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If I Let You Go

The Heartbreaking, Shocking Richard and Judy Book Club Pick

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If I Let You Go

By: Charlotte Levin
Narrated by: Maxine Peake
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About this listen

A Richard and Judy Book Club pick, If I Let You Go is a darkly comic tale of searing loss, coercive control and the consequences of taking the wrong path.

'Simultaneously tragic and uplifting . . . Charlotte Levin is SUCH a clever writer' - Ruth Jones, author of Love Untold

Every morning, Janet Brown goes to work cleaning offices. It calms her – cleanliness, neatness. All the things she’s unable to do with her soul can be achieved with a damp cloth and a splash of bleach. However the guilt she still carries, about a devastating loss that happened eleven years ago, cannot be erased.

When Janet finds herself involved in a train crash, she recognizes her chance to do what she couldn’t all those years ago. And she makes a decision. As news spreads of Janet’s actions, her story inspires everyone around her and, for the first time, her life has purpose. Her future is filled with hope.

But Janet's story isn't quite what it seems. And, as events spiral out of control, she soon discovers that coming clean isn't an option. Because if Janet washes away the lies, what long-buried truths will she finally have to face?

If I Let You Go by Charlotte Levin is a deeply moving and compelling portrayal of a woman coming to terms with loss.

 Coming of Age Family Life Fiction Genre Fiction Women's Fiction Thought-Provoking

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Critic reviews

A gripping story. My heart was in my mouth! (Ruth Jones, author of Love Untold)
Heartrending and surprising, with an very believable protagonist, this is a tale of loss, grief, abuse and fractured relationships. A tremendously moving second novel from Charlotte Levin.
Exploring grief and guilt, this thriller is an easy page turner. Heartfelt but with a dark streak.
Levin's debut If I Can't Have You was a must-read and this new book is just as addictive.
A moving portrait of a coercive marriage that will have you gripped to see if Janet will break free
A thoughtful, beautifully written book about grief, and ordinary people being thrown into extraordinary circumstances. Unusual and compelling, with just a touch of humour. Loved it (Catherine Cooper author of The Chalet and The Cruise)
Impossible to put down, this is a darkly brilliant novel that balances the heartbreak with the humour. (Louise Hare, bestselling author of This Lovely City)
Powerful, hard-hitting, provoking (L.V. Matthews, bestselling author of The Twins and The Prank)
Tremendously powerful. Nobody writes quite like Charlotte Levin. It's at once uplifting and heartbreaking; excruciating and inspiring. She captures the essence of her characters like no other writer I know. A brilliant achievement. (Emma Christie, bestselling author of Find Her First and The Silent Daughter)
What a treat this book is. There hasn't been a protagonist who has got under my skin in such a big way since Eleanor Oliphant. I rooted for Janet from the first page, and in all her sadness and shyness, wanted the best for her. Beautifully observed and tender, this is a story of redemption, of loss and survival, full of twists and turns, and with a big northern heart pulsing throughout (Julie Hesmondhalgh, from The Pact, Broadchurch and Coronation Street)
I loved If I Let You Go. It is beautifully written, stark yet redemptive — moving, hopeful, powerful and wonderfully human. Charlotte Levin is the queen of complex narrators. I feel like I’ve known Janet all my life. (Caroline Hulse, author of All the Fun of the Fair)
Utterly gripping, almost unbearably poignant yet warm, wise and full of hope - a story I'll remember for a long time. (Frances Quinn bestselling author of The Smallest Man)
Charlotte Levin is one of the most interesting and talented writers around at the moment (Trevor Wood, bestselling author of Dead End Street)
It is both heartbreaking and hopeful - Charlotte writes the most stunning prose and her character observations are both darkly humorous and incredibly insightful. I loved it! (Nikki Smith author of Look What You Made Me Do)
All stars
Most relevant
A heartfelt suspense story. Janet has my sympathy. Towards the end I was desperate to hear the next part of the plot.

Didn’t want this to end.

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I loved this story. The writing- every single line- was exceptional. I didn't want it to end . I felt so much for the main character snd her relationship with the world. I think a lot of people will relate to how toxic her marriage was. There was humour as well as darkness. It showed thd powerful bond between human beings and how the people we interact with, even on a shallow basis, can become an essentisl part of our lives- a part that can make lofe worth living.
I'm going to read the writer's next book and hope she brings out many more novels like this one.
Maxine Peak was, of course, an outstanding narrator.
You won't regret reading this.

Best book ever

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Poor Janet. Worn down by grief and her controlling partner. Seeks redemption. She’s an anti-hero and Maxine Peake brings her character to life. Great writing.

Good story, well read. Moving.

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Narration was perfect. Thoroughly enjoyed the writing and sympathised with the main character. The menace that she experienced at home was subtle and true.

The writing is suberb, i felt the suspense and emotions.

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Maxine Peak was brilliant as the narrator. Her voice brings all the characters to life and I was immersed in the small Greater Manchester town and Janet's suffocating life.
The story is fast paced once it gets going and the tension builds as it goes along and the listener feels continuously anxious about the repercussions of others finding out Janet's secrets.
Totally recommend it.
I can't wait for the next book from Charlotte and I hope Maxine does more narrations. it's great to hear a northern accent on here!

Loved it

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