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5. Tara

5. Tara

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Join us as Abi Thomas and Natalie Collins meet amazing women who have all been through the Own My Life Course, 12 sessions which enable women who have been subjected to abuse to regain ownership of their lives.Be aware that you will hear painful stories of many types of abuse during these episodes. But you will also hear a lot of joy - and we make no apology for that!Today we meet the splendid Tara. Tara is a strong and reflective woman who was partner subjected her to a prolonged and complex abuse within a ten-year relationship. His abuse was deeply emotional and psychological, including destroying her home, manipulating her, and his repeated cycles of blaming her and making her feel guilty. Tara’s partner owned a business with her. He is now subject to a 6 year harassment order and a short term restriction of liberty order. She describes herself as having been compassionate and empathic, focused on helping her partner and seeing the good in him, even as he became increasingly dysfunctional and his abuse towards her escalated.Tara sought healing and understanding through therapy and support groups, notably Own My Life and Women's Aid, which both played a major role in her recovery. She recognises both the trauma his abuse caused her and the strength it took to leave, rebuild, and redefine herself. Despite him taking so much from her; her home, business, financial security, and sense of identity, Tara maintains hope for the future and finds joy in simple pleasures, such as late-night walks and the companionship of her lovely dog.Throughout her story, Tara demonstrates courage, honesty, and a desire to help others understand the complexities of making sense of a relationship with an abusive partner. Her community is really important to her and seeks to move beyond what her partner did to her, reclaiming her agency and embracing personal growth.More information about Own My Life:Our training HEREFind a course HEREEvaluations HEREOwn My Life Discovery HEREFurther Reading and Resources:Woman's Aid UK and Scottish Women's AidSurviving Economic Abuse HEREThe Body Keeps the Score by ​Bessel van der KolkWhen the Body Says No by Gabor MateCoercive Control by Evan StarkMore on the Power Threat Meaning Framework Pattern HEREA Straight Talking Guide to the Power Threat Meaning FrameworkYou may realise as you listen that you, or someone you know, needs help or support to get safe. The National Domestic Abuse Helpline is on 0808 2000 247. If you have concerns that a man is behaving in an unsafe way to a partner you can contact the Respect Perpetrator Phoneline on 0800 802 4040.If you would like to talk to someone about suicidal feelings please call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline.The Rape Crisis England and Wales helpline is 0808 500 2222. Rape Crisis Scotland is 08088 010302 and Rape Crisis Northern Ireland is 0800 0246 991.Music: Untamed (Instrumental Version) used with permission and our thanks to Ludlów.
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