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How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen

A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7
Length: 10 hrs and 8 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (308 ratings)

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Summary

A must-have resource for anyone who lives or works with young kids, with an introduction by Adele Faber, coauthor of the international best-seller The Boston Globe dubbed "The Parenting Bible".

For over 35 years, parents have turned to How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk for its respectful and effective solutions to the unending challenges of raising children. Now, in response to growing demand, Adele's daughter, Joanna Faber, along with Julie King, tailor How to Talk's powerful communication skills to children ages two to seven.

Faber and King, each a parenting expert in her own right, share their wisdom accumulated over years of conducting How To Talk workshops with parents and a broad variety of professionals. With a lively combination of storytelling, cartoons, and fly-on-the-wall discussions from their workshops, they provide concrete tools and tips that will transform your relationship with the young kids in your life.

What do you do with a little kid who...won't brush her teeth...screams in his car seat...pinches the baby...refuses to eat vegetables...runs rampant in the supermarket? Organized according to common challenges and conflicts, this book is an essential emergency first-aid manual of communication strategies, including a chapter that addresses the special needs of children with sensory processing and autism spectrum disorders.

This user-friendly guide will empower parents and caregivers to forge rewarding, joyful relationships with terrible two-year-olds, truculent three-year-olds, ferocious four-year-olds, foolhardy five-year-olds, self-centered six-year-olds, and the occasional semi-civilized seven-year-old. And, it will help little kids grow into self-reliant big kids who are cooperative and connected to their parents, teachers, siblings, and peers.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying reference material will be available in your My Library section along with the audio.

©2017 Joanna Faber and Julie King (P)2017 Simon & Schuster

What members say

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very-very-very good

Excellent performance from all the narrators and authors! Really enjoyable to listen and very informative. I'm still in progress to change how I'm with my kids along the advises from this book, but can say that after a week - loosely using the tools that are presented in the book - got some very positive changes.
It also had some life gems for me. Never really understood why I couldn't take praises when I was a child myself, but after listening the part about praises, now finally understood what mistakes most of us do when praising one and another.
The authors are not pretending to give you a 100% working examples, since all kids are different this would be impossible, but rather many-many good techniques and advises.

Must "read" for all busy/stressed/normal parents :)

15 of 16 people found this review helpful

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  • lv
  • 17-09-17

Never too late to try different approaches

It's not a magic wound - nothing is. But there are some good tips and explanations. Happy I bought it.

17 of 21 people found this review helpful

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good go to ideas

provides you with some techniques to use when you're at a loose end. Has helped to de-escalate some tantrums. I think my parenting and approach to parenting has developed through listening to this.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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You have no idea what you're doing

You think you know how to communicate with your child effectively, heck, you even think you know how to communicate to your wife effectively. You don't. I didn't. I still don't, but I'm working on it. This book is one that I don't think I'll ever forget, and already at 19 months, we're seeing great benefits with our son. Every situation is a problem to be solved, and if you have an empty tool box then all you've got is what your instincts tell you, and what you were exposed to when growing up. Your mother read Mills and Boon, that's why you guys don't get on. If you want better relationships with the people around you, especially your child, this book will open your eyes. It's not preachy and doesn't pretend to have all the answers, but it's better than the answers you've got.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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High level sound advice

the main points the authors make are useful and I'll be implementing myself in my parenting. It was ironic that they recommend against commanding and using negative language, but the examples of what but to do and the key points section are presented in this way to the reader! I feel like more example of what parents could do should have been given instead, and using the word "don't" less towards the parents reading these books. We learn best by example after all!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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Tools to navigate parenting

The stories in this book reflect everyday struggles I go through with my 3 hound ones. It has given me practical steps which I am able to use most of the time.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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Thank you

I was at my wits end with my toddler but now our lives are so much better after listening to this. Thank you !!

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A wonderful book packed full of help

This book offers wonderful ideas and action points to help with understanding the emotional wellbeing of children between ages 2-7. It offers practical and proactive suggestions that are workable in everyday life to reach solutions to seemingly outrageous outbursts from our little people. It was well read and engaging and definitely a book you can return to time and time again. Highly recommend it!

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Great help in raising kids

Loved this book. It helped me a lot when it comes to dealing and understanding my nearly 3 year old daughter.

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Not for (my) toddler

Whilst the approaches suggested in this book sound like a good idea, I really couldn’t tell you whether they work or not, because I’m miles off from being able to use them with my 2 year old son. The book promises to offer techniques for kids 2-7, but all of them rely on reasoning and explanation, some of them even on writing! And I’m not just talking about basic explanations here, these explanations are so nuanced that articular words and their order are suggested for greater impact. Subtle choices between one thing and another. My 2 year old son has a vocab of about 80 words (mainly nouns) and doesn’t understand yet how to choose between two things. In fact he doesn’t understand much of anything, and I’m sure this inability of the two of us to be able to communicate effectively with words and reason is at the core of his tantrums and frustration. I really felt disappointed to find so little (besides trying to be amusing or fun) that I could use in such a highly rated book. From what I understood, 2 is the really tough time and the perfect time to start laying the basis for positive discipline, however I didn’t find the tools needed in the book for 2 year old. I must commend the explanations for why punishment and praise won’t work. I will definitely revisit this book when my son is older.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 25-08-17

Interesting, practical, useful.

Thank you for writing this! I recommend to any parent. Was extremely helpful. Already seen improvements and got me thinking about it scientifically again instead if just flabbergasted parent.

13 of 13 people found this review helpful

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  • Brittany Vickers
  • 05-05-17

Changed my life

This book completely changed my perspective about how I should talk to my children. It radically changed what I say to my children. I have both the print and audio editions and really enjoyed listening to it so the parental voices became someone else's besides my own.

22 of 23 people found this review helpful

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  • Anonymous
  • 10-07-17

I want to be just like the authors

These authors emphasize the importance of remembering what it's like to be a kid. Big takeaways for me were to acknowledge feelings, describe what I see, be playful, give choices, and describe their wish fantasies. I've used these tools--now my daughter is hopping into her pajamas and likes to be carried to bed upside down. Really resonated with me and made me re-think how I talk to my daughter. Thanks!

13 of 14 people found this review helpful

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  • Gustavo Romo
  • 21-03-17

It works

Just by starting to acknowledge feelings there is a noticeable progress. I am happy the authors noticed the previous book was neglecting children in the age range.

11 of 12 people found this review helpful

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  • SweatyStallion
  • 01-12-17

Loved the book! Not so much some narration parts.

Any additional comments?

The person who narrates "Sarah" uses mutliple upward inflections in the wrong places and emphasizes parts of speech that shouldn't need it. It becomes so annoying that I began skipping her stories altogether. This is still a great listen/read and I would still recommend it to any parents with a toddler.

9 of 10 people found this review helpful

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  • The Wang Family
  • 05-06-17

Must read for parents of small kids!

Would you consider the audio edition of How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen to be better than the print version?

I loved this book. My only regret is that I didn't read it earlier. My daughter is 5 and I learned a lot still.

7 of 8 people found this review helpful

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  • Becky Fischer
  • 09-04-17

Love All the How to Talk Books

There were so many times when this book anticipated my "Yeah, but..." thoughts and doubts. Well written, fun to listen to, and lots of tools to practice using with my 3 boys all 7 and under.

9 of 11 people found this review helpful

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  • Sam
  • 06-10-17

Wish every parent in the world could read this

I think a solution to world peace is if every parent could read and try to follow this book. Seriously. The skills taught in this book could be applied for a life time. Sometimes I feel like the book were a perfect parent speaking to me pointing out ways I could improve on my own life, learning with my toddler.

I've read the famous How to Talk book by her mother, but this is still an excellent read specifically targeted towards younger children's challenges.

What I love most is how practical it is, even acknowledging that kids do turn parents crazy sometimes and how to deal with those tough times!

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • Marion Bartlett
  • 29-09-17

Amazing!

I purchased the audio and paperback version of this book. I have read several parenting books and this is the best and most helpful one by far! I loved all the tools, scenarios, and stories. Even after only reading the first chapter our family life changed. We had known for a while that what we were doing wasn't working, but we didn't know what to do instead. I am so thankful for how empowering this book is for me as a mom! Our home life is completely transformed! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!!

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • Daniel
  • 01-09-17

I found the answer!

I knew there was some peaceful and loving way to treat my children and make them behave civilized without turning them into spoiled criminals in the process. This book changed my life and that of my kids for the good!!!

2 of 2 people found this review helpful