### Mixtape Therapy — Episode 60: You’re So VainWhat does **Carly Simon’s “You’re So Vain”** have to teach us about relationships, self-perception, and the stories we tell ourselves about what other people are thinking?In Episode 60 of **Mixtape Therapy**, Hannah and Scottie dive into one of pop music’s most enduring mysteries while using “You’re So Vain” as a jumping-off point for a much bigger conversation about the **spotlight effect**—our tendency to overestimate how much other people notice, think about, or judge us.Hannah shares her family’s belief that the song is actually about her father, despite his own belief that it’s about him. From there, the conversation moves into the way we discover music, with Scottie explaining his method of saving songs that catch his attention in Spotify before eventually organizing them into playlists.But the real therapy starts when the conversation turns inward.Scottie and Hannah explore how much energy we spend worrying about **how we're perceived by other people**, and what happens when we shift our attention from being liked, understood, or approved of toward **personal growth, authenticity, and being present**.They talk about:* The meaning and mystery behind Carly Simon’s **“You’re So Vain”*** The **spotlight effect** and why we often overestimate how much people are thinking about us* How our perception of our importance in other people’s lives changes as we grow older* Letting go of the need to be positively perceived* Authenticity, self-awareness, and personal growth* What therapy can teach us about being present instead of worrying about how we're being received* **Stand-up comedy**, vulnerability, and the importance of focusing outward rather than inward* Why performers can become disconnected from an audience when they focus too much on themselves* The surprising tendency to underestimate how much other people actually like us* Unspoken expectations and the problems they create in romantic relationships* Communication, emotional responsibility, and expecting people to read our minds* The difference between healthy self-reflection and becoming overly self-conscious* What it means to be “vain” in a relationship—and where the healthy middle ground might beAt its heart, this episode is about **getting out of your own head**. We all wonder what other people think of us. But how much of that story is actually happening—and how much are we creating ourselves?🎧 **Listen to Mixtape Therapy Episode 60: “You’re So Vain”** and join Hannah and Scottie for another conversation where music becomes the doorway to therapy, relationships, self-discovery, and a little bit of laughter.Co-Hosts:Hannah Shaperhttps://youtube.com/@hannahshaper6831https://www.intotheabliss.com/contactScottie Gassnerhttps://youtube.com/@heyjustbehttps://open.spotify.com/show/1THqG0Pch3Gj0kEAAhwmnA?si=VSWIflkQRgOsxUjMEK-o-wwww.heyjustbe.com

**Still Fighting It: Parenting, Mental Health & Holding On When Life Gets Hard | Mixtape Therapy**What does **Ben Folds’ “Still Fighting It”** have to say about parenting, mental health, growing up, and surviving the hardest moments of life?#59 of **Mixtape Therapy**, Scottie and Hannah unpack the emotional impact of “Still Fighting It” and the complicated feelings that can come with the idea of becoming a parent. Hannah opens up about her concerns surrounding having children when there is a possibility of passing on a **heritable mental health condition**, and how the song’s message about preparing a child for life’s struggles hits differently when viewed through that lens.The conversation moves from **parenting and childhood struggles** to school, discipline, communication, and the ways our own childhood experiences can shape how we parent. Scottie shares stories about his daughter and the challenges of watching your kids navigate the same frustrations, emotions, and growing pains that you experienced yourself.But the conversation gets deeper.Hannah shares her experience with **severe depression** and what it meant to get through a period when hope didn't feel possible. Instead of trying to tackle an entire day—or an entire life—she learned to focus on the next **hour, the next small goal, and the next reason to keep going**.Sometimes surviving isn't about feeling hopeful. Sometimes it's simply about **holding on**.They talk about:* Ben Folds and the emotional impact of **“Still Fighting It”*** Parenting and the fears that come with raising children* Mental health and the complicated decision of having children* Depression and what it means to survive a dark period* Taking life **one hour at a time*** Small goals during overwhelming moments* Self-judgment and negative thinking* How therapists can help during a mental health crisis* Supporting someone experiencing depression* Why simply showing up for someone can matter* Childhood experiences and how they influence parenting* Growing up, authority, communication, and getting in trouble* Ben Folds’ **“Rockin’ the Suburbs”** and the universal experience of growing upThis isn't a conversation about having all the answers. It's about **staying connected, finding small reasons to keep moving, and being there for the people we love when life gets overwhelming.**If you or someone you know is struggling, remember that you don't have to solve everything at once. Sometimes the goal is simply to make it through the next hour.🎧 **Mixtape Therapy** explores the songs, stories, memories, and emotions that shape who we are.**Listen. Feel. Talk about it.**Co-Hosts:Hannah Shaperhttps://youtube.com/@hannahshaper6831https://www.intotheabliss.com/contactScottie Gassnerhttps://youtube.com/@heyjustbehttps://open.spotify.com/show/1THqG0Pch3Gj0kEAAhwmnA?si=VSWIflkQRgOsxUjMEK-o-wwww.heyjustbe.com

Why do people get angry at God? In this FREESTYLE, Hannah and Scottie explore the emotions of faith, grief, disappointment, and healing. They discuss why life's unexpected hardships can lead to anger toward God, how directing blame at an abstract source can sometimes hinder personal growth, and how finding meaning through adversity can transform pain into healing. Scottie shares how reflecting on his divorce ultimately deepened his personal growth and changed his perspective on faith. This honest conversation is for anyone wrestling with grief, loss, unanswered prayers, or the difficult question: Why did this happen?Sometimes you just have to press record and see where the conversation takes you. In this special freestyle episode of Mixtape Therapy, Hannah and Scottie put aside the playlist and flow unscripted—no set track, no theme, just authentic conversation. Think of it as the hidden track on your favorite album: spontaneous, raw, and full of surprises.Co-Hosts:Hannah Shaperhttps://youtube.com/@hannahshaper6831https://www.intotheabliss.com/contactScottie Gassnerhttps://youtube.com/@heyjustbehttps://open.spotify.com/show/1THqG0Pch3Gj0kEAAhwmnA?si=VSWIflkQRgOsxUjMEK-o-wwww.heyjustbe.com