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Summary

In this honest discussion of mental health, the founder of Therapy for Women explores our reasons for drinking alcohol - and the benefits of taking a break.

When “retired party girl” and popular therapist Amanda White admitted she was an alcoholic, it wasn’t because she’d done something outrageous while under the influence, like land herself in jail or get married in Vegas. It was because she realized three things: 

  1. Alcohol was making her life worse. 
  2. Moderation wasn’t helping. 
  3. She could not be a therapist if she continued to use alcohol to numb her life. 

Something needed to change - not just her relationship with alcohol, but her relationship with herself.

Choosing not to drink can be daunting. It’s everywhere in our culture, our socializing, and our destressing. And it can seem black or white: You drink or you don’t (and if you don’t, people ask why). That’s where Not Drinking Tonight comes in. Judgement-free and relatable, Amanda helps you unpack your relationship with alcohol by showing you how to: 

  1. Find out why you drink. Whether it’s a glass of wine after work or a weekly bar crawl, your drinking habits can be the result of everything from biology to trauma.
  2. Heal your relationship with alcohol. Understand how your relationships have been affecting your life, and learn how to set boundaries and create true self-care.
  3. Build the sober life you love. Learn what comes next - how to maintain your social life, navigate sex and relationships, and love yourself.

Not Drinking Tonight isn’t a program to stop drinking. It’s the first book to help you address the root issues that cause you to reach for a drink and create a life you love - one that is not perfect but is messy and real and one you are fully present for.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2022 Amanda E. White, LPC (P)2022 Hachette Go

Critic reviews

"Not Drinking Tonight is a wonderful guide to setting healthy boundaries with alcohol—and yourself. Amanda helps you dig into the root of your struggles to better understand why you drink and why you might want to stop—setting you up for a more fulfilling life all around, even if you don’t choose full sobriety. Readers will gain the self-awareness, compassion, and confidence to make choices that better serve them.”—Nedra Tawwab, MSW, LCSW, New York Times bestselling author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace

"Anyone wanting to change their relationship with alcohol must be willing to do some deep self-examination. Amanda White’s multi-layered approach offers empowerment, experience, and wisdom to those looking to begin their own journeys."—Annie Grace, author of This Naked Mind and The Alcohol Experiment 

"A knowledgeable, compassionate, and supportive guide. With a wealth of examples, tools, practices, and new ways of relating to both alcohol and the self, Not Drinking Tonight will be an accessible and revelatory balm for anyone questioning the kind of life they want to create outside of drinking.”—Lisa Olivera, LMFT, author of Already Enough 

What listeners say about Not Drinking Tonight

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fantastic

absolutely loved this ❤️ helped so much in many ways ❤️ purchase you won't be disappointed

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Misleading Title

This is much less a book about not drinking and much more about mindfulness and wellbeing. I am sure the title has helped it to sell more as if it had a more accurate title it wouldn't be half as popular.

Very repetitive checklists, over and over again seem to fill a lot of time.

I managed nearly 4 hours of the book before I had to give up. Just not one for me.

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For the sober curious

A non-judgemental look at sobriety and real life tools to genuinely create a life you don’t want to escape from.
Highly recommend.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 23-06-22

Great book

I really enjoyed. I do like when authors read their own books, but I get not always possible. That was my only eh. But other than that, great book.

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  • Dave
  • 08-03-22

lots of powerful, useful tools

but also lots of therapy gobbly gook. now I know why people who go to tons of therapy talk the way they do and sound like they belong to a cult.

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  • Sarah A. Brewer
  • 26-02-22

So much more than a not drinking book

There is no way you can get to the heart of any addiction without addressing the factors that caused it. Amanda White integrates shame, trauma, and psychology to both address why we drink and how to find healthy alternatives. This book launched me into learning more about these topics, while helping me understand what I already new better. She has an amazing way of understanding and explaining clearly.

Whether it's drinking, shopping or battling any other unhealthy habit, this book is it.

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  • Ann A
  • 18-02-22

Great read

This was a great book! I felt like it was too short I wanted it to keep going. She’s a great writer and had so many amazing takeaways.

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  • Jarrod
  • 15-02-22

Great piece of work!

So much usable information and experience that it’s hard to overstate the value of this book to those of us questioning our relationship with alcohol. GIVE IT A LISTEN!

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 11-02-22

Inspiring and relatable!

I really enjoyed this listen! The narrator did a fantastic job as well! It is very animated and engaging!
The author takes you through clips of a therapy session with 4 different woman. I related most to Andrea; however I saw a small piece of myself in each of them. It had loads of wisdom, advice, understanding, and self compassion tips. I am by no means addicted to alcohol and nobody from the outside would ever say I had a problem with alcohol. But to me, it’s a problem. I’m happier when I don’t drink and drinking doesn’t align with the way I want to live my life or what I want to achieve in this life! This book has inspired me and given me tools to stop drinking.
I’m really excited for a more present, beautiful, and courageous life! Thank you, Amanda!

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  • Christon
  • 02-02-22

Definitely worth the listen!

This exceeded all my expectations! Amanda did an amazing job of bringing together education, compassion, and recommended solutions. I will be recommending this to others for the rest of my life.

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  • Nancy
  • 15-01-22

Best investment

If you’re trying to make any changes in your life start here. This book is one of the best things I have ever spent my money on. If you like to journal and get to know yourself better this is for you. Bought this hoping to understand my relationship to alcohol and I’m leaving with more questions, realizations and aspirations about who I am, my life and how I want to live it.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 14-01-22

Fascinating read with a modern view of sobriety

This book is great! definitely recommended for anyone struggling with alcohol, interested in examining their relationship with alcohol, or even people who are just sober curious! I also think this could be an especially helpful resource for anyone who treats clients or patients struggling with alcohol abuse and/or addiction. I am sure I will come back to this book more than once throughout my career. I really appreciated the perspective as it felt free from moral judgement, stigma, while remaining honest and gentle. highly recommend!

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  • Jessica S.
  • 11-01-22

Everyone can benefit from this book

So so good. Replace alcohol with anything you used to cope and you can benefit from this book. Touches on so many aspects of life and encourages along the way.