additional resources including a free public speaking lesson and 52 fun practice prompts. And if you enjoyed what you heard today, please give us a follow.

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