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Summary

This intimate memoir reveals the woman inside one of autism’s most prominent figures, Jennifer O'Toole. At the age of 35, Jennifer was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, and for the first time in her life, things made sense. Now, she exposes the constant struggle between carefully crafted persona and authentic existence, editing the autism script with wit, candor, passion, and power. Her journey is one of reverse-self-discovery not only as an Aspie but - more importantly - as a thoroughly modern woman. 

Beyond being a memoir, Autism in Heels is a love letter to all women. It’s a conversation starter, a game-changer, and a firsthand account of what it is to walk in Jennifer's shoes (especially those iconic red stilettos). 

Whether it's bad perms or body image, sexuality or self-esteem, Jennifer's journey is as much a human journey as one on the spectrum. Because autism looks a bit different in pink, most girls and women who fit the profile are not identified, facing years of avoidable anxiety, eating disorders, volatile relationships, self-harm, and stunted independence. Jennifer has been there, too. Autism in Heels takes that message mainstream. 

From her own struggles and self-discovery, she has built an empire of empowerment, inspiring women the world over to realize they aren't mistakes. They are misunderstood miracles.

©2018 Jennifer Cook O'Toole (P)2020 Dreamscape Media, LLC

What listeners say about Autism in Heels

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Some good info but very narrow point of view

I was very excited to listen to this book.
Unfortunately it didn’t meet my expectations. The author uses her own experience and seems to generalize those to be a one size fits all persons on the autism spectrum, especially women, and that’s just wrong. People on the autism spectrum are as diverse as the rest of the human spectrum, if you have met one autistic person, then you have only met one! Not everyone who is autistic has mind blindness not everyone who is autistic (also those diagnosed as adults) has low self esteem and so on. That being said the author has her experiences, some are relevant to this book,she is autistic and a mother of autistic kids so absolutely has that experience/expertise. Unfortunately she chooses to generalize her own views and experience like every AS person is the same as her and that devalues the book. That is disinformation and can cause further problems for those on the spectrum.

2 people found this helpful

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Thank you.

Usually when you wright a book review you start by saying how good it was; however the only words I have for this book is thank you;

1 person found this helpful

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Fantastic and enlightening

I wonderful book that should be read by many girls and women around the world. Thank you for sharing.

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Fascinating, enlightening

I absolutely loved this book - and it's answered a lot of questions for me! I noticed some people criticised the author's animated delivery - I can't imagine why, her delivery suits the book very well. It's extremely enlightening, written with both passion and compassion. Recommended.

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A Truly life changing book.

I really can't express what an incredible book this is. This is an absolute must read for women on the spectrum and the people close to them. The only reason I gave the performance 4 stars was because the sound of her swallowing loudly between sentences drove me a but mad but hey! I have Aspergers! I think its a phenomenal piece of work overall and I'm keen to read her other books.

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sceptical at first but oh so worth it!!

As someone on the spectrum who struggles with my identification as a woman, I assumed this will not be my cup of tea. I could not have been more wrong, Jennifer is eloquently and entertainingly illustrates and explores so many of the experiences I can relate to. This made for a brilliant read and such a help in feeling a little less alienated in the world of autism experiences. Also a guild of sorts for what is to come and a tool to help me explain some of my process more clearly to others.

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Life changing

A quite frankly amazing book. Eye opening and relatable. Each trait discussed is explained in terms of its purpose, how it presents in boys and how it may present in girls. I think this book might have just changed my life.

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This is a must listen for anyone with an interest in autism!

This book grabbed my attention from the first chapter. The fact that the author narrated it adds hugely to the experience. I have stopped numerous times to take note of quotes, there are so many insightful points. This book is a must for anyone with an interest in autism, but the story goes beyond autism and selves into the human experience. I am thrilled I chose this book!

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  • Simon Coriell
  • 22-03-21

Verbose author is difficult to relate to

I'm only part of the way into this book, and I'm starting to get bored. The author is clearly exceptionally smart, but this may be to her detriment when trying to hold the attention of a person with average intelligence. She enjoys using a LOT of adjectives to describe things, and in my opinion, needs to get to the point more quickly without the use of endless, unnecessary words. I want more of her own story in a more succinct fashion,, but maybe I need to wait for that in the chapters ahead. I can tell that she was once an actor by the way she speaks; it may be fine for some people, but her voice is like nails on a chalkboard.
One question I keep asking myself is, why on earth does the author have so many children? Once a person figures out that they have 1, 2 and then 3 kids on the spectrum, don't you say to yourself, maybe I need to stop having them? Perhaps I simply don't relate to the author, particularly in that I have an intense dislike of babies or kids, and she has so many of them. I always sort of assumed the people on the spectrum were not "kid-friendly", and more into animals? Apparently I'm wrong. Well, here is how I feel thus far about the book: As a female on the spectrum, I'm having a difficult time relating to the author because 1) I'm was not a privileged, only child growing up, 2) I'm of average intelligence and did not go to an Ivy League School, 3) I dislike everything surrounding the art of acting, actors, plays, etc., 4) The further away I am from kids, the better, 5) I avoid chaos in my life, whereas the author seems to continually create it for herself (I mean, really, 3 kids AND a husband on the specrum??), and yet she still finds time to write books, give lectures and travel.
I realize that being on the spectrum is not monolithic, but so far, the only thing that points to the fact that the author is on the spectrum is her unique "thing" with numbers and colors ( I forget the term for that). Otherwise, she hasn't allowed me to understand what make her different from other high IQ, Ivy League prodigies who decided to have a bunch of kids, and now crave an intellectual outlet because they're drowning in the "mommy" role.

3 people found this helpful

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  • felix
  • 12-08-20

down my own personal memory lane, with tears

Dear Jennifer, thank you for writing this for us. Thank you for helping me understand my daughter, my sister, my mother, and myself. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story. thank you for writing the books you wanted to read. may we all learn from your courage. <3

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  • kayla
  • 09-10-20

A must read for women with late diagnosis

Jennifer’s book illuminated so many blind spots for me in my life as an undiagnosed autistic female. I cried, laughed and listened along with my husband so I could share my own experience and get his perspective on parts I didn’t understand. We both learned so much.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 30-08-20

amazing

I was completely able to identify with this author and her experiences. i already know i am autistic and this book helped me with conformation. i just hope that i will able to successfully gain my diagnosis so i can have better support in navigating this NT world.

2 people found this helpful

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  • NANI
  • 08-08-20

captivating

loved it. my story was being told by another me. 💘 never thought I would find another experience like mine. very well read. paints a picture anyone can see. thank you!

1 person found this helpful

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  • Utilisateur anonyme
  • 06-08-20

A wonderful book

I loved this. As someone with Autism, this helps me better understand myself. I was diagnosed at 5, but didn't know about it till I was 13. Ever since then I've wanted to learn more about Autism so I could learn about and understand myself. I'm also an aspiring writer and storytelling, so it's a bit upsetting to see how we are portrayed in media. It also seemed heard to find stories of people with Autism like me, so when I saw this book I was so happy and I really enjoyed it.

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  • grey6
  • 12-06-20

Bravo!

This is an excellent read by an important advocate for women on the spectrum. Jennifer's informative and personal style of writing is matched in value by her masterful narration of her journey. I have both the kindle version and audible narration of this important work. Although it was great to reference the text in terms of emerging understanding of neurodiversity, I found myself most enjoying listening to Jennifer add nuance and color to her language. It's as much a work of art as it is a step forward in qualitative research for females with ASD. This rare and wonderful balance gifts the reader/listerner with a sense of deep understanding, while feeling deeply understood,

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  • M. Levitt
  • 17-05-21

Powerful female path of Autism

This book is a great resource for anyone seeking to understand autism and gender roles. The author tells her own life’s ups and down with science and sociology sprinkled in very effectively as well.
I learned so much and am listening for the second time, hearing and learning even more this time.
Bravo and thank you Jennifer!

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  • Kindle Customer
  • 15-05-21

RUINED BY NARRATION

I am still going to try the written version because I think there is a valuable story. The author would have been well advised to choose a professional narrator.

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  • MG88
  • 30-04-21

Miraculous

This book is the single most important book I’ve ever read. It answers all the questions I didn’t even have the words to ask. It’s relatable, entertaining, informative, and bravely human. Now, after all these years, I finally know who I am. I finally make sense.