Listen free for 30 days

Daughter Detox

Recovering from an Unloving Mother and Reclaiming Your Life
Narrated by: Callie Beaulieu
Length: 10 hrs and 34 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (16 ratings)

£7.99/month after 30 days. Cancel anytime

Summary

A self-help book based in science, the result of more than a decade of research, Daughter Detox offers the daughters of unloving mothers vital information, guidance, and real strategies for healing from childhood experiences, and building genuine self-esteem.

Writer Peg Streep lays out seven distinct but interconnected stages on the path to reclaim your life from the effects of a toxic childhood: "discover", "discernment", "distinguish", "disarm", "reclaim", "redirect", and "recover". Each step is clearly explained and richly detailed with the stories of other women. With approaches drawn from psychology and other disciplines and with unique exercises, the book will help the listener tackle her own self-doubt and become consciously aware of how her mother's treatment continues to shape her behavior.

The message of the book is direct: What you experienced in childhood need not continue to hold you back in life. What was learned can be unlearned with effort.

The book begins with "discovery", opening up the listener's understanding of how she has been wounded and influenced by her mother's treatment. Recognizing the eight toxic maternal behaviors - dismissive, controlling, emotionally unavailable, unreliable, self-involved or narcissistic, combative, enmeshed, or role-reversed - lays the foundation for the daughter's awareness of how her way of looking at the world.

"Discernment" delves into the patterns of relationship in her family of origin and how they played a part in her development, and then shifts to looking closely at how the daughter adapted to her treatment, either silencing or losing her true self in the process.

Next up is "distinguish", seeing how the behavioral patterns we learned in childhood animate all of our relationships in the present with lovers and spouses, relatives, friends, neighbors, and colleagues. The act of distinguishing allows us to see why so many of us end up in unsatisfying relationships.

Active recovery begins with "disarm" as the daughter learns how to disconnect unconscious patterns of reaction and behavior and substitute actions that will foster the growth of self-esteem. Understanding the triggers that set us off, the cues that put us on the defensive, and the default positions of blaming ourselves and making excuses for other people's toxic behavior are addressed.

"Reclaim" is the stage at which the listener begins to actively make new choices, preparing herself so that she can live the life she desires by seeing herself as having agency and being empowered. 

Making new choices and figuring out how to manage her relationship to her unloving or toxic mother is the focus of "redirect".

Finally, "recover" challenges the listener to come up with a new definition of what it means to heal, suggests tools to overcome the obstacles she places in her own way, and strategies to become the best, most authentic version of herself.

©2017 Peg Streep (P)2018 Tantor

What members say

Average customer ratings

Overall

  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    12
  • 4 Stars
    2
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    1
  • 1 Stars
    0

Performance

  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    7
  • 4 Stars
    2
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    1
  • 1 Stars
    0

Story

  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    6
  • 4 Stars
    2
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    1
  • 1 Stars
    0

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars

Dissatisfied

Disappointed that there seemed to be no advice on how to actually deal with your mother aside from breaking contact completely.
Too much describing what it’s like/effects of, a narcissistic mother, not enough solution advice for me. Although there is some. Not what I was looking for though. The author seems to be too close to the subject to give objective advice. Great for someone with the same experience as the author, who ‘divorced’ her mother (Cut contact with).
I’m sorry but to divorce your mother is one of the most annoyingly stupid new modern language terms I have heard of.
The search continues...

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

I love it!

It was presented very well, and I found it was very helpful to me since I am trying to work exactly the same issue. I would definitely recommend it. I've read a few other books that made me feel they were of help, but this one is on the top of my list.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Vivi
  • Vivi
  • 23-09-18

MUST HAVE FOR NO CONTACT SUPPORT

This book is amazing, super helpful especially for those of us that have been dealing with on/off low and no contact. It is a great supplement for continuing and supporting therapy. If you are a therapist and this dynamic is new to your wheelhouse - you need this book!

9 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Amber Zeeff
  • Amber Zeeff
  • 21-09-18

Hits the nail on the head

I never knew I had a mother like this--and I thought it was always me...omg I am so glad to hear there others like this out there and it gives me strength to tell my story plus help many others who have ever dealt with this. Thank you so much for making me feel normal again.

8 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Jinger
  • Jinger
  • 12-03-20

not as helpful as I was hoping

I was expecting more tools in terms of thought process/self talk. I was not expecting to be told to journal and self reflect so much as I've already done that. I got much more out of the book Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers by Karyl McBride

2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for M.R.
  • M.R.
  • 05-12-18

Just what I needed!!

I'm so glad I stumbled on this title. I was so hooked on this audio book that I would listen to it way past my bedtime because I wanted to hear more on this topic. The author would say something so compelling that I would shout out "YES!" and then I felt so relieved to know that it wasn't my fault. The narrator has a very pleasant reading voice, too. There is also an exercise chapter where you are highly encouraged to journal your thoughts.

2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Anonymous User
  • Anonymous User
  • 03-11-19

When they are not the enemy.

it's difficult to heal when the person is described only in terms of horrific faults and my story doesn't go that way. I am the daughter that was not loved for many years because my parents had not being loved. I remember beautiful times and painful times. I loved the honesty of this book in terms of looking at the abuse acknowledging it. what I found to be missing was space for the new one says when one's parents is not the enemy it types of vindictiveness Speights pets in the same token as I'm being given permission to acknowledge my abuse I fully believe my healing comes from understanding love cannot come from where there is no love and healing cannot come without love.

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Danielle
  • Danielle
  • 02-11-19

Read This Book

If you have an inclination that there’s something “not normal” with your relationship with your mother, or if you were drawn to this audible book for one reason or another - listen to this book!

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Catherine Morgan
  • Catherine Morgan
  • 04-04-19

I have a Master's in Counseling Best book EVER!!!!

I'm going to be reading this one over and over! Sad that so many of us need this, but it is Uber healing and restorative.

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Molly Hermes
  • Molly Hermes
  • 08-09-18

Best Advice Ever!!!!

I have read so many books on this subject. This is the best, research-based book I have ever read. Thank you Peg Streep!!!

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for D. Bramble
  • D. Bramble
  • 10-04-20

Pretty Good

Just finished this book. It was pretty good and pointed out some new things for me. I don't entirely like the name of it though. I felt like it should've been called Dealing with Difficult Mothers or something. The name is too narrow and I felt like more people would read it if it was named something else.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Nicola Paine
  • Nicola Paine
  • 21-03-20

Very insightful

A very well thought out and researched gathering of information plus many tips and insights. Was eye opening.