The Dating Pool Is a Puddle cover art

The Dating Pool Is a Puddle

A Hilarious Comic Book About Modern Dating, Dating Apps, Bad Dates, Ghosting, and Relationship Disasters

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The Dating Pool Is a Puddle

By: Bethany Jones
Narrated by: AI Voice Eric Smith
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This title uses virtual voice narration

Virtual voice is computer-generated narration for audiobooks.
This audiobook is narrated by an AI Voice. You have laughed at a dating meme in the last 48 hours while secretly wondering whether you will die alone surrounded by half finished craft projects. You have swiped, you have been ghosted, you have sat across from a man who talked about himself for 47 uninterrupted minutes and then asked you to split the check. If you are over 35 and single, you already know the truth that this book says out loud: the dating pool is not a pool, it is a puddle, in a parking lot, behind a strip mall, with someone's ex in it. This book is a hilarious, brutally honest guide to dating anyway, without the affirmations and without the vision boards.

This is not a self help sermon, and it is not a list of red flags you have already memorized, and it is not going to tell you that you are the problem or that the universe has a plan. It is a tell it like it is survival guide from someone who has been in the puddle with you, and it hands you genuinely usable tools: the dating resume, the processed versus unprocessed baggage test, and a vetting mindset that changes everything.

Inside, you'll discover:
• The five layers and four seasons of the puddle, and how to read them
• How to build a dating resume that actually represents you
• The apps that suck, and why they are not your friend
• The kids question, the money talk, and the married before chapter
• Where to actually meet people, and the collapse of third places
• The first date, the bedroom, and the peanut gallery
• The vetting mindset, and why searching feels like hunger

At 35, emotional intelligence is currency, financial stability is currency, and a consistent relationship with a therapist is currency. The puddle is not smaller, it is recycled, and this book teaches you to date with intention instead of desperation. It will make you laugh, and it might just save you from the 47 minute man. Divorce & Separation Love, Dating & Attraction Relationships Funny Witty
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