Try an audiobook on us
A Kilo of String
People who bought this also bought...
-
Lifting the Lid
- By: Rob Johnson
- Narrated by: Gary Furlong
- Length: 7 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall0 out of 5 stars 0
-
Performance0 out of 5 stars 0
-
Story0 out of 5 stars 0
When Trevor Hawkins hits the open road in his beat-up old camper van with his incorrigible dog, Milly, his quest for adventure soon spirals dangerously out of control. The simple act of flushing a hotel toilet transforms his life from redundant sales assistant to fugitive from a gang of psychopathic villains, the police, and MI5. Then there's private detective Sandra Gray, who could cheerfully throttle him for turning a well-paid, piece-of-cake job into a total nightmare. Or could she?
-
A Beer in the Loire
- One Family's Quest to Brew British Beer in French Wine Country
- By: Tommy Barnes
- Narrated by: Jay Foreman
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 7
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 7
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 7
Frustrated by a dead-end job, fed up with renting in London and the loathsome daily commute and, to cap it all, failing to make it as a stand-up comedian, Tommy Barnes was at breaking point. But he didn’t break - instead, he made himself redundant and took off to France with girlfriend Rose to pursue his dream of brewing beer.
-
More Ketchup Than Salsa
- Confessions of a Tenerife Barman
- By: Joe Cawley
- Narrated by: Nicholas Camm
- Length: 10 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 62
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 55
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 55
When Joe and his girlfriend Joy decide to trade in their life on a cold Lancashire fish market to run a bar in the Tenerife sunshine, they anticipate a paradise of sea, sand, and siestas. Little did they expect their foreign fantasy to turn out to be about as exotic as Bolton on a wet Monday morning.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
ok
- By Gary on 21-07-17
-
Chickens, Mules and Two Old Fools
- By: Victoria Twead
- Narrated by: Jilly Bond
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 4
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 3
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 3
If Joe and Vicky had known what relocating to a tiny mountain village in Andalucía would really be like, they might have hesitated. They can have no idea of the culture shock in store for them...no idea they'll become reluctant chicken farmers and own the most dangerous cockerel in Spain...no idea they'll help capture a vulture and be rescued by a mule. Will they stay, or will they return to the relative sanity of England?
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
Enjoyable
- By lilly clarissa on 04-03-19
-
A Van of One's Own
- By: Biddy Wells
- Narrated by: Janine Cooper-Marshall
- Length: 5 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 5
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 4
-
Story3.5 out of 5 stars 4
In her debut memoir, A Van of One's Own, Biddy Wells tells the story of how, propelled by a thirst for peace and quiet, for a modest adventure and, perhaps, for freedom, she left for Portugal on her own, with only her old campervan, Myfanwy, and her GPS, Tanya, for company. Having left just about everything behind, her solo trip forces her to face her fears, her past and herself.
-
Camp Scoundrel
- Doing What It Takes to Survive Paradise
- By: David Luddington
- Narrated by: Chris Dickins
- Length: 7 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall0 out of 5 stars 0
-
Performance0 out of 5 stars 0
-
Story0 out of 5 stars 0
When ex-SAS soldier Michael Purdy comes in front of the judge for hacking the bank account belonging to the Minister for Invalidity Benefits and wiping out his personal wealth, he braces himself for a prison sentence. What Michael doesn’t expect is to be put in charge of a group of offenders and sent to a remote location in the Sierra Nevada Mountains in Spain to teach them survival skills as part of their rehabilitation programme. But Michael knows nothing at all about survival skills.
-
Lifting the Lid
- By: Rob Johnson
- Narrated by: Gary Furlong
- Length: 7 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall0 out of 5 stars 0
-
Performance0 out of 5 stars 0
-
Story0 out of 5 stars 0
When Trevor Hawkins hits the open road in his beat-up old camper van with his incorrigible dog, Milly, his quest for adventure soon spirals dangerously out of control. The simple act of flushing a hotel toilet transforms his life from redundant sales assistant to fugitive from a gang of psychopathic villains, the police, and MI5. Then there's private detective Sandra Gray, who could cheerfully throttle him for turning a well-paid, piece-of-cake job into a total nightmare. Or could she?
-
A Beer in the Loire
- One Family's Quest to Brew British Beer in French Wine Country
- By: Tommy Barnes
- Narrated by: Jay Foreman
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 7
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 7
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 7
Frustrated by a dead-end job, fed up with renting in London and the loathsome daily commute and, to cap it all, failing to make it as a stand-up comedian, Tommy Barnes was at breaking point. But he didn’t break - instead, he made himself redundant and took off to France with girlfriend Rose to pursue his dream of brewing beer.
-
More Ketchup Than Salsa
- Confessions of a Tenerife Barman
- By: Joe Cawley
- Narrated by: Nicholas Camm
- Length: 10 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 62
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 55
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 55
When Joe and his girlfriend Joy decide to trade in their life on a cold Lancashire fish market to run a bar in the Tenerife sunshine, they anticipate a paradise of sea, sand, and siestas. Little did they expect their foreign fantasy to turn out to be about as exotic as Bolton on a wet Monday morning.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
ok
- By Gary on 21-07-17
-
Chickens, Mules and Two Old Fools
- By: Victoria Twead
- Narrated by: Jilly Bond
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 4
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 3
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 3
If Joe and Vicky had known what relocating to a tiny mountain village in Andalucía would really be like, they might have hesitated. They can have no idea of the culture shock in store for them...no idea they'll become reluctant chicken farmers and own the most dangerous cockerel in Spain...no idea they'll help capture a vulture and be rescued by a mule. Will they stay, or will they return to the relative sanity of England?
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
Enjoyable
- By lilly clarissa on 04-03-19
-
A Van of One's Own
- By: Biddy Wells
- Narrated by: Janine Cooper-Marshall
- Length: 5 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 5
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 4
-
Story3.5 out of 5 stars 4
In her debut memoir, A Van of One's Own, Biddy Wells tells the story of how, propelled by a thirst for peace and quiet, for a modest adventure and, perhaps, for freedom, she left for Portugal on her own, with only her old campervan, Myfanwy, and her GPS, Tanya, for company. Having left just about everything behind, her solo trip forces her to face her fears, her past and herself.
-
Camp Scoundrel
- Doing What It Takes to Survive Paradise
- By: David Luddington
- Narrated by: Chris Dickins
- Length: 7 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall0 out of 5 stars 0
-
Performance0 out of 5 stars 0
-
Story0 out of 5 stars 0
When ex-SAS soldier Michael Purdy comes in front of the judge for hacking the bank account belonging to the Minister for Invalidity Benefits and wiping out his personal wealth, he braces himself for a prison sentence. What Michael doesn’t expect is to be put in charge of a group of offenders and sent to a remote location in the Sierra Nevada Mountains in Spain to teach them survival skills as part of their rehabilitation programme. But Michael knows nothing at all about survival skills.
Summary
“Fabulously funny - a real must for lovers of all things Greek.”
After living in Greece for 13 years, writer and reluctant olive farmer Rob Johnson has got used to most of the things that he and his partner Penny found so bizarre at the beginning. Most, but not all.
A Kilo of String is the story-so-far of this not-particularly-plucky couple’s often bewildering experiences among the descendants of Sophocles, Plato, and Nana Mouskouri with occasional digressions into total irrelevances.
This is a book which is almost guaranteed not to change your life, but what it will do is answer many of the fundamental questions about life in Greece, such as:
- How do you avoid ordering a double tomato for your pine marten when booking a hotel room?
- Should olive harvesting be registered with the Dangerous Sports Association?
- Why are chicken livers useful (other than to the chickens themselves)?
Oh yes, and there are some serious bits too about how life in Greece has changed since the beginning of the economic crisis.
A Kilo of String is loosely based on Rob Johnson’s podcast series of the same name, which is free to listen to and download at rob-johnson.org.uk/podcasts/a-kilo-of-string/.