Episode 125: I'm bored at work (and I don't know if that means I should leave)

You're not unhappy, exactly. The job's fine. The pay's fine. Nobody's making your life difficult. And yet you've started caring far too much about office politics you used to ignore, and there's a tab open on a jobs site you keep telling yourself you're only browsing. Something's gone flat. You just can't work out whether that's a problem to fix or a sign to leave.

What you'll discover

• Why boredom is so much harder to act on than its louder cousin, burnout
• The reason being good at your job lets you hide it for years, from your team and from yourself
• The three very different things "I'm bored" can be hiding, and why telling them apart changes what you do next
• The step most people skip entirely before deciding whether to stay or go

Perfect for: anyone who has found themselves in a perfectly decent job who has quietly gone flat and doesn't know whether that means a conversation or a resignation.

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How to handle missing out on the promotion you wanted

You found out you didn't get it, and somewhere in the same breath you were already arranging your face into something gracious. The hard part wasn't that afternoon. It's the morning after, when you walk back into the same building, sit in the same meetings, and have to look entirely fine in front of the very people who watched you want it. That's the part no one prepares you for, and it's the part this episode is about.

What you'll discover

• Why missing out on something you put your name to stings in a way an outside rejection never does
• The two quiet decisions people tend to make in the first fortnight that cost them the most
• Why "don't take it personally" and "there'll be other opportunities" are both perfectly true and completely useless right now
• How long to let yourself feel rotten, and why putting a deadline on it changes everything
• The one question to ask for feedback that beats "why didn't I get it" by a mile

Perfect for any woman who's gone for something at work, not got it, and still has to show up the next day as though her week's going splendidly.

Want more support with real-world leadership challenges? Head to How to Build a Leader on Substack for in-depth guides and scripts.

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How to stop being the person everyone vents to

There's a queue that forms at your desk that you never advertised for. People bring you the impossible manager, the credit someone took, the meeting that went sideways, and you take it all in because you're the one who listens without making anyone feel small. The trouble is what it costs you. You leave most days wrung out, carrying conversations that were never yours to begin with, while your own work and your own worries sit waiting.

This episode of Career Espresso is about how you became the office's unofficial support service, why it falls to women so reliably, and how to stay the warm, trusted one without taking everybody's bad day home with you.

What you'll discover

• Why being brilliant to talk to quietly turns into unpaid work, and why being good at it tends to make things worse rather than better
• The reason "just set boundaries" is hollow advice for genuinely kind people, and what to reach for instead
• The one question that lets you be completely there for someone without picking up their problem and carrying it
• How to handle the person who's turned you into a daily service, without a big awkward confrontation

Perfect for women who are the ones everyone leans on at work, who leave most days carrying other people's weather, and who'd like to stay kind without running on empty.

Want more support with real-world leadership challenges? Head to How to Build a Leader on Substack for in-depth guides and scripts.

Never miss an episode. Sign up for the weekly Espresso Brief email and get each episode with quick takeaways in your inbox.

Get the full episode transcript

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.