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  • "Kill The Black One First"

  • A memoir of hope and justice
  • By: Michael Fuller
  • Narrated by: Michael Fuller
  • Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
  • 4.7 out of 5 stars (308 ratings)
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"Kill The Black One First" cover art

"Kill The Black One First"

By: Michael Fuller
Narrated by: Michael Fuller
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Summary

This audiobook was previously published under the title "A Search For Belonging"

A story about race, identity, belonging and displacement, "Kill the Black One First" is the memoir from Michael Fuller - Britain's first ever black Chief Constable, whose childhood in care and career in policing is not only a stark representation of race relations in the UK, but also a unique morality tale of how humanity deals with life's unfairness.

Hoping to tackle injustice and create change from within, Michael joined the police force. There, he experienced racism and inequality, from colleagues shouting racist insults, to the Brixton Riots where 'Kill the black one first!' was yelled from the crowds. Determined, despite everything, not to turn and walk away, he rose through the ranks and made his way to the very top.

"Kill the Black One First" is an unflinching account of a life in policing during a tumultuous period, and how one man set out, against the odds, to try and belong.

Includes an exclusive interview with the author.

©2019 Michael Fuller (P)2019 Bonnier Books UK

Critic reviews

This provocatively titled memoir is one of a kind and offers up a perspective that is currently lacking in the discourse surrounding race in Britain. (Derek Owusu, author of SAFE)

This is the story of a diligent, bright and sensitive individual who cares passionately about justice [but] at the heart of Fuller's journey is a quest to belong... His journey is utterly inspiring and it powerfully illuminates the dynamics of racial conflict in England over the past fifty years from someone who was in a very unique position. (Eric Karl Anderson, Lonesome Reader)

Michael Fuller is an extraordinary man with a remarkable and interesting story. (Helen Mirren)

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What listeners say about "Kill The Black One First"

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  • LG
  • 26-05-21

Really interesting

Thank you for sharing your story with openness and vulnerability.

I found this so interesting and inspiring to see how much Michael overcame to achieve what he has. As opposed to the view that he got to where he is as a token black police officer, instead he demonstrates again and again how much more he had to do to be seen and considered, standing up for himself and not being deterred.

Having had a brief experience in the Met this was particularly interesting as the levels of bureaucracy and structural barriers are immediately apparent and it takes a strong person to keep going and to inspire a new way which works for everyone, not just those with power and privellage.

Highly recommend.

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Outstanding autobiography

This is an inspirational autobiography of a life of outstanding achievement, against incredible obstacles. The author narrates his own story in a measured and engaging way. I just had to keep on listening and was disappointed when it finished. I'd like to hear more from this author. His resilience and determination are incredible.

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6 people found this helpful

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Powerful insight into institutionalised racism

Powerful insight into institutionalised racism. Author reflects on the barriers of a being a black police officer, the everyday barriers and how he overcame systematic barriers to make and impact on equality and diversity in the force. A must read

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Enjoyed this so much

Thank you for this wonderful book! I got it in the sale and had no idea what it would be like - so very pleased I did, it was utterly fascinating. So calmly read that despite the subject matter it was relaxing to listen to. His childhood was a very interesting insight and then his remarkable career in the police with so many inside stories showing what was really going on and the attitudes and racism. A very talented and resilient man who comes across as such a nice guy. Highly recommended.

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Amazing

Such insights and such a legacy left - I was so humbled reading this book.

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Search for belonging indeed

Fuller takes us through an idlic childhood as a kid in care with strong grounding with the refusal to bow to people making judgement of him as a black person on the one hand but at the same time being co-opted into keeping silent about is skin in order to belong showing how insidious racism is.

This may seem to make it you a complicit part of the institutional structure with nowhere to turn to, so you not fully accepted by the people you work with and neither by the people you aim to serve.

In the end I empathise with Fuller and also found it wonderful that he found that he was loved by both parents that had to give him up even if they could not show it.

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I can totally relate

First of all, I’m personally impressed by care provided by aunt Margaret, secondly the bravery of Michael and thirdly, his achievements. What a great story. I can personally relate. His story can be applied to many different professions, experiences & lived experiences

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Thank you for sharing

I listened to this book over a weekend could not stop.
It was awesome and caused me to reflect.

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10 people found this helpful

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A search for belonging

A great and truly inspirational read. Thought provoking and at times worrying. A role model for all young people.

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An eye opener! Very interesting!

Great story and the book is very well thought and written. Fantastic voice from the author as well. Very soothing.

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