No guest this week — just Dimples and The Beard, a stack of unhinged news stories, and a brand-new assistant named Eleanor Vance, who lost her last job at the zoo for reasons we probably shouldn't say out loud. (We say them out loud.)

We also get into the Milwaukee woman who faked her way into a classroom as a substitute teacher, the girlfriend who smeared peanut butter on her severely allergic boyfriend, a Florida poop-bucket situation, the Christa Pike execution saga, the viral claim that California is making short drivers use booster seats, donuts and a DUI at an Indiana courthouse, Dimples' Ford Fiesta donut story and a love letter to Stuc's Pizza.

Plus: Episode 300 is our first-ever livestream — Halloween night, Saturday, October 31 at 7 PM Central, live on Instagram and YouTube. The costumes stay top secret until showtime.

New episodes every Monday.

Subscribe and tell us in the comments: what's the wildest reason you've ever heard for somebody getting fired?

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Heidi Shepherd, vocalist of Butcher Babies, and KateLynn Newberry star in Devour — the wild horror flick with an all-female metal band made up of vampires battling a warlock-run cult including a werewolf and a minotaur. They join Dimples and The Beard to talk about the minotaur fight — shot in about an hour at dawn, two days before Christmas, in the freezing cold — and the "soup room," an actual swimming pool of blood and body parts.

We also get into the casting shuffle that landed Heidi in KateLynn's original role, the improvised "boring Jerry" line that tilted the movie toward comedy, the hurricane that ate the first werewolf suit, how an 8-day shoot stretched to 35, and KateLynn's role in Clint Eastwood's Juror #2 — where Eastwood took her hand and thanked her for being in his movie.

Devour is out now on video on demand!

New episodes every Monday.

Subscribe and tell us in the comments: what's the wildest practical-effects kill you've ever seen on screen?

Check out Heidi

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heidithebutcher

Check out KateLynn

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katelynnenewberry

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Greg Giraldo Jr. is carrying one of the most famous names in comedy — and he's earning it on his own. The New York roast-battle regular joins Dimples and The Beard to talk about starting out under a fake name (Greg Hernandez, and the hacky jokes that came with it), why being a nepo baby is like being a hot girl, and what it's like when every roast battler you face has the same obvious target.

We also get into his day job as a New York City substitute teacher — why seventh graders are the worst people alive, dodging impossible questions from students, and denying to kids' faces that he's the guy from TikTok. Plus the story of how he got FIRED from being Spider-Man at children's birthday parties (the costume-party business is apparently run by the mob and ex-strippers), the roast joke that won him his girlfriend, getting passed over by Kill Tony twice, and growing up as the self-described dumbest of the three Giraldo brothers.

New episodes every Monday.

Subscribe and tell us in the comments: what's the worst odd job you've ever been fired from?

Check out Greg

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/greggiraldojr

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/GregGiraldojr

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🍸 Cocktails with Dimples and The Beard

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📧 For sponsorships or collaborations: cwdatb@gmail.com