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Daffodils

A Memoir

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About this listen

Louise has revealed the harrowing story in which she reflects on her life and the bridge incident that shook her family to the core.

Content warning: suicide.

2019. Dawn. The River Humber. A misty February walk. Surprise early daffodils. A picture taken. Then forgotten. Because five hours later, my world shattered.

My mother jumped off the Humber Bridge. Had those yellow flowers not delayed me, I might have been there. Could I have stopped her?

In the aftermath of this violent act, I turned to my writing, to my beloved siblings, to our only uncle. I was forced to look at events that led to this suicide attempt. At relationships wrecked by alcoholism. At chronic depression. At our care records. At my childhood. At my mother. At buried trauma never fully explored before. At myself....

When I much later found the picture of those surprise daffodils, I knew it was time to write about that day. I began typing the story that inspired so many of my fictional characters, that shaped the testing things they endured.

My own story.

2023, Audie Awards Original Work, Short-listed

©2022 Louise Beech (P)2022 Bolinda Publishing Grief & Loss Personal Development Relationships Thought-Provoking Inspiring

Critic reviews

"Authentic, unflinching and moving. Written with compassion and humanity and a great deal of love.'" (SE Lynes, author of The Housewarming)

"Upsetting, uplifting and inspiring." (John Marrs, best-selling author of The Good Samaritan)

"A powerful memoir making sense of a complicated childhood." (Madeleine Black)
All stars
Most relevant
I’m a sucker for pathos, and this book is chocka block with it. Heartbreaking, funny, candid, and brave throughout, it is the story of how committed siblings - with the help of their uncle - steer their way through their mother’s neglect, abuse, mental health crises, alcoholism, and attempted suicides. It’s Louise’s story, but the voices of her siblings and uncle add a whole new layer of depth to the story, which she manages to tell from a foundation of strength and survival. Never is it whiny or self-pitying. And yes, I laughed out loud in places, although the afterword brought tears to my eyes. Highly recommend.

Emotional memoir

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Beautifully written and narrated. Such a powerful story.

Resonated with me on a far deeper level than I ever expected. Our lives were similar but totally different. Thank you Louise for the insight into parents with NPD and for sharing your difficult but equally uplifting story. Your often overwhelmingly emotional and traumatic story is beautifully counterbalanced with powerful sibling love and connections. I LOVED the WhatsApp group dialogues which were both supportive and amusing - the ability to retain a sense of humour through the darkest of times. Just fantastic.

Just stunning!

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Moving, funny, beautifully told. This is an incredibly inspiring memoir. I adored every moment even those that broke my heart.
This is not simply a story of a narcissistic mother, but of the incredible, enduring bond of love between siblings with a dark wit and immense generosity of spirit.
I applaud Louise Beech's bravery and vulnerability in sharing this story.

Simply incredible

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Oh my goodness,so relatable, Louise and family you deserve happy ever after now and I hope you get it . Amazing memoir but painful, having grown up with an alcoholic parent I could really relate and this is so brilliantly written and narrated I have listened all night I couldn't stop! There are so many things I want to say but I just can't find the words! I just wish Louise and her family so much love and hope that their lives are full of joy, serenity and love now.

I can't find the words!

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Having read and loved several of the author’s books, I didn’t hesitate to download her memoir. Written with the same consummate skill, it drew me in immediately. A life laid bare, littered with trauma, tragedy and a heartbreaking sense of missing out on what so many of us take for granted. A mother’s unconditional love.
When a shocking event rocks both Louise and her family’s lives, the reader begins to understand the deep-rooted damage caused over decades. Yet … like the titular daffodils, resilience shines through and strength is gained from the knowledge that some people cannot be *fixed*. In the end, we can only do so much. Happiness is something we all seek. Finding it can be hard.
Although I enjoyed the narration, as an audio book newbie I missed the chance to take notes on my device. Because there are so many memorable lines - often darkly comical - that my brain could not retain. Suffice it to say that the author has again proven herself not only a genius with words but a true survivor with a heart of solid gold.

Harrowing, humorous & ultimately filled with hope

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