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The Human Magnet Syndrome

Why We Love People Who Hurt Us
Narrated by: Todd Reinhardt
Length: 6 hrs and 53 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (61 ratings)

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Summary

Since the dawn of civilization, men and women have been magnetically and irresistibly drawn together into romantic relationships, not so much by what they see, feel and think, but more by invisible forces. When individuals with healthy emotional backgrounds meet, the irresistible love force creates a sustainable, reciprocal and stable relationship. Codependents and emotional manipulators are similarly enveloped in a seductive dreamlike state; however, it will later unfold into a painful seesaw of love, pain, hope and disappointment. The soul mate of the codependent's dreams will become the emotional manipulator of their nightmares. Listeners of the Human Magnet Syndrome will better understand why they, despite their dreams for true love, find themselves hopelessly and painfully in love with partners who hurt them. This audiobook will guide and inspire both the layman and the professional.

©2013 CMI Education Institute (P)2013 Ross Rosenberg

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I am so happy I have found this book in audio!

What did you like most about The Human Magnet Syndrome?

I never knew how nurturing and healing knowledge can be. I have firstly watched Ross Rosenberg videos on youtube when I discovered my suffering and toxic relationships were attached to codependency... so i am in this healing path... breaking FREE soul journey! HIGHLY and DEARLY recommend this book. It is clearly written from someone who truly cares... and when we are hurting we need this!

5 of 5 people found this review helpful

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  • JP
  • 25-08-15

Defining enlightenment

Excellent book. Provides clear definitions and examples to understand the messages.

Also very helpful to understand people and relationships between them.

I highly recommend this book.

Thank you.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Meaningful concepts lost in repetition

The writer makes good use of visual imagery to communicate his concepts. However this is possibly the most repetitive book I have ever encountered. The listener is made to feel like an idiot who needs to be told ad nauseum about scales and dances, because it’s presented as such a lofty concept it couldn’t possibly be understood the first five times.

The narrator barely pauses for breath between chapters, and the tone is a sermonizing rather than inviting. Nevertheless I persevered to the bitter end, as I have enjoyed some of this writers YouTube videos, and actually the book improved in variability towards the end.

It does give some understanding on a very scientific level of why the codependent and narcissist are mutually drawn together. There is no sense of compassion in the book, these are facts, not feelings. If you have been at the receiving end of narcissistic abuse the best you can hope for in this book is a realisation that the narcissist can’t change, but the co-dependant can. The person I have most respect for on this subject to date is Darlene Lancer, and I really would love the audible platform to invest in this author. When it was first suggested to me I had co-dependant tendencies I couldn’t understand it because ostensibly I saw a book about the children and spouses of alcoholics. This book suffers from a similar fate in that the narrative is very slow to expand beyond dating. If you think you might be codependent you need to identify yourself very quickly in the writing or the message is lost... this is therefore not the book to introduce the concept to potential codependents.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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Fantastic book. So insightful.

I would seriously recommend this book to anyone who struggles with toxic relationships. Weather you think you are self love deficiant or have narcissistic traits, this book will benefit all.

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Excellent book

Totally recommend for its clarity and thorough covering of the subject. Very good explanation of how people get attracted to people who may be a hindrance for personal development and freedom from childhood roles. I now know what I need to do .
Excellent reading

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Game changer!! Love it - my golden rule and tool-book

As a newly qualified Nlp practitioner and somebody that has had a rainbow of therapy from the age of 13 (now 37) I can actually say this book was amazing from start to the last full stop! I totally relate and am proud of my own journey and feel it has helped me to understand why manipulators act as they do as I only learnt why I act as I do (co dependant). With this understanding I will be able to be a better therapist myself. Therapy never ends and self awareness is key to live a fulfilling life. Thank you to my own therapist for recommending me this awesome book 🙌🏾❤️

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Enlightening & essential reading for anyone living or dealing with narcissistic abuse

Great place to start recovery from narcissistic abuse Before reading this book I wasn't clear on the why and how my relationship was so grossly dysfunctional nor who was abusing who, the years of gas lighting, blame, and emotional torture had me confused. Was I really the reason my relationship had failed when I'd given so much of myself to my partner? This detailed book, whilst sometimes repetitive and quite technical to the layman, provided the answer I needed. It has enough clarity that I now have the answer I sought and the understanding that I, as a co dependant HAVE contributed to the dysfunctionallity of my relationships. I am now clear and ready to start my own recovery and transformation from high co-dependency. I also have the enthusiasm and belief that for the co-dependant there is hope. The aha moment comes towards the end of the book. Midway I wasn't sure what, if any, help this book would bring, but quite astonishingly, once the logic and understanding starts to grow ALL of the answers fell into place. This book is not a course for recovery or healing as you might expect, this book lays the foundation for this by helping the co-dependant understand in detail what he or she is and why this happens. Once the logical explanation was realised I felt a huge sense of relief and had the energy to look for the treatment I need to break the cycles and develop myself out of co-dependency and find the happiness I crave.
Audiobook works well but the quote references do get in the way of the detail on occasion. Ross offers courses for recovery on his website, I'm contemplating taking his course as a follow on step, I will update this review with a note on how well this fits.

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amazing!!!

fantastic read! very insightful, thought providing and easy to grasp concepts.
I highly recommend this book to counsellors psychotherapists and it's about time social workers understood this stuff.

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Interesting read

Very insightful and helped me a lot. Found it a bit repetitive at times and the voice, at some instances emotionless and monotone. But this has helped me a lot.

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eye opening

a very eye opening listen for any person who wants to be successful in relationships

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Brandi
  • 05-01-15

A MUST listen!

One of the best out there! It's a scary realization but this book was very helpful and informative. Highly recommended.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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  • Angela Cerullo
  • 30-08-15

Everyone should listen to this book!

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

I recommend everyone listen to this book. It not only explains personality traits and why one is attracted to another but also explains the generation before and then the effect a personality trait has on their own children. I understood a lot of what I was doing to my own children, thinking I was being a good mom, but enabling them to become either narcissistic or codependent. It was a life changer. I'm listening to it a third time and each time I learn more and more about my actions and how it may effect my children. Please read!

12 of 14 people found this review helpful

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  • ST
  • 04-08-14

Really helped me understand codependency

Would you consider the audio edition of The Human Magnet Syndrome to be better than the print version?

I'm not sure - haven't read it in print but I do feel I would've had a harder time feeling as engaged had I read the print version

What was one of the most memorable moments of The Human Magnet Syndrome?

I remember realizing that the selfish nature of the alcoholic I was involved with was described to a T, meaning that it wasn't just me being critical of them or imagining how badly I was treated which helped me feel that the end of the relationship was truly for the best

Which character – as performed by Todd Reinhardt – was your favorite?

N/A

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

A couple of lines made me cry when I realized the person I had invested so heavily in was and never will be capable of returning my affections and that I was giving WAY more than was deserved

Any additional comments?

I think this is really helpful resource for anyone struggling with codependency (both platonic and romantic) and needing some logic as a guide. I think breaking it down into psychological contexts can help define and give structure to what otherwise feels like the losing side of emotional warfare.

12 of 14 people found this review helpful

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  • Claudia Riecken
  • 21-08-15

Claudia Riecken

Surprisingly complete and insightful, the best cover on the survivors needed endeavor to change inside, after not only getting rid of abusers, but indeed, of the abused inside of us. Attract love. Self love and be brave. Thank you Ross!

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • Jeff
  • 16-07-18

Makes a common problem between people seem hopeless

Not a great book. When you have to tell someone that something is a certain way it most often is not. In this book the author says that he is not bias. But he is...and it is fairly obvious. He was harmed by what he calls an emotional manipulator. And the tone throughout the book is that the victim can be helped but the perp absolutely cannot. It encourages the separation of the attracted couples without further consideration as the situation is hopeless. If you want a book that will help you decide to leave someone with a personality disorder this one will help you with that. If you are looking for a book to help you in your relationship take the information here with a grain of salt.

On the other side of the Coin this book allows me to see my therapists true view of situation like the content matter. It is disappointing that this book is probably mostly read by therapist or people with severe issues. The content often tries to guide therapists or reduce their confidence to be a viable helper. It uses propaganda that would often make a therapist shy away from helping what the author has termed an emotional manipulator.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • Wilme
  • 08-05-16

Dissapointed

Human magnet concept well explained, but I think it could have been done in 5 chapters. I was expecting a lot more on practical advice and tools - even if those were to be applied repetatively over many years. I felt left having more insiht into the mechanisms involved but with no tools to change these patterns.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • Diane Kennedy
  • 08-04-16

Good content, but writing needs work

I really liked the concepts in this book, but I found some parts tedious. The author has a tendency to over explain himself and the process he's using to describe and define behaviors.

While it's described as being for professionals and clients, it's definitely much more geared for therapists.

If you're looking for an understanding of how and why someone (or you) gets hooked on people who hurt you in the same ways, you'll get that here. What you won't get is direction on what to do about it.

5 of 6 people found this review helpful

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  • ANDREA
  • 31-01-16

Entertaining truth

I used to have problems with narcissists... no more! Read this book and you'll know much of what you need. For more knowledge turn to 2 timothy 3 in the bible.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • Doha
  • 02-10-15

one of the best

loved the author analysis and explanations, I highly recommend this book for people who struggle in relationships due to narcs parents abuse.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • Bear Nolen
  • 14-12-15

hated this book with a passion.

author characterises Codependents as weak, submissive and helpless while promoting his disproven theory.

damaging read, he quoted a lot of outdated data.

4 of 5 people found this review helpful