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The Legendary True Tales of Captain Davo

The Legendary True Tales of Captain Davo

By: UX Marine
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Summary

 A Kiwi sea captain and a barefoot first mate. A woman in red who has never told anyone her name. One very expensive boat and an endless supply of maritime disasters treated like mild scheduling inconveniences. Crocodiles in marinas. Pirates in sampans. Stag parties on flamingos. Ghost warriors at 2am. Every story is completely true. The witnesses never agree. The bottle opener is never returned. New episodes weekly. Produced somewhere near the equator.UX Marine
Episodes
  • The Lazarus Island Incident

    The Lazarus Island Incident
    May 18 2026

    47 boats. 300 drunk people. One inflatable flamingo. And the seven words that silenced an entire anchorage.

    Cap'n Davo promised a quiet Saturday. Finnigan knew it was a lie. The lady in red didn't care either way.

    What started as a peaceful swim stop at Lazarus Island turned into a full-scale maritime siege when a stag party, an HR department on a team-building retreat gone wrong, and a man in salmon shorts who used the word "synergy" on a boat all decided they wanted aboard the Noordic 26.

    Finnigan — one man, one boat hook, zero shoes — held off nine attackers from two flanks while Cap'n Davo sat at the helm drinking and providing unhelpful commentary.

    Then the lady in red stood up. And every man in the anchorage forgot how to function.

    What happened next involved a stolen bottle opener, a pincer movement by marketing executives, a flamingo that slowly deflated during a failed seduction attempt, and seven words spoken so quietly that three hundred people heard them in their bones.

    We can't tell you what the seven words were. Nobody agrees. But we can tell you this: the Ed Sheeran stopped playing. And that improved everyone's day.
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    26 mins
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