We talk with Josh Rittenbach about growing up with a transactional view of God and how shame fed addiction, anger, and collapse in his marriage. We also share the moment the gospel finally felt real and how forgiveness, identity in Christ, and the secret place changed the way Josh lives and fathers his girls.
• growing up Adventist in small-town North Dakota and learning to perform for approval
• separating God from Jesus in childhood imagination and living under a courtroom mindset
• carrying shame from early trauma and trying to stay numb through substances and constant noise
• guilt over “messing up God’s plan” and the slide into weed, cigarettes, and legal trouble
• attempting a reset through theology, psychology, church involvement, and outward stability
• life as a farmer and father while hiding pill use to function and avoid silence
• quitting opioids, facing withdrawals, and hitting emotional rock bottom through divorce
• hearing the message that Jesus is enough and discovering right standing in Christ
• reading Scripture with new hunger and learning what righteousness, justification, and sanctification mean
• Matthew 18 reframing forgiveness as receiving radical mercy and releasing shame
• identity as a beloved son and letting Jesus handle what we cannot fix

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We talk with Aaron Dickerson about growing up with a fear-based view of God, building his identity on performance, and how stress eventually broke through in severe health crises. We share how forgiveness and hearing “You are loved” reshaped Aaron’s view of God and opened a new life of trust, freedom, and discernment
• growing up around Revelation seminars and a distant picture of God
• building an identity on academics and “never making mistakes”
• work pressure, anxiety, ulcers, and the belief that it is all on me
• the shower fainting incident, long-term vertigo, and physical recovery
• a chair injury that turns into infection, sepsis, surgery, and home IVs
• wrestling with disappointment, unanswered healing, and trust in God’s care
• hearing God say “You are loved” and why it took years to believe
• Love Reality skepticism, pride, and the breakthrough conversation that clicked
• forgiveness as the doorway to receiving love
• spiritual gifts, dreams, and practicing discernment with wisdom and Scripture

💰 DONATE & SUPPORT our Ministry: lovereality.org/give
👍 LIKE us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/alovereality
📷 FOLLOW us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/riyoung31/
📚 LEARN more at our site: lovereality.org

Join us for the best gathering on the internet, Internet Church. Every other Friday. Find out at www.lovereality.org/circles

Continue growing with friends! Join a circle over at www.lovereality.org/circles

We challenge the idea that calling ourselves a porn addict is harmless, and we explain how that label can reinforce the very behavior we want to quit. We connect brain science, shame cycles, and Scripture to show how renewing our minds can turn freedom from porn into a new normal.
• why coaching helps when good advice does not stick
• how identity language shapes expectations and behavior
• placebo and nocebo effects as a picture of belief at work
• a personal story about shame and learning to expect lifelong struggle
• why behavior modification and streak tracking can feed relapse binges
• Romans 6:11 and Revelation 1:5 as a foundation for freedom
• renewing the mind so temptation loses its grip
• what a guilt free and shame free path forward looks like

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Join us for the best gathering on the internet, Internet Church. Every other Friday. Find out at www.lovereality.org/circles