Crackhead
Book 1
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Get 3 months for £0.99/mo
Crackhead
Buy Now for £6.99
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Narrated by:
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Hugo Butterwick
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By:
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Stu Armstrong
About this listen
WARNING ADULT CONTENT
Trevor Malloy is just your average dead-inside council admin from the crumbling northern town of Smackleton—single, depressed, and one Greggs sausage roll away from a breakdown. Then one night, he smokes crack.
Now he’s hurtling face-first into the seedy underbelly of small-town Britain: from pimping his girlfriend out of a stolen ice cream van to launching a crypto-dogging empire called DoggChain. Along the way, he botches robberies, runs a cactus porn studio in a garden centre, sells fake funerals to real pensioners, and starts an OnlyFans agency for people with extremely niche fetishes.
He's a crackhead. He’s a criminal. He’s also absolutely fucking useless.
A blisteringly filthy dark comedy full of swearing, sex, stupidity, and spice, Crackhead is what happens when Trainspotting shags The Office behind a Wetherspoons bin. It’s bleak, brilliant, and outrageously funny.
Warning: Not for the easily offended. Or the moderately offended. Or really, anyone who thinks “that’s a bit much.”
Rumour has it Crackhead might be heading to TV soon. So listen to it now before it gets banned, burned, or turned into a rubbish TV version starring a bloke who was an extra in EastEnders in 1987!
©2025 Stu Armstrong (P)2025 Stu Armstrong