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Not As We Planned

Not As We Planned

By: Tash Gershfield & Carly Harris
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New episodes every Thursday, with exclusive bonus episodes every Monday on Patreon.

Welcome to Not As We Planned, the honest podcast about relationships, dating, marriage, divorce and motherhood, and all the things no one really talks about.

From becoming a mum and navigating divorce, to rebuilding life as a single mum and dating again in your 30s, we’re sharing the real, messy and unexpected sides of it all.

Life doesn’t always go to plan, and neither do relationships. This is a space for open conversations, shared experiences and saying the things most people avoid.

If you have a question or want to share your story, email us at notasweplannedpodcast@gmail.com


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@notasweplanned_podcast

Tash:

@tash_blake_ivy

Carly:

@iamcarlyharris

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Not As We Planned Limited
Parenting & Families Relationships Social Sciences
Episodes
  • Rosie On Surviving Breast Cancer At 35 With Two Young Children
    Oct 21 2026

    At just 35 years old, with two young children and a daughter about to celebrate her first birthday, Rosie discovered a lump in her breast that would change her life forever. In this incredibly emotional episode, Rosie joins Tash and Carly to share her breast cancer journey, from receiving her diagnosis and undergoing 16 rounds of chemotherapy to losing her hair, having a double mastectomy and discovering she carried the BRCA1 gene mutation. She opens up about the heartbreaking reality of facing cancer as a young mum, the impact on her relationship, making life-changing decisions about her body and fertility, and the fear of her cancer returning that she still lives with today. We also discuss the importance of checking your breasts, recognising changes in your body and why being young and healthy doesn’t mean you’re immune. An honest, powerful conversation about motherhood, resilience and learning to appreciate life after everything changes.

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    1 hr and 1 min
  • We Waited 23 Years To Get Married… He Cheated 3 Months Later
    Oct 14 2026

    Imagine spending 23 years with someone, raising three children together and finally getting married… only to discover he’s been talking to another woman just THREE MONTHS after your wedding. One listener thought she had the perfect life until she discovered weeks of phone calls between her 44-year-old husband and a 24-year-old woman. He insisted he was simply helping her through a breakup, but when she started digging, the truth began to unravel. He’d saved her number under her son’s name, sent intimate messages and told her he loved her. Now, just seven months into their marriage, she’s questioning whether she’ll ever be able to trust him again.


    We also hear from a woman who discovered her partner had been messaging sex workers while working away, only to later find he’d continued searching for them closer to home. After almost nine years together, a daughter and a mortgage, she feels financially trapped and terrified of breaking up her family. But things become even more complicated when the man she once considered the love of her life unexpectedly comes back into the picture. Is he a genuine second chance at happiness, or simply an escape from a relationship she no longer wants to be in?

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    44 mins
  • I Found Out My Husband Had A 16-Year-Old Son I Knew NOTHING About
    Oct 7 2026

    Imagine receiving a letter and discovering your husband has a 16-year-old son you knew absolutely nothing about. One listener had spent years believing his version of how a previous relationship ended, only for a child-support letter to reveal the truth. Now she’s trying to process the fact that her husband kept an entire child secret from her, while working out how they eventually tell their own 10 and 8-year-old children that they have an older brother. And the biggest question is: after a lie this big, how do you ever trust someone again?


    We also hear from a gay listener who’s been secretly sleeping with his married straight male friend for the last year. What started as one drunken night has turned into monthly meet-ups with pre-booked hotel rooms, all while he’s friends with the man’s wife. He’s now developed feelings and wants to know whether his friend could actually want something more. Oh, and then he casually reveals he’s had sexual encounters with seven of his 18 straight male friends.

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    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Show More Show Less
    42 mins
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