• Dummy

  • The Comedy and Chaos of Real-Life Parenting
  • By: Matt Coyne
  • Narrated by: Matt Coyne
  • Length: 5 hrs and 56 mins
  • Unabridged Audiobook
  • Release date: 20-04-17
  • Language: English
  • Publisher: Wildfire
  • 5 out of 5 stars (66 ratings)

Regular price: £19.99

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Summary

The Sunday Times Top Ten Best-Seller

'The night before Charlie was born, I had this dream. I dreamt that I was a soldier riding into battle, completely naked, and on the back of a large, inflatable duck.'

Matt Coyne has become a hero for thousands of parents everywhere who are devoted followers of his popular blog, Man vs Baby.

This is his book, and it is not your average parenting guide. It's packed with completely impractical advice for the bewildered new mum or dad - stuff you won't find anywhere else: from Profanity Bingo for labour to a categorisation of various nappy disasters. But, more than that, it is the story of how becoming a parent is a kind of beautiful insanity - a thing that changes you.

Above all, Dummy will keep you laughing through the exhaustion, the mystery and the madness of bringing up your own children. This is the parenting book for real people.

©2017 Matt Coyne (P)2017 Headline Publishing Group Limited

Critic reviews

"A hero for dads everywhere." ( Daily Mirror)
"Very, very funny." (Phillip Schofield, This Morning)
"Hilarious but accurate account of finding your feet as a parent. Matt Coyne's post has struck a chord with parents from all over the world." ( Daily Mail )

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What members say

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Insomniacs beware - this book is definitely faulty

I use Audible because I have a sleep problem - I frequently wake in the early hours and find it hard to fall asleep again. The most effective thing to lull me back to sleep is TV but that turns my usually docile partner into a thing of abject misery, so I don't do it. Instead, Audible and headphones keep me company until I drift back to sleep.

Usually I don't mind the fact that I listen to books in sporadic and sleep-imbued chunks, because the upside is that I do get back to sleep. But this book didn't cut it. Instead, it kept me awake and laughing out loud - thereby waking the sleeping grump monster, who was very close to hiding my headphones in the end.

I actually didn't want to go to sleep, either, because I yearned to hear more of the author's musical Yorkshire gruff and colourful use of the full spectrum of insultative profanity. Both added something beautiful to the tales of teething, nappies, and parenting worries, and left me wanting more. How could I sleep, when I was so fabulously entertained?

I finished the book with bags under my eyes, the aching emptiness of sleep deprivation, and a hint of divorce from the grump monster. So be warned, fellow insomniacs. This book is not for sleeping. It is most definitely faulty.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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honest no bullshit advice

found this an easy listen, give a brutally honest guide to stubbling through the first year of parenthood, as an expecting father it was nice knowing no matter what I'm Gona fuck up somewhere along the line but that it's normal to do so and to just keep trying ... the book out me somewhat at ease while giving me a shit tone of anxiety

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Superb

Nice book and very relatable.
Love the humour and the way he doesn’t hold back.

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A lol book for any parent

This is a very good, true and funny book on the early stages on parenting

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Hilariously true

If you're about to become a parent, this refreshing take on the world of babies might be a baptism of fire, but one that will leave you in good stead for what negative (and positive) of what is to come. For those with kids, it's a barrage of fresh takes on things we all know. Matt Coyne bring a beautifully written take of fatherhood and honesty to the point of brutality I lost the count of how many times listening to this I audibly laughed out loud on my packed commuting train and totally worth every weird look from my fellow passengers. 5 stars all round.

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Great, honest book.

Loved this book!

I have read/listened many books recently on babies as my wife is expecting soon and this has to be the best.

As he correctly says, there is no right or wrong way to bring your children up and his words on this are laugh out loud funny and heartwarming.

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Honest, funny and perfect for new Dads

Great to discover this book. Perfect for new Dads but also those like myself with older children interested in reflecting on those early experiences of fatherhood.

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A dad's perspective

A great read - Matt is straight talking, no nonsense and hilarious. His performance on the audiobook added to the humour. Despite all his struggles as a new father, he ends on a very uplifting note

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Funny, touching and very therapeutic!

Parents to be take take heed! It is all true. I laughed along as every sentence resonates with how we faced these challenges with our first child.

I look forward to the sequel, where Coyne describes his adventures moving into the ranks of the "Broken".