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If Chins Could Kill
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One of my dad’s favorite jokes about getting older was: “I went out for coffee when I was twenty-one and when I got back I was fifty-eight!” I get what he meant now. Time flies. My first book, If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a "B" Movie Actor, was published back in 2001 and it chronicles the adventures of a “mid-grade, kind of hammy actor" (my words), cutting his teeth on exploitation movies far removed from mainstream Hollywood. This next book, an “Act II” if you will, could be considered my “maturing years” in show business, when I began to say “no” more often and gravitated toward self-generated material. Taking stock in the overall quality of my life, I fled Los Angeles and moved to a remote part of Oregon to renew, regroup and reload. If that sounds tame, the journey from Evil Dead to Spider-Man to Burn Notice was long, with plenty of adventures/mishaps along the way. I never pictured myself hovering above Baghdad in a Blackhawk helicopter, facing a pack of wild dogs in Bulgaria, or playing an aging Elvis Presley with cancer on his penis - how can you predict this stuff? The sheer lunacy of show business is part of the fun for me and I hope you'll come along for the ride.
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Summary
Life is full of choices. Right now, yours is whether or not to buy the autobiography of a mid-grade, kind of hammy actor.
Am I supposed to know this guy? you think to yourself.
No, and that's exactly the point. The truth is that though you might not have a clue who I am, there are countless working stiffs like me out there, grinding away every day at the wheel of fortune.
If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor is my first book, and I invite you to ride with me through the choppy waters of blue collar Hollywood.
Okay, so buy the damned book already!
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- Katherine
- United Kingdom
- 05-07-15
Groovy: the 2010 edition
The inimitable Bruce Campbell, one of the most distinctive voices (and chins) in show business, recounts his life story with charm and humour. From growing up with legendary filmmaker Sam Raimi to working with the Coen brothers and cross-dressing on the NZ set of Hercules, Campbell's story has warmth and remains down to earth throughout. A heartily recommended listen from the star of the Evil Dead movies and a must for fans. Even for those who have read the book, the lengthy addendum recounting events on his book tour to promote the original version of this story makes it a worthwhile addition to every Deadite's collection.
3 of 3 people found this review helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- kmcca5
- Deepest Darkest Yapton, West Sussex
- 07-08-14
Very Funny Book
Any additional comments?
I had been told this was worth a read so was very happy to see it on audible. I wasn’t disappointed. I am a fan of Bruce Campbell and I guess that helps but I didn’t quite expect it to be as funny as it was.
Well worth checking out for anyone that likes a laugh, enjoys films and wondered what it is like to be an actor in B movies.
3 of 3 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Alexander
- 27-10-14
Groovy!
What did you like most about If Chins Could Kill?
Full of information, that any fan of Bruce Campbell, will want to know!
What was one of the most memorable moments of If Chins Could Kill?
Bruce talking about shooting on 8mm.
Which character – as performed by Bruce Campbell – was your favourite?
Elvis.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
Well I didn't listen to it in the toilet.
Any additional comments?
A must for fans of Bruce Campbell!
2 of 2 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- F. Varga
- 23-04-16
One of the best "feel good" listens I've ever had
I saw "Evil Dead" on VHS when I was 12. I had already become interested in filmmaking and special effects by then so instead of being scared I was impressed by the unique atmosphere and slapstick humor of the film. I became fond of Bruce Campbell then and was happy to spot him in stuff through the years ever since, be it a leading role or supporting. But there were a lot of things I didn't know about him, for example how good he is at telling stories. His voice is very pleasant, and the whole audiobook feels like you're having a chat with an old friend whom you haven't seen since high school.
1 of 1 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- J. R. Yelland
- 02-02-19
Great book if you know Bruce's work
great book and a good insight into acting from his prospective. obviously if you have never heard of Bruce Campbell then you probably wouldn't buy the book.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
- talker
- 27-11-18
Well Worth a Read
This is an excellent, honest autobiography of a b movie actor who is vastly becoming a legend.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- matt
- 29-10-18
Groovy baby
if you're a Bruce Campbell fan or an Evil dead fan it's a must listen
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Steven Bowen
- 11-06-18
Very informative insights
Very informative insights on a humble B movie actor, funny, informative and sounds a around nice guy.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Tarjinder
- 04-04-18
if chins could kill
very entertaining in parts and interesting as well it's certainly worth the purchase price I need one more word to finish the review
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Nigel C. Cox
- 28-03-18
Superb, unique retrospective
I’m impressed.
This is both novel and extremely well constructed.
Bruce Campbell looks back on a life in the public (and not so public) eye and lets the abyss in.
Humorous and heartfelt, this is a must for any fan or anyone aspiring actor.
Congratulations, sir. I just can’t help smiling.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Sarah Nelson
- 04-04-15
Chin-tacular
I loved this book. Bruce (we're on a first name basis) has a perfect voice for narration. I could (and did) listen to him talk for hours. The book made me realize just how human actors actually are. His stories are funny and his observations of society are hilarious. I enjoyed every minute of this book.
22 of 22 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Stingray
- 05-08-14
One Of The Most Enjoyable Books I Have Ever Heard
Would you listen to If Chins Could Kill again? Why?
Yes
There is a wealth of insider information on how Hollywood works and the inside story on what it takes to be a successful actor.
Who was your favorite character and why?
Bruce Campbell, of course.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
The tender story of how a chin conquered Hollywood and won our hearts
Any additional comments?
This book is funny, informative and sometimes downright dangerous to listen to when driving home from work as you can laugh so hard you might fall out of your seat - thank goodness for seat belts.
I've enjoyed Bruce's work in front of the camera since I first saw him in the Evil Dead series. It wasn't until I listened to this book that I found out that he was an integral part of many other favorite movies and TV shows in a behind the camera capacity.
Thanks to Bruce's dramatic reading and witty prose, this is one of the all time best listens I've ever gotten from audible.com.
I hope audible gets more of Bruce's books in stock soon.
I hope you get as much enjoyment out of this book as I did.
Cheers.
33 of 34 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- georgellama
- 04-05-16
The audio edition is better than the book.
I read the book several years ago and throughly enjoyed it. Bruce's narration makes a very good book great.
12 of 12 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- TW Brown, Author, Editor, and Reviewer
- 16-02-15
Easily a B+
As a long time fan of Bruce Campbell, it was sort of interesting to hear him talk about things that were far from glamorous when it comes to the life of a "movie star" in the industry. He also gave some fun backstories to a few of those films you know you love if you are even bothering to glance at this title.
The only downside is that this book was written well before "Burn Notice" took off and became a bit of a hit. It would have been fun to hear about some of that part of what has now become perhaps a nudge closer to B+ as far as his acting status is concerned.
If you want something fluffy and full of pretentious nonsense, read the tabloids. If you want a real guy to tell you how it really is, this is a fun read.
Having Bruce read his own book made it that much better. You felt like you were just hanging out and he was telling you his tale.
22 of 25 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Josh C
- 19-04-16
Bruce Campbell rocks out his story!
Great listen for fans of Bruce Campbell. Much like Ash vs. Evil Dead, nobody else could have pulled this off.
4 of 4 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Tammi
- 20-01-15
Makes you understand the movie & TV business
This was a very hysterical book. Bruce explains his family background and complete history of the film business. I never saw Evil Dead, but now it's on my Netflix list. He also explains everything you ever wanted to know about tv & movie business. Fair warning though there is no mention of his Burn Notice days, as it was only in season 4.
7 of 8 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Colleen D
- 30-04-15
Groovy!!!
Loved listen to him tell his story, it was sitting listen to good friend or family.
6 of 7 people found this review helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- wolffw34
- 08-06-15
Hail To The King!
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
Anyone I know who's a fan of any of these subjects will enjoy this audiobook:
Chins
The Evil Dead
Cheesy B Movies
Chins
Sam Raimi
Burn Notice
Spider-Man
Chins
Darkman
True Stories Based on Early 80s Horror Movies
Fake True Stories Based on Early 80s Horror Movies
1973 yellow Oldsmobile
Chins
True Fake Fake Stories Based on Early 80s Horror Movies
Chins
What was one of the most memorable moments of If Chins Could Kill?
Any moment involving chins.
Which character – as performed by Bruce Campbell – was your favorite?
Himself. Although his impression of the greedy, pig-headed Ted Raimi is also pretty spot on. From what I've heard about him he sounds like a pretty terrible person who, in place of a chin, is just all neck*
*What I heard about him came primarily from this book.
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
It made me want to chainsaw my own chin off in shame of the knowledge that it will only get me so far in life...which turns out won't be very far.
Any additional comments?
Chins, chins, chins! Listen to this audiobook now please.
8 of 10 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Stacey K.
- 15-09-14
A Look Into the Life of a Hollywood Working Stiff
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
Absolutely. It offers an incredible and hilarious look into Bruce Cambell's life, and is enjoyable, even if you don't know him.
What other book might you compare If Chins Could Kill to and why?
There are not many other books that I have read or listened to that are similar. ICCK is its own beast.
Which character – as performed by Bruce Campbell – was your favorite?
All are wonderful, Irvin Shapiro and the Acid-Dropping Fan being standouts.
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
There was many a moment when I physically laughed out loud at his well-told anecdotes.
Any additional comments?
I highly recommend this book to anyone who would be interested in the crazy world of Hollywood.
4 of 5 people found this review helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- MC
- 05-09-14
Hilarious, honest, fascinating, and ever so Bruce
If you could sum up If Chins Could Kill in three words, what would they be?
Bruce Campbell rules
What was one of the most memorable moments of If Chins Could Kill?
The whole story of evil dead is pretty fantastic and hearing about them all growing up together was fantastic.
What about Bruce Campbell’s performance did you like?
He brings a certain ineffable charm to every line, you hear one word and you know it's really Bruce.
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
I laughed out loud many times.
Any additional comments?
I love Bruce Campbell.
6 of 8 people found this review helpful