In this personal Kiss & Tell episode of Big F*cking Dreams, Hannah shares an honest behind-the-scenes reflection on excellence, ambition, identity, and growth — and what it really looks like to raise your standards without returning to burnout.

From becoming unexpectedly obsessed with Heated Rivalry, to re-examining her relationship with excellence after burnout recovery, to rethinking how pain-based thinking shapes work, marketing, and personal goals — this episode is a candid look at how high performers evolve when they stop swinging between over-pushing and pulling back.

Key Takeaways:

• Burnout doesn't mean excellence is gone — it means capacity needs rebuilding
• You can raise your standards without self-punishment
• Excellence and sustainability are not opposites
• Showing up at 70% is still leadership
• Passion often reveals identity, not distraction
• Focusing on pain keeps you stuck; focusing on transformation moves you forward
• What you pay attention to shapes what you create
• Ambition works best when paired with self-trust and internal safety

Timestamps:

01:00 – A new (unexpected) obsession: Heated Rivalry
01:30 – A personal branding exercise that revealed a core truth
02:00 – Passion, intensity, and identity
02:30 – Falling into obsession — and what it reveals
03:00 – Why simple, focused storytelling works
04:30 – Courage, visibility, and self-acceptance
05:00 – Why this story mattered so deeply
06:00 – Shifting into excellence: watching the Taylor Swift documentary
06:30 – Rigor, discipline, and demanding excellence
07:00 – Burnout at 30 and stepping away from work
07:30 – Trauma recovery and rebuilding capacity
08:00 – Entrepreneurship after burnout
09:00 – "Just put it out" vs. "hold a higher standard"
10:00 – Raising the bar in content and leadership
10:30 – Excellence as identity — done healthily
11:30 – Living in the gray, not extremes
12:00 – Showing up at 70% instead of not at all
12:30 – Discipline without punishment
13:00 – The tension between excellence and consistency
13:30 – Why showing up still matters
14:00 – Pain-based vs. attraction-based marketing
14:30 – Trauma shaping how we see the world
15:00 – The reticular activating system explained
15:30 – Why focusing on what you don't want backfires
16:00 – Shifting toward transformation and desire
16:30 – Helping people change their internal operating system
17:00 – Re-orienting toward possibility and growth

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Gain Access to the free Career Confidence Course: https://www.hannahkissel.com/careerconfidence

The Truth About Imposter Syndrome: https://open.spotify.com/episode/129YgMPuJWGLQK5VB9CncR?si=a352646dfec6411a

Follow Hannah Kissel on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hannahmaekissel/

Connect with Hannah Kissel on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hannahkissel/

Quiz: Discover Your Career Alignment Score: https://hannahkisselcareerquiz.scoreapp.com

What do you do when your direct report keeps making serious mistakes — and you freeze every time you need to give feedback?

In this Hannah Hotline episode, Hannah responds to a senior associate at a top-tier firm who feels stuck between wanting to be kind and fearing being walked all over. A glaring client-caught error, missed instructions, and unspoken resentment all collide — revealing a deeper issue many high performers struggle with: conflict avoidance in positions of power.

Hannah breaks down how to lead with clarity without becoming cold or cruel, using Radical Candor and Nonviolent Communication to help you give feedback that actually supports growth — for your team and for yourself.

If you manage people, work with juniors, or feel responsible for protecting standards while staying human, this episode is a must-listen.

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Key Takeaways:

- Avoiding feedback doesn't protect people — it creates confusion and resentment
- Being "nice" without clarity is ruinous empathy
- Radical Candor allows you to care deeply and lead effectively
- Clear feedback is a form of leadership, not cruelty
- Nonviolent Communication gives you language when emotions are high
- High standards require explicit expectations, not hints
- Great leaders are willing to feel uncomfortable for the sake of growth

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Timestamps:

01:00 – Listener story: a major client catches a glaring mistake
02:00 – Resentment, self-betrayal, and fear of being a harsh boss
02:30 – Freezing instead of being direct
03:00 – Introducing Radical Candor
04:30 – Shame, anger, and fear underneath conflict avoidance
05:00 – The danger of "ruinous empathy"
05:30 – How avoiding feedback hurts your direct report's career
06:00 – Why senior leaders must challenge directly
07:00 – Setting standards is caring
07:30 – Why silence guarantees repeat mistakes
08:00 – Introducing Nonviolent Communication (NVC)
08:30 – Step 1: Observation (facts without judgment)
09:30 – Step 2: Naming your feelings without blame
10:30 – Step 3: Identifying the real need (trust, accuracy, standards)
11:30 – Step 4: Making a clear, actionable request
12:00 – Example: setting a proofreading process
12:30 – Caring personally while challenging directly
13:00 – Removing ambiguity and passive aggression
13:30 – Why clarity creates better performance
14:00 – What's really stopping you from speaking up
14:30 – Confidence, conviction, and leadership identity
16:00 – What reactions to feedback tell you about someone
16:30 – It's never too late to address a mistake

#nonviolentcommunication #RadicalCandor #HighPerformers #DifficultConversations #hannahkissel

🚨 Got a career challenge?

Submit your questions and frustrations to the Hannah Hotline!

Email: hello@hannahkissel.com

• Gain Access to the free Career Confidence Course: https://www.hannahkissel.com/careerconfidence
• Follow Hannah Kissel on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hannahmaekissel/
• Connect with Hannah Kissel on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hannahkissel/
• Visit Hannah's website: www.hannahkissel.com

What happens when your self-worth has been built on performance, achievement, and external validation — and then that structure starts to crack?

In this episode, Hannah sits down with Lindsay Zohni, CEO of The Growth Option, former LinkedIn top performer, and entrepreneur, for an unfiltered conversation about anxiety, imposter syndrome, entrepreneurship, and decoupling self-esteem from success.

Lindsay shares her journey from corporate leadership into entrepreneurship, unpacking the deep psychological and somatic work required to step away from "golden handcuffs," confront financial anxiety, and rebuild a sense of worth that isn't dependent on titles, income, or productivity. This episode is especially resonant for high performers who look successful on the outside but feel stuck, anxious, or quietly dissatisfied on the inside.

This is a powerful, honest exploration of what it actually takes to grow beyond survival-driven success — and into freedom, presence, and aligned ambition.

Timestamps:

00:00 – Becoming CEO & releasing imposter syndrome
02:00 – The fear of being "not enough" without a title
04:30 – Corporate validation vs. entrepreneurial self-trust
06:30 – Limiting beliefs: "I'm just a salesperson"
08:00 – Fighting the system vs. fighting yourself
10:00 – Losing the corporate feedback loop
12:00 – Primal fear, money, and entrepreneurship
13:30 – Financial dysmorphia explained
15:30 – When self-esteem is tied to achievement
17:30 – Decoupling worth from performance
18:30 – Why success doesn't disappear when self-esteem heals
20:30 – Feeling stuck despite "having it all"
22:00 – Anxiety, meditation, and the beginning of deep inner work
24:00 – Emotional completion vs. forgiveness
26:00 – Somatic healing and releasing stored trauma
29:00 – Why behavior change alone doesn't last
31:00 – Childhood beliefs still running adult lives
33:00 – "Wherever you go, there you are"
35:00 – Advice for professionals considering entrepreneurship
37:00 – Building self-trust and listening to what lights you up
39:00 – Lindsay's big dream: heart-centered leadership

Key Takeaways:
- Self-esteem tied to success creates anxiety, not fulfillment
- Imposter syndrome often survives achievement
- Entrepreneurship requires self-trust, not just competence
- Financial anxiety can persist even when you're objectively "safe"
- Healing internal belief systems unlocks calmer, more sustainable success
- Somatic work helps release patterns logic alone can't solve
- You don't need to destroy ambition — you need to transform it
- True freedom comes from internal safety, not external stability

Connect with Lindsay:

www.linkedin.com/in/lindsayzohni/

www.thegrowthoption.com

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Gain Access to the free Career Confidence Course: https://www.hannahkissel.com/careerconfidence

The Truth About Imposter Syndrome: https://open.spotify.com/episode/129YgMPuJWGLQK5VB9CncR?si=a352646dfec6411a

Follow Hannah Kissel on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hannahmaekissel/

Connect with Hannah Kissel on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hannahkissel/

Quiz: Discover Your Career Alignment Score: https://hannahkisselcareerquiz.scoreapp.com

#entrepreneurmindsets #HighPerformers #careerdecision #ImposterSyndrome #anxietyrecovery #ceostories #selfesteemmatters #EntrepreneurshipJourney #hannahkissel