In this episode with Meshai from Expansive Connection we discuss something we think just about everyone in the lifestyle has experienced at some point: the fear of being judged. The reality is, we all make judgments about people. It's just part of being human. But sometimes those judgments say more about our own insecurities than they do about the people we're judging.

One of the things we love about the lifestyle is that it gives us so many opportunities to be curious, not just about other people, but about ourselves. We're constantly navigating new experiences, meeting different people, and sometimes stepping outside our comfort zones. And when feelings like insecurity, jealousy, or fear of rejection show up, we have a choice. We can let those feelings drive our reactions, or we can get curious about where they're coming from. The biggest takeaway from this conversation is that when we spend less time judging and more time trying to understand, we open ourselves up to better connections, stronger relationships, and a whole lot of personal growth.

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Over the years, we've received countless questions and podcast topic suggestions from listeners, but not every question lends itself to an entire episode. That's one reason we started hosting our weekly Ask Us Anything Friday livestreams in the We Gotta Thing community. Now we're bringing that same open, honest, and sometimes unpredictable conversation to the podcast! In this episode, we tackle some of your most frequently asked questions.

We explore Mrs. Jones's attraction to women, whether we've ever broken a hard-and-fast lifestyle rule and regretted it, and how we approach conversations when meeting new couples. We also discuss navigating unexpected anxiety during play and the delicate question of whether to share our non-monogamous lifestyle with close friends who are curious about the secret to our sexual happiness. We talk about whether a previously declared "pants-on" friendship can evolve back into a sexual connection, what might prompt that change, and how to navigate it together. We also share our favorite ways to gracefully escape a conversation, whether we prefer planning a play date around a specific fantasy or letting things unfold organically, and how our perspectives on aging and attraction have evolved since we first explored the subject back in 2019.

As always, our goal isn't to provide a one-size-fits-all answer, but to share what we've learned along our journey and encourage you to think about what works best in your own relationship. And who knows? If you enjoy this format, Ask Us Anything might just become a regular part of the podcast!

In this episode with Catherine from Expansive Connection Coaching we talk about how Menopause has a way of touching just about everything—and your relationship definitely doesn't get a pass. As estrogen declines, the instinct to take care of everyone, smooth the edges, keep the peace, and put other people's needs ahead of our own can start to change. Sometimes dramatically. Suddenly there's a desire for more space, clearer boundaries, less caretaking, and maybe even a little "I've got no more fucks to give." That can be confusing and scary for both partners, especially when it feels like the rules of the relationship are changing without anyone agreeing to change them. But maybe menopause isn't breaking anything. Maybe it's shining a very bright light on the places where we've compromised ourselves, become too dependent on one another, or stopped showing up authentically.

And if that sounds familiar to those of us practicing ENM, it should. Non-monogamy has a funny way of exposing the fault lines in a relationship, and menopause can do exactly the same thing. The question becomes what we do once we see them. Instead of asking, "How do I get my wife—or my old relationship—back?" maybe we get curious about what this transition is trying to teach us. It's an opportunity for both partners to listen differently, own their stuff, create some intentional space, renegotiate expectations, and figure out who they want to be together in this next chapter. The good news is that those of us who've navigated an ENM journey may already have some of the tools. Because the goal isn't to survive menopause and somehow get everything back to the way it was. It's to build the relationship we didn't know was possible.

Expansive Connection Coaching

Wise Power by Pope and Wurlitzer- Discover the Liberating Power of Menopause to Awaken Authority, Purpose and Belonging

I'm Hot (Ode to Menopause)

Wild and Wise Women's Retreat

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