Butch lesbians were once punished for being too visible. Now the internet claims they’re disappearing. So what happened?

We’re investigating the so-called “masc shortage” with lesbian studies professor Dr. Tori Smith and masc lesbian coach Raia Carey. Are masc lesbians actually disappearing, or are dating expectations, changing identities, and decades of lesbian erasure shaping who gets seen? From butch and stud history to transmasculine identities, lesbophobia, and the lack of masculine lesbian representation in mainstream media, we’re unpacking why this dating complaint goes WAY deeper than you’d expect.

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0:00 Where Did All the Masc Lesbians Go?
0:47 What Does It Mean to Be Butch, Stud, Transmasculine & Masc?
6:46 Reclaiming “Dyke”: Empowering or Painful?
10:29 Are We Actually in a Masc Shortage?
11:51 What Kind of Masc Are You Actually Looking For?
13:35 The “Butch Flight” Panic: Why Trans Men Got Blamed
23:29 Are Transmasc People Welcome in Lesbian Spaces?
28:23 The Visible Lesbian: Creation & Criminalization of the Butch
30:13 When Dressing Butch Could Get You Arrested
32:55 The Shared History of Lesbians and Trans People
39:10 Why Patriarchy Fears Masculine Lesbians
42:14 How Lesbophobia Still Shows Up Today
53:27 Code-Switching for Safety as a Black Masc Lesbian
1:00:56 The Paradox of Butch Invisibility
1:03:36 Why TV Keeps Softening Butch Lesbians
1:06:28 The Fight for Butch Representation

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After six years together, living together, building a business and opening our relationship, we broke up… and somehow stayed friends. Two years later, we’re finally unpacking what that actually took. With psychotherapist Jennifer Hanson, we get into why queer people keep their exes so close, when friendship is worth fighting for, when it keeps you stuck, jealousy, new partners, no-contact, boundaries, and the messy process of learning to love someone differently.

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00:00 We Dated for 6 Years… Now We’re Friends
01:44 Why Queer People Stay Friends With Their Exes
05:00 Should You Actually Stay Friends With Your Ex?
08:59 When Is an Ex Worth Keeping in Your Life?
11:45 When You Should NEVER Stay Friends With an Ex
12:10 What If Your Ex Doesn’t Want to Be Friends?
18:18 How Do You Actually Become Friends With an Ex?
19:57 The Boundaries You Need After a Breakup
23:58 Why Am I Jealous If I Don’t Want Them Back?
29:00 Are Non-Monogamous People Better at Breakups?
38:11 Sharing Friends When Your Ex Starts Dating Again
48:17 Do You Need No Contact After a Breakup?
52:30 How We Broke Up While Still Living Together
55:05 The Problem With Hoping You’ll Get Back Together
57:13 Should You EVER Hook Up With an Ex?

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Why do trans and gender-nonconforming people keep showing up suspiciously close to gods, prophecy and ancient religion? With trans historian Sophie Edwards, we follow a wildly gay historical trail through the ancient mediterranean to ask why people crossing gender boundaries were so often imagined as closer to the divine.

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0:00 Why Were Trans People So Close to the Divine?
1:00 Can We Call Ancient People Trans?
2:22 The Enarees: Trans Diviners Trusted by Kings
8:30 Why Was Gender-Crossing Linked to Prophecy?
11:50 The Galli: Rome’s Trans Feminine Priestesses
16:20 Ancient Gender-Affirming Care & the Day of Blood
23:15 How Did Ancient Rome Treat the Galli?
28:49 Where Did the Galli Go?
30:40 The Trans Saints of Early Christianity
31:55 Saint Pelagius: The Trans Saint & Former Sex Worker
42:42 Saint Marinos: Exiled Rather Than Out Himself
51:06 Is Transness Connected to the Divine?
54:15 Tiresias: Gender-Crossing, Gods & Prophecy
59:03 The Mystery of the Bearded Venus
1:04:37 We Have Always Existed

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Thin is back. Ozempic bodies, heroin chic nostalgia, shrinking celebrities, and suddenly the body positivity era feels like a fever dream. We’re revisiting one of our favourite conversations with artist and body liberation advocate Jennarie to unpack what fatphobia actually does to us, why thin privilege is so invisible, and how diet culture keeps turning our insecurity into profit. Because you can’t heal your relationship with your body while still being terrified of looking fat.

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0:00 Thin Is Back, and That Should Scare Us
1:09 Body Liberation Is Bigger Than Body Positivity
4:03 Growing Up Terrified of Being Fat
12:14 Why Fat People Aren’t Allowed to Be Desirable
20:32 Ads
23:17 Who Decided Thin = Attractive?
27:49 When Doctors Blame Everything on Your Weight
36:31 Why “Just Go to the Gym” Is Bullshit
44:25 What Fat Allyship Actually Looks Like
49:12 Ads
51:37 Why Plus-Size Shopping Is a Different Reality
60:15 Why Are We So Afraid of Looking Fat?
64:09 “You Don’t Look Fat” Isn’t a Compliment
67:14 The Fatphobia You Don’t Know You Have
72:30 Ozempic, Heroin Chic & Why Thin Is Back
75:19 How Do We Actually Find Fat Joy?

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Your crush takes three hours to text back, and suddenly your brain has written, directed and cancelled the entire relationship. We’re unpacking queer neurodivergent dating, sex and intimacy with psychotherapist Frankie Talon Rose: rejection sensitivity, limerence, masking, sensory overload, autistic flirting, kink, consent and the ADHD brain thinking about laundry mid-hookup. From AuDHD dating chaos to shutdowns in long-term relationships, this is a practical, spicy guide to building love around the brain you actually have, not the neurotypical fantasy you were handed. Direct communication has never been hotter.

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00:00 Why Queer People Are More Likely to Be Autistic
02:26 Autism Self-Diagnosis vs. Formal Diagnosis
04:52 How Autism–Trans Research Gets Weaponized
06:24 What Is AuDHD? Autism + ADHD Explained
12:00 Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria in Dating
19:59 Limerence, Hyperfixation & Obsessive Crushes
26:31 Autistic Flirting & the Double Empathy Problem
32:21 Sensory Overload on First Dates
37:41 Masking and Unmasking in Relationships
41:53 Autistic Meltdowns: How Partners Can Help
46:11 ADHD, Hypersexuality & Sexual Impulsivity
50:00 Why ADHD Brains Get Distracted During Sex
55:12 Autism, Kink & Sensory Needs in Bed
59:52 AAC and Nonverbal Consent During Sex
1:03:37 Neurodivergent Shame, Sex & Self-Acceptance

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We’re unpacking aromanticism. What if the person everyone calls cold, avoidant, or emotionally unavailable simply doesn’t experience romantic attraction? We’re tracing the misunderstood world of aromanticism; From the rise of the aro label and the pressure of amatonormativity to the myths that confuse aromantic people with trauma, autism, asexuality, or commitment issues. We’re also asking the gay little question society hates most: can intimacy, partnership, and sex exist without romance?

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00:00 Aromantic or Emotionally Unavailable?
01:26 What Does Aromantic Mean?
05:54 Sex Without Romance
13:30 What Falling in Love Feels Like
19:20 Am I Aromantic?
35:05 Aromantic vs. Asexual
39:17 The Aromantic Spectrum
47:28 What Is Amatonormativity?
51:34 Marriage Before Romantic Love
57:44 Aromantic People in History
1:06:15 How Aromanticism Got Its Name
1:14:26 Does “Love Is Love” Exclude Aros?
1:20:52 Aromantic Myths
1:35:15 Allo-Aro or Fuckboy?
1:42:14 Why Aromantics Aren’t Taken Seriously

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We’re dragging lesbian-bisexual relationship drama out of the group chat and onto the mic. From “she’ll leave me for a man” panic to bisexual erasure, biphobia, anxious attachment, queer gatekeeping, and the cursed phrase “basically a lesbian now,” we’re unpacking the insecurities sapphic couples whisper about but rarely say out loud. It’s messy, tender, deeply researched, and yes, someone is probably getting lovingly read.

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00:00 The Man She Might Leave You For
01:02 Lesbian Insecurities, Unfiltered
05:08 It’s Not Really About Him
10:04 The First Sapphic Relationship Panic
15:32 What Am I Not Providing?
21:11 The Straight-Life Fantasy
24:48 The “Good Bisexual” Trap
31:06 Were You Really Left For A Man?
35:25 Are Lesbians Centering Men?
40:31 Bisexuality As The “Deviant Other”
46:35 A Listener Challenges The Narrative
1:00:47 When Queerness Becomes Political
1:12:58 Bisexual Insecurities Come Out
1:20:00 The Pressure To Identify As Lesbian
1:28:32 Sapphic Red Flags Game

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Bisexuality has been gaslit for literally thousands of years. We’re tracing the chaotic, horny, surprisingly academic history of bisexuality. From ancient queer goddesses and emperors building cities for their boyfriends, to Freud being confidently incorrect (again), 1970s sapphic beef, and the Bisexual Manifesto. It’s funny, messy, dramatic, and weirdly validating. Turns out bisexuals weren’t confused. History was just very committed to pretending they weren’t there.

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00:00 The Bisexuality Smear Campaign
01:26 Before Bisexuality Existed
08:11 The Emperor and His Boyfriend
14:52 The African Queen With Wives
21:04 When Bisexuality Was Invented
30:56 The Degenerate Brain Theory
35:26 Alfred Kinsey Changes Everything
42:47 The Scale Everyone Knows
49:24 The Biphobia Wars Begin
01:02:18 Political Lesbianism
01:10:36 Why Bisexual Women Were Targeted
01:17:28 Bisexuals Fight Back
01:23:13 The Bisexual Manifesto
01:28:42 The Woman Who Built Pride
01:34:37 The Real Bisexual Legacy

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