I'll Quit When I'm Dead
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Get 3 months for £0.99/mo
Buy Now for £18.99
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Narrated by:
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Frankie Porter
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By:
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Luke Smitherd
About this listen
In this gripping, provocative horror novel, two desperate souls attempt to turn their lives around, with nightmarish consequences if they fail.
Madison has seen better days. Reeling from a bad breakup, self-soothing with junk food, and totally consumed by her lack of direction, she's in need of a big reset. When she runs into an old acquaintance at the gym, Madison is shocked by how fit they've suddenly become. The cause? An all-female fitness boot camp led by ex-military guru Ellie Fellowes. The course is characterized by grueling reps and minimal contact with the outside world, and when Madison signs up to experience it herself, something doesn't feel right. The other students keep acting strangely; Ellie seems almost superhuman, and her intense motivational methods are becoming bizarre, even dangerous. But Madison is getting results. How can she stop now?
Musician Johnny Blake has been struggling with a pain pill addiction after a very public, very bad fall. At the encouragement of loved ones, he retreats to a secluded cottage to detox. But Johnny isn't alone. Something is lurking in the shadows of his new home--a creature unnatural and hungry, one that traps Johnny in a frightening bargain. If Johnny doesn't stay off his pills and keep his end of the deal, he will be eaten alive.
As Madison and Johnny's predicaments spiral into the unthinkable, they will have to look within to find the true and terrifying answer to the age-old question: How badly do you want it?
Nerve-shredding and compulsively listenable, I'll Quit When I'm Dead marks Luke Smitherd as a major voice in horror to watch.
©2025 Luke Smitherd (P)2025 Luke SmitherdCritic reviews
"Luke Smitherd's I'LL QUIT WHEN I'M DEAD is a shadowy mirror maze of terror and suspense. Just when you think you know where it's going, you're blindsided by another shocking twist. I devoured it in two breathless sittings.” —Richard Chizmar, New York Times bestselling author of Memorials
"Your workout begins with reps of thrilling scenarios before stretching into an unputdownable story. All upon a mat of fantastic writing. Never has self-improvement existed on such pins and needles." —Josh Malerman, New York Times best selling author of BIRD BOX and INCIDENTS AROUND THE HOUSE
"Smitherd pulls off one hell of a trick with I’ll Quit When I’m Dead, a uniquely compelling, propulsive thriller and an eerily unsettling horror novel all rolled into one. Highly recommended!" —Christopher Golden, New York Times bestselling author of THE NIGHT BIRDS and ROAD OF BONES
My favourite author for good reason
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The story separately follows two main characters: a socially awkward pop star trying to shake a painkiller addiction, and a neurotic keep-fit enthusiast who'll do anything to get the results she craves. While the two stories are completely separate to each other in general, there are some crossovers to look out for, and plenty of twists at the end to bring the whole thing to a dramatic close.
As expected for any fan of Luke's work, this book does not disappoint. The story flows well with plenty of action and suspense throughout. Narrated brilliantly by Frankie Porter, you won't be putting this book down any time soon.
The Physics of the Dead remains my all-time favourite book by Luke, but this one, and the previous standalone release (You See the Monster), are easily making up my top three.
So Good
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Mr twisty turny brain does it again
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Loved it
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Luke Smitherd is a master storyteller and this is his finest work to date.
Engrossed from start to finish
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