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The Useless Hotline

The Useless Hotline

By: Max Balegde & George Clarke
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About this listen

Welcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.


Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.



Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:


theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.com


OR


Send a voice note to our Instagram:


https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Max Balegde & George Clarke
Politics & Government
Episodes
  • The Boys Talk Live Show Chaos, George WINS Strictly and Andrew Tells Tour Stories!
    Feb 20 2026

    Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotline


    Welcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.


    Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.



    Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:


    theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.com


    OR


    Send a voice note to our Instagram:


    https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=



    You can also listen here:


    Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234


    Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl



    Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?


    Tiktok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1


    Instagram:

    https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=


    Hosts Socials:


    Max’s YouTube:

    https://youtube.com/@max_balegde

    George’s YouTube:

    https://youtube.com/@georgeclarke


    Max’s TikTok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1

    George’s TikTok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1


    Max’s Instagram:

    https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

    George’s Instagram:

    https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/


    George’s Twitter:

    https://twitter.com/Clarke13George


    00:00 - Intro: Our tour journey and what to expect from this episode

    00:20 - Hilarious tour start and Belfast dressing room chaos

    02:18 - Tour highlights and strange fan encounters

    04:10 - Strictly dance wins and the chaos around voting

    05:50 - Funny school stories and learning disabilities on tour

    07:45 - The drunken Irish night out and mishaps

    12:05 - The epic night out in Newcastle gone wrong

    14:10 - Stage antics and the drunken club appearance stories

    18:20 - Audience antics, fan stories, and backstage surprises

    22:18 - The mysterious "Chopped Cow" fanfic and ridiculous fan interactions

    26:37 - Audience behavior, crowd engagement, and wildest moments

    30:45 - General tour reflections, upcoming shows, and the travel chaos

    35:42 - The differences between social media fans and live audiences

    37:14 - Tour wrap-up, gratitude to fans, and future plans

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Show More Show Less
    39 mins
  • The Boys React To The Epstein Files, The Grammy's and REVEAL Tour Plans
    Feb 8 2026

    Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotline


    Welcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.


    Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.



    Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:


    theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.com


    OR


    Send a voice note to our Instagram:


    https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=



    You can also listen here:


    Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234


    Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl



    Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?


    Tiktok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1


    Instagram:

    https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=


    Hosts Socials:


    Max’s YouTube:

    https://youtube.com/@max_balegde

    George’s YouTube:

    https://youtube.com/@georgeclarke


    Max’s TikTok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1

    George’s TikTok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1


    Max’s Instagram:

    https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

    George’s Instagram:

    https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/


    George’s Twitter:

    https://twitter.com/Clarke13George



    Timestamps:


    00:00 - Intro to the episode and what it covers

    00:20 - Tour stories and hotel mishaps in Sheffield

    02:08 - Woke up hair and quarantine-style hair struggles

    04:13 - Sheffield city vibe and impressions from Max

    05:22 - Tour logistics: number of stops and tour crowd size

    06:42 - The mysterious "six or seven" quantifier and its cultural significance

    07:48 - The viral "6, 7" meme and its generational reach

    08:18 - Embarrassing fan cam moments at concerts

    09:02 - The rules of on-tour games and the "Johnny Johnny" challenge

    10:16 - Vito’s tour vlogs and dancing obsession

    11:12 - Venue sizes: from Wembley to Palladium and ticket sell-outs

    12:02 - Tour marketing strategies and ticket sales insight

    13:08 - Meet and greet tickets and Bristol’s special spot in the tour

    14:21 - Post-Nashville night out plans and fun clips from the tour

    20:02 - The innovative PlayStation Portal device and upcoming Australian tour

    21:32 - Australian media appearances and pronunciation struggles

    22:28 - Anxiety over international impressions and speaking nerves

    24:16 - Upcoming audio cues and halftime fun during the tour

    26:01 - The game: "Does George care about this?" — pop culture topics quiz

    27:15 - Grammys, Bad Bunny’s power move, and celebrity moments

    28:44 - Nostalgia for iconic award show moments and Twitter rabbit holes

    30:24 - Nicki Minaj’s controversial hand-holding and celebrity gossip

    35:16 - The Jeffrey Epstein files: celebrity involvement and conspiracy theories

    39:48 - The Kia Asylum metaphor explained—artists trapped in obscurity or success

    41:16 - Debating whether Sabrina Carpenter and Katy Perry are "out" or "inside" the Kia

    43:39 - The episode’s closing thoughts and the audience's role in sending dilemmas

    47:18 - Final call for concise, funny audience stories and instructions

    48:34 - Sign-off and excitement for upcoming shows and audience meetups

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Show More Show Less
    50 mins
  • The Boys Discuss Nicki Minaj, Going To The Olympics and Cameo Days
    Feb 1 2026

    Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotline


    Welcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.


    Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.



    Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:


    theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.com


    OR


    Send a voice note to our Instagram:


    https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=



    You can also listen here:


    Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234


    Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl



    Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?


    Tiktok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1


    Instagram:

    https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=


    Hosts Socials:


    Max’s YouTube:

    https://youtube.com/@max_balegde

    George’s YouTube:

    https://youtube.com/@georgeclarke


    Max’s TikTok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1

    George’s TikTok:

    https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1


    Max’s Instagram:

    https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=

    George’s Instagram:

    https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/


    George’s Twitter:

    https://twitter.com/Clarke13George


    Chapters


    00:00 Nicki Minaj and Donald Trump: A Political Shift

    03:00 Life in the Spotlight: Touring and Hosting Events

    05:52 Olympic Aspirations: From Bobsled to Curling

    09:06 Figure Skating and Curling: Behind the Scenes

    11:59 The Evolution of Music and Celebrity Culture

    14:57 The Price of Fame: Ticket Prices and Fan Reactions

    17:58 The Changing Landscape of Rap and Rivalries

    31:03 The Evolution of TikTok Personalities

    34:58 Nostalgia for Viral Moments

    38:53 The Rise and Fall of Internet Fame

    41:01 The Business of Cameo and Monetization

    56:51 Reflections on the Cameo Experience



    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Show More Show Less
    58 mins
All stars
Most relevant
Inclusive to the audience with their stories and the answers to them are obviously completely useless but hilarious to listen to!

very funny and well entertaining

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