Ask Rachel anything

Empty nest syndrome is real, and can be very painful to navigate. I've already discussed it with Susie, including ideas for how we can manage our feelings in a positive way to help us move on.

• https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/empty-nest-how-to-cope-when-your-teen-moves-out-also-manners-what-are-they-and-what-should-we-te/

But are we looking at it in the wrong way? Change management specialist, Hanna Bankier, hates the term empty nest because it has such negative connotations. 'How can the nest be empty if I'm still in it?'

She encourages us mothers to take a pro-active approach to that next stage of life by planning ahead from as early as when our kids turn tween and teen.

In this discussion, Hanna helps us think differently about this life stage, explains the key mistakes we make and which areas need focus, and how to plan for the nest stage of our life in a really positive, life-affirming way.

Hanna's top five tips:

1. Start early: Begin preparing for this transition during your child's teenage years by gradually shifting your parenting style from hands-on to mentorship.
2. Create a personal plan: Map out your own identity and interests beyond motherhood. Use Hannah's exercise of drawing a circle with your name in the center and identifying activities that energize you.
3. Build a supportive community: Cultivate female friendships and join groups or activities that interest you. These connections are crucial for emotional support and personal growth.
4. Communicate openly with your child: Have honest conversations about how your relationship will evolve, setting expectations and creating a new dynamic as they become independent adults.
5. Embrace the joy of this new chapter: Recognize that this is not an ending, but a new beginning. Celebrate your success in raising an independent child and look forward to the opportunities ahead for both of you.

The key is to view this transition as a positive opportunity for personal growth and rediscovery, rather than a loss.

Free tool:

https://www.birdylauncher.com/freeoffer

Hanna Bankier:

https://www.birdylauncher.com/

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My email is teenagersuntangled@gmail.com
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You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk