The Only Thing There Is to Want cover art

The Only Thing There Is to Want

A Memoir of Three Loves

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The Only Thing There Is to Want

By: Sarah Hepola
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About this listen

The New York Times bestselling author of Blackout excavates the romantic entanglements that defined her adulthood—an electrifying and unflinching account of the ways we choose love, it chooses us, and how those choices build a life.

“I’m scared I only want what I can’t have,” I said.
“Oh baby,” he said. “It’s the only thing there is to want.”

Sarah Hepola wanted so much: a big career; travel and adventure; deep relationships; passion. Having realized so many of those desires, she also grieved the ways her life was not what she’d always imagined it would be. Did I want too much, she wondered. Did I make the wrong choices? Love the wrong people?

In The Only Thing There Is To Want, Hepola revisits three complicated love affairs from her past, seeking to understand how they might have kept her from the life she’d envisioned, but also made her who she is. Examining her own decisions, Hepola probes the question: Is love ever really a choice?

This dazzling portrait of the mirages of modern romance captures the paradox of desire: wanting propels us forward and holds us back. Funny, achingly tender, and fearlessly intimate, The Only Thing There Is to Want is about discovering the beauty in the life you’ve built.
Love, Dating & Attraction Relationships Women

Critic reviews

“Sarah Hepola’s witty, candid, and gripping portrait of modern love plumbs the depths of desire, heartbreak, and a form of grief we don’t often name—capturing something essential about the search for connection in our disjointed age. The Only Thing There Is to Want reckons with the gift and curse of dating as a Gen X woman—raised to believe anything was possible, and finding that what she wants most remains just out of reach.”—Ada Calhoun, New York Times bestselling author of Why We Can’t Sleep and Crush
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